Jokes needed to lighten our day. Enter at your own risk!

I will mention your eggcentric humour in your oology.

Groan! Where did you poach these puns?

Give me your best egg puns!!
🥚🥚🥚🍳🍳🍳

Sorry, but I myself have no eggsamples to contribute.

One really shouldn’t egg someone into doing puns.

In fact, I don't do well in pun contests. I crack under pressure.

I don’t crack egg yolks. That’s eggxactly my point!

Egg puns are too eggscruciating for me to feel comfortable saying.

I think I’ve got a winner, so omelette everyone else go first.

Eggcuse me, but do you think I was yolking?

I’ve noticed that people are always trying eggstra hard to crack a bad yolk.

We should all come out of our shells and have more confidence in our puns.

Have a cup of positivitea. 🫖

☕️ May your coffee kick in before reality does.

🤓 You were my cup of tea. I drink
coffee now.

☕️ Words cannot espresso how much you mean to me.

😊 When you're short like me, every bump on the road is a hill you can die on.

😊 If there’s a bee in my hand, what’s in my eye?
Beauty. Beauty is in the eye of the bee-holder.

What do you call a bee that can’t quit talking?
Blabb-bee.

What do you call a bee that can't make up its mind?
A maybee!

My life has been a “rags to slightly better rags” story.

My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe.

I think at this point I am carbohydrate. The transformation is complete.

Next time I’m opening up to someone is my autopsy.

“Be the bigger person.”

First of all, I’m 5’2.

😊 Figure out who you are and do it on purpose.

😊 I hate people. Some of the worst people are people.

Boj,
That is no joke! Speaking truth now:

"I'm not sure if I have free time or if I forgot everything I was supposed to do."

I'm not sure if I have free time or if I forgot everything I was supposed to do.

The answer you're looking for is inside you, but it's wrong.

😊 Good morning to everyone! except to people who don't gain weight when they eat whatever they want.

😊 My fitness goal is to get down to what I told the DMV I weigh.

😊 It's beginning to look a lot like weight gain and crippling debt.

😊 I didn't mean to gain weight, it just happened by snackcident.

😊 stress relief method:
ignoring reality.

Before going after a mouse, what did the dad cat say to his family? "Let us prey."

What does the cat say after making a joke? "Just kitten!"

What color do kittens love the most? Purrrrple.

What's a cat's favorite TV show? Claw and Order.