Relative preying on parent.

Have a case where an older cousin of mine is preying off my mother.

My mom is a severe alchoholic. She goes in waves, sometimes is semi-coherent, but more often than not it's as bad as it can possibly get. Mixed in, or perhaps subsequent to the drinking, there is also signs of dementia -- repeating herself four times in a three minute conversation, getting lost and winding up forty miles in the wrong direction in a house we haven't lived in over ten year. Of late it's been getting weird where she left a message on the machine telling my wife that she just met my wife's sister and how pleasant she was. My wife has no sister. When asked about it my mom got flustered and kept repeating, "her sister" and then reprimanded me for questioning her memory. I've been told by the hospital, a rehab clinic, and a nursing home she stayed at for a briefly that she has no judgement.

Right now my mom is living by herself, and after talking to the County Social Services numerous times, her doctor, and a few other agencies over the years there appears that there is no changing that anytime soon, though if you ask me the siutation was out of hand years ago.

To make matters worse, I have a cousin who's preying on my mother...though I don't know exactly how or to what extent. The odd thing was that my mom and this cousin passionately loathed one another. When my mother got remarried five years ago, I overheard him go into this five minute rant calling her names I can't write here and how much he hated her ever since he was a kid. Last year while I there for Mother's Day he called to wish her a Happy Mother's Day.

For a while I thought that I was being paranoid, but then a no nonsense uncle of mine took me aside and said the same thing. This cousin is suddenly constantly over at my mom's house. Few times a week. Drinking. He does odd jobs for her and has the key to her house. It's common knowledge in my family that this cousin of mine has suddenly befriended another aging relative and managed to weasel himself into their will. I don't know if that's what he's after, or what. My guess is that's he looking and waiting for some kind of massive payout. I do know that she went to "see his lawyer" a couple years ago, but when I asked her about what she didn't remember seeing his lawyer.

And that's the part that's disturbing. Most times she has no long-term memory. I'll tell her straight out that my cousin is somehow preying off her, that's he's not her friend. Eventually, I'll feel like I got throgh. Unfortunatley, it's only good for that day. The next day she'll tell me how my cousin was over and wants to buy her car, and we start all over again.

I have absolutley no idea what to do about this siutation, or is there's anything that can be done. Calling him up and asking to stop probaby won't be effective.