This January 10th will be 5 years since my dad passed. I was helping care for my mom along with two siblings. There are 5 siblings all together, but one just passed away and the other was caught stealing thousands of dollars from my parents while my father was dying. I was working part time and driving 50 minutes twice a week to take my mom shopping, the bank, hairdressers, doctors and out to eat. The two siblings who both lived 20 minutes from my mom would come about every other Saturday for a while, then it got to be every three weekends, then once a month. The house next to me came up for sale about a year after my dad passed and my mom bought it. My sister's were relived that my mom would have someone close. They promised to help out. They now live 40 minutes away. One sibling came once and soon after there was a family fight and we haven't seen her in over 3 years. The other sibling started to come about once a month, now it's every 3 months. My mom is 77 years old, has COPD and emphysema, she is on oxygen 24/7. She never drove or made friends. I do everything for her, I go see her every night and bring her dinner, I sit with her for an hour during that time. I take her food shopping or shop for her, take her to doctors, banking, hairdresser. I fix things around her house and so dies my husband. At first I asked my siblings for help then I groveled, then I begged and lastly got mad. They told me I moved my mom here and I should take care if her. I've heard every excuse in the book too. We don't speak now and that's ok because I finally gave up. I was making myself sick over it. I feel better for doing this and hope karma kicks their butts one day. To those going through what I have gone through, give up because there is no reasoning with these people. They always have excuses and somehow believe they are right. Don't make yourselves sick over it.
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i agree sally , i never let it bother me and in fact didnt miss their lameness ..
That doesn't mean you don't need help. Does Mom have any paid in-home help now? That would be a less emotionally draining approach than trying to involve your siblings.