I have posted about this before as I have had several nightmarish trips to the ER with my dad (who has dementia) over the years.
Today the memory care called to tell me he has a fever and is kind of out of it, which is his go to when about to get sick...when he got pneumonia, kidney infection... in previous ER trips.
I just live with this fear of that call and another ER trip (alone) possibly in the middle of the night.. and then having to arrange 24/7 care for him while in the hospital.. I just dont know how many more of these I can survive.. god.. I pray it doesn't go that way this time.
He always seems to recover but it takes a chunk out of my soul each time... its so hard to deal with this for years and years with no end.
Just needed to vent...
Talked to the nurse earlier and they gave him Tylenol for his fever and was feeling better.. they had to put him in a wheelchair earlier because he was so week. Its just a never ending merry go round with him.
I do wonder about Palliative care...that is different from hospice as I understand. My dad's issue is that he gets so weak... he is hard for the memory care to handle him.. when he is sick.. he has bounced back before tho.. hopefully he will be able to be treated in house this time. The dr will be there tomorrow morning.
Palliative care in the NH made it necessary for them to call us before they transported mom to the ER. We routinely refused and had her treated 'in house".
My mother(with dementia) did the same thing when she was hospitalized with a major UTI. They wound up tying her wrists to the bed rails. Apparently hospitals are allowed to do that. Plus she was combative and we all got tired of being gouged, pinched and slapped. They did put her in a room within sight of the nurses station. That helped with her off the wall behavior. The staff did watch her constantly and she never fell while she was in the hospital.
This is the only place people understand my fear and anguish over this.. when I tell any relatives.. their concern.. if there is any at all..is for my Dad..and never for me.
The reason I have to have 24/7 care is because hospitals aren't equipped to deal with dementia patients... he tries to take out his IV.. tries to get up to go to the bathroom.. whether he can or not, they are my eyes and ears when I am not there. If there is a way around this though.. I wouldn't mind not hiring people.
I guess if he is out of it he wouldn't do all those things.. but in previous hospital stays I felt I couldn't leave him alone.
Why do you need to arrange care for him while he's in the hospital? Is he a wander risk? Ask the hospital social workers to help. That’s what they’re there for.
Sending many hugs your way. Hang in there.