Thoughts on the Aging Care website?

Pamzi, even when you scroll through the pages?

Seriously, I get deleted and you get to rant. Mods this is getting to be as bad as junior high letting one poster poke at another and when they are asked to let it go it gets deleted.

Oh wait, maybe she is the moderator.

I got an award in grade two for having the best handwriting of all the grade two girls. Yee hah! Yippee for me!

Send, you know I Iove you girl but I kind of disagree. I think in a society that already makes people feel bad for so many different things that it would better to just take out the like category altogether. After all on this forum anyway it's all about helping one another mostly, not seeing who is better right? Maybe I'm wrong and if I am I can take the high road but so many things in this world already set us all up for failure anyway.

Nobody press like for this post..........I won't mind.

ISTR.. Just tried that,, it still just shows the most recent one,, but thank you for the advice!

Pamzi, Go to your profile page and open votes or likes, that tells you who. It is tedious because it doesn't collate the information, it is in the order it was received.

It was me, Pammzi! I was always liking your posts. And so many others too!
Sometimes, I come on here to "like" everyone's contributions. Just to be encouraging.

There are usually only 3 "likes" (out of pity, ha ha) on my posts that I have made.
I know who they are.

There have been criticisms on the "likes" feature, trying to put down others who enjoy being acknowledged by their fellow caregivers. I do not "need" likes to know when I have made a contribution.

I grew up in the generation where accomplishments were rewarded, without others feeling jealous, or less, or competitive, or an attack on their self-esteem.
Small rewards like Dean's Honors List for a 4.0 grade average; Medical Assistant (forgot what they honored me for), lol; and of course all those Hallmark cards telling me I was loved, best Mom, Best and loved Grandma, etc.
I once received an A- in group therapy, lol, hilarious right? I asked what was the minus for? They changed it to an "A+. This really happened. It was all part of the funny side of life.

The absence of "likes", can often feel like being shunned if in a community where one has become accustomed to "likes". imo.

And life does bring competitions. I can remember in Jr. High being selected for the Posture Queen, feeling, oh groan, I don't want to be chosen--too shy. But when advanced in the finals, what I recall is how angry my mother was that she had to buy me a dress for the event. Of course, I was glad that I was not chosen.

From now on, maybe I will stop posting "likes", and will stop posting at all if no one "likes" my contributions. ha ha.

I would like to be able to see who has "liked" my posts.. instead of just the most recent one or how many..

Suggestion to AC:
Maybe an entire section of "Archived" posts or discussions (over a year or two old) can be created, with it's own searchbar, accessible by members?

I love reading the posts! They remind me that I’m not alone and some have it worse. This site gives me hope that as mom’s Alzheimer’s progresses, she will find peace and all her anger, fear and frustration will disappear .

Tacy (going back to your 2nd response to me on Nov 26)... I'm sincerely grieved at your horrible experience both in your life and at the digital hands of people PMing you incredibly hurtful things. I'm trying to connect this with your desire to prevent the posting of provably wrong/bad/incorrect/damaging legal advice, and I probably have a knowledge gap since I haven't been on this forum that long. Again, what solution can you suggest that is actually doable? The admins can't police and fact check everything that everyone posts. Using the Report function and then providing the support for the complaint is the only reasonable thing I can think of. What's the purpose of "harsh"? Why not let the admins be harsh by notifying them to remove the erroneous info and maybe banning them from the site for a repeat of bad info?

I support Send's and CWillie's suggestions on the "reply function."  To me it's almost worthless, but it does become so when trying to read posts in chronological order.   

Another issue I find irritating is the dysfunctional limitation on editing posts.   I've never encountered this on any other forum, and see absolutely no value in it.

When replies show up in my news feed they sometimes don't make any sense because they are out of context but it is often not worth the effort to try to figure out who or what is being replied to.

REPLY function:
1) The problem is that the OP can come back anytime to post an update under "REPLY" and it will never be seen by others because it was 3 pages ago.

2) The chronological postings are disrupted when someone uses "REPLY", but they reply to something posted way way back.

No one has time to re-read the entire thread, often several pages long, EACH TIME a "REPLY" notification has been received on our NEWS FEED.

Thank you for addressing these website needs so the AC members can be more helpful.

CW, I like that idea of a notification when OP returns for updates. So many times the OP does not return, it would be helpful in that we wouldn't be searching for OP's responses.

What I definitely would not want to see is a way to tag other users. That, I think would absolutely drive me nuts.

CW, there used to be a count feature that would at least give an idea of how many new posts to a thread since we last posted to it. I miss that. I agree if there was something to differentiate the OP on a thread, would also be helpful especially in this day of so many fly-bys.

Qmnpxl, wish I could say the same.

I think something that would be helpful was if there was a way to highlight any comments made by the OP - sometimes threads take on a life of their own and the original question seems almost forgotten, and sometimes comments answering the original post continue long after the OP has come back to ask further questions or to update us about their chosen course of action.

AgingCareCM:  some suggestions, beyond those addressed in your recent post, but ones which I've felt are worthwhile for some time. 

1.    Add ability to underline or italicize to emphasis specific issues w/I a post.  All we can do now is "shout" in upper case letters.  

2.    As already suggested, add a "report" option to the original post so ads, solicitations and tolls can be reported more readily.

3.    Personally, I find the individual response feature disconcerting.    Often these responses should be mainstreamed so all can read them, chronologically, w/o going back and back to search for the context.  I've given up on some of them reported through the News Feed b/c it requires scrolling back and forth to determine to which specific post a comment or response is made.   That's a waste of time. 

All anyone has to use is use the poster's screen name, and we can tell to whom the comment is addressed.

Or enable the @ function as well as a notification to the poster so she/he knows someone has specifically addressed her/him.

4.     Enhance the search function, which is the most limited I've ever seen.   I keep my own database of important and relevant posts b/c I've found the search function so limited and dysfunctional.

If there's something that's really, really frustrating and limiting, it's the search parameters and inability to find specific posts.   Some are specifically on point to current posts, and it saves posters time from repeating the same concepts over and over.

5.     Create the ability to edit at any time; a limited time for editing forecloses reconsideration much later, or after reading others' posts.  

6.     As to the issue of giving legal and medical advice, I agree that there are issues.   Unfortunately some folks aren't in a financial position to or don't want to, or for other reasons don't or can't get the appropriate advice.   

I've thought that a disclaimer should be posted prominently somewhere so that anyone who does take professional advice KNOWS that it may or may not be from medical or legal personnel, but that it could also be from people with solid experience and advice to share.    The current speech therapy issues is a good example of wrong advice.

Some sights do have such a disclaimer, stating clearly that use of the forum constitutes an acknowledgement that advice is not necessarily from professionals in specific fields, and that users follow such advice with that caveat.

I see no way though  of preventing anyone from following advice that might be wrong.    And it's clear that some folks aren't in the position of making good decisions, or simply lack the experience in even determining how to do so.    At least options are offered for these people.

7.   I don't understand the restriction on our changing our own user names, unless it's b/c it's been determined that some people are using multiple "socks".    I think that's happening right now on the speech therapist thread.

8.   I think it's important to remember that we all gain from participation, and that includes the hosts.   The previous administration used posts in its magazine; there's reciprocal benefit here, and I appreciate the opportunity to share my thoughts.

The only time I was wrong was one time I thought I was wrong but I was really right.

You miss the point. How is someone to know to trust what anyone says here? They shouldn't, so why be cruel or brash? Why not just contribute your thoughts or knowledge without the correcting and condescending tone? There is no point and just causes hurt or embarrassment.

Glad - Opinions and statements of facts are two different things. If someone gets a fact wrong, and someone else who knows that it's wrong should chime in and give the correct info. For example, many people still think taking antibiotics will help a cold or flu. That's not an opinion. That's just plain wrong. Really wrong.

As for opinion which is what you're talking about, yes, I agree, everyone has their own.

Really wrong? Who is to say? What is wrong to you might be someone else's solution. It still comes down to opinion and how we express our own.

I think if someone posts something that is really wrong, then it shows that that person is misinformed, and that it's an opportunity to correct him/her in a friendly and constructive way. That person just might appreciate learning something new. No one knows everything. Not everything we know is correct.

Sounds like lots of confusion about why some threads have the worthless and troublesome reply function. Any discussion does not have the reply function, only questions have the reply, which to some extent makes sense. But how many replies should there be? Right now it is an unlimited number which is where the problems with rude and attack responses are usually generated. Then on the other hand when these undesirable responses happen, they are hidden from those that do not check to see the replies if there is more than one.

Maybe limit replies on questions to only one response. But then there are often many ideas and differences of opinion on what correct response should be. Then those that disagree get involved in bad mouthing another if they don't agree with a response. It is a tangled web.

Can't everyone just treat others how they would like to be treated?

And AC, thank you for making the change of usernames more difficult. Will that also assist in limiting users to one account?

Reading my own post below...
I realize that there could be so many ways to interpret what I was trying to say. Just ignore it.

I am in agreement with Gladimhere, when she said:

"I find the reply function, still, very irritating, still. Unless one checks replies it is often difficult to follow a conversation. It also opens up an opportunity for undesirable arguing, correcting and rudeness."

Thoughts on the Aging Care website...
You mean to get our thoughts on the format and features, correct?

I'm okay with it except for the reply function. You are right. It does make it hard to follow conversations. Plus it would be nice if new posters could be made to stand out more so that they don't get lost in the shuffle. Maybe there could be a method in place where their posts could be highlighted somehow so they don't get missed.
I'm not a computer genius by any means but I'm sure if a new member signed up they could have their queries highlighted.

Since "the reply" option, I have seen caregivers criticize and even attack other caregivers through this feature. It allows for others to incite arguments between caregivers. imo. Caregivers were more polite to each other without this "reply" option.

There is a P.M. option if someone is out to criticize every poster or out to just destroy. Some people just need to pick a fight or argue.

The goal, imo, is to help the OP (Original Poster) with their question.
There was a time when the AC Administrators would monitor and enforce posters to stay on topic.

I would like to see "the reply" option be taken down throughout the website. Noticing there is no "reply" option on this thread.
yay.

I still don't agree there is any reason to expect accurate medical or legal or any kind of expert advice on an open forum. I'll admit I'm not an "expert" on how other forums are run but I've never come across any that don't have a fair share of wacky opinions and advice.

I still don't like the reply option, I'd much rather the OP comes back to update us in the main thread and personal comments to another poster are often not relevant.

Tacy, people on this forum also give wrong medical advice as well. The site needs to decide they either police all of it or none of it. Just like FaceBook and Twitter need to decide they police all speech or no speech. You cannot do only "some". This site doesn't claim to be a legal, financial or medical service. It is a public forum and where there are people, there are complexities. I totally understand your frustration and anger when others give provably incorrect info. You want to reach through the computer and throttle that person. But that is when the community steps in to correct. This site could not exist if it has to police every comment and suggestion. I'm being driven mad by the insistence that CBD cures everything when there is 0 actual clinical evidence that it cures anything. Maybe it would be more productive to find the written proof in the law where the commenter is absolutely wrong and send it directly to the OP via PM? Thank you for being a defender!

For me this site is not very user friendly. No report button, reply function is ineffective at best, no delete of post function, limited time to edit a post and more.

It is a site that is operating like many did 10 years ago, IMO this site really needs updating and finetuning.