All the healthcare professionals tell me "get more homecare" like I'm some moron who doesn't know that I need more homecare. Getting it isn't the problem. The problem is keeping it and mom deciding that they're "mean and say hateful things and are always on their cellphones"' And since it's her home and her money,she is not going to pay for all these "bad" people. "Get one person so there is continuity" the do holders tell me. Well, familiarity seems to breed contempt after about a month. She loves them until they all become mean or they yell. I'm at my effing it's end. All I'm asking for is 21 effing hours a week Monday through Friday so I can work part time. Every time I think ah, maybe we've found Someone, I come home to mom in tears and the tales of woe. Isn't homecare supposed to help keep them out of the nursing home? Well she seems to be building her own case to get to get in one which of course she doesn't think she needs. She does. She can't dress herself or get up on her own or even wipe herself plus she's got dementia in addition to Parkinsons. I'm over this and need to vent. I've vented about this before.
I had cancer 5 years ago which really terrified me, I never told my parents as I didn't think they could handle it at their age, but they were on me to drive them here or there. I plowed through my illness and drove them, which was stupid of me to do. Today, even though I am cancer free, I get panic attacks when I drive, so recently I had to cut all the driving to just around the corner errands. My parents weren't happy with that "who is going to drive us?" I hate the idea of having to put those longer hauls onto my sig other, he would need to take time off from work.
Well, tomorrow mom goes to a neurologist that her neurologist recommended for a ca test evaluation that determines competency and depending on how that outcome will set the gears in motion on if that evoked my P O A.
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Stick it out through the next one and see what happens. Note: If I were you, I would tell these care givers that they CANNOT use their cell phones in your home. Period. Don't like the rule? Don't take the job. I'd fire them myself. They're supposed to keep an eye on mom, entertain her, do some light housework. On their cellphones? Cold day in hell at my house. That's one complaint I'd be sympathetic with.
I don't think that placing her will happen overnight and it won't happen without a lot of effort on your part. I'm not claiming this is an easy solution, but I think it is one you should consider seriously, and start the wheels moving for it to happen.
Hugs to you. This is hard!