I wrote on here awhile back about my brother stealing from my Mom who has stage four breast cancer.
Yesterday my BROTHER was diagnosed with testicular cancer. It does not appear to be advanced but would require chemotherapy surgery and radiation.
Now I am the only family member in the house who does not have cancer. I do not have the stamina to care for mother and brother. I do not know what to do or where to go. My uncle can help a little but not 100 percent.
My brother also wants his girlfriend to come over to help with his care and my mom. I do not want her in my mothers house and not sure what to do to keep her out other than call the police. She has verbally harassed my mother and I in the past and called my mom the c--- with cancer.
I would appreciate any and all advice :( I feel alone and stressed
Cellos' first post is at
https://www.agingcare.com/questions/brother-is-stealing-from-mom-170614.htm
ADVERTISEMENT
(http://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-living/weight-loss/expert-answers/water-retention/faq-20058063)
and have been reminded of the intense negative feelings you have toward your brother and your mother.
As I recall, you were to move out with your BF. Are you changing your mind now?
Your brother has a GF; let her take care of him. Or better yet, instead of her coming over, let him move in with her. If he's not taking care of your mother, there's no need for him to stay in that house.
And given your mother's attitude toward you (based on your other post), you need to make a decision whether you're going to continue on with your own life or allow this new situation to drag you back in.
Frankly, I sense that you feel this new situation is justification for staying with your mother. I think you're ambiguous about leaving, and I'm not saying that to be cruel or unkind but as a reality check.
If you have to call the police, do so. I would also alert APS. And then leave.
If you continue in this situation, you're only enabling the abuse that's already existed, and putting yourself in line for even more of it.
I also think you should try to get counseling to address why you would even consider staying in a situation which you wrote in your other post is clearly unpleasant if not outright hostile.
What type of care are you thinking you would be doing for your Mother and your Brother? Depending on the type of breast cancer your Mother has, she can continue to live her life for many years, continue to work and drive.
Your brother should have very limited interruption to his life. Surgery now a days is out-patient. He could go back to work in a few weeks. If the girlfriend wants to help, why doesn't your brother stay with her during his recovery?
I believe you are worrying over things that won't happen.