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I posted before but my mom (and I) have had an awful year. Her health has rapidly declined. She has had 4 surgeries in a year! After being in the hospital for 5 weeks with sepsis and then a hysterectomy to correct the infection, she has now been in rehab for about a month. The rehab has been very good and takes great care of her. Unfortunately her health keeps declining. She was not eating well which they are concerned about. Her muscles atrophied in the hospital so she cannot walk anymore, has become incontinent which led to a UTI at the rehab (they have given her antibiotics and it seems to be working thankfully). Her AL has assessed her again and they can take her back, but they suggested hospice come in for comfort care. Honestly I welcome them as I know another hospital stay will surely kill her.
I have an iron clad POA set up 5 years ago. There is a trust set up and we are in the process of selling her home that she was living in before going into AL. My question is what else should I be doing before her cognitive ability totally declines? I realize it could be tomorrow or it could be 2 years from now. But the anxiety of this year is wearing heavily on me. When hospice comes on board my first focus is mom but I am also going to ask who I can talk to, as I need to let this all out. As always I know that you all understand and have been through this so thank you for all of your guidance and help.

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I work at a mortuary/cemetery and the hardest thing to see is the family not prepared for the decisions that need to be made for the final resting place. You do not want to make emotional decisions. If you can make it to the mortuary and make the decisions before she passes this will help. I did this with my mama and daddy and it was so easy.
Do you know who to call after she passes - this will be a question that hospice will ask but be prepared for it. Being on hospice they will guide you and you do not call 911 or the police. You would call the mortuary directly. Get vitals together - you will need this for the death certificate - birth place, occupation, married, divorce, place of birth, highest education completed, Are there special celebrations that are given to her ex: if she were in the military? Church baptism recognition? last rites?
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She should create a Advance Healthcare Directive if she doesn't already have one. She makes a medical appointment with her doctor (or you do and go with her) and bring the template form (can be downloaded from places like Legalzoom.com or Rocketlawyer.com). Then she finalizes it legally for her state of residence. This way, you won't have to second guess any decisions you make on her behalf medically.
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I’m so sorry that you are going through this. It’s really hard.

I think that you are doing everything you can. You have everything set in place to create a comfortable environment for her.

I agree that hospice is the best thing to do at this point.

Wishing you peace as you continue on your caregiving journey.
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