I'm tired of my grandmother calling me every day telling me she's bored and wants me to entertain her. I have already snapped at her and asked, "Who's fault is that?" She still has the ability to drive, use public transport if she doesn't feel comfortable driving. She lives in the suburbs with many options to choose from to socialize with other people. But still wants to have family to abuse and entertain her. Is she depressed? You bet but won't take ownership and get treated for it. So her world has gotten so small that her constant companion is the television, going to the grocery store once a week and the doctor she sees once a month for her kidneys. We used to go every week to help her out but now it's down to once a month because of her pitting one person against the other.
When talking to your parents, ask them if they have POA and an advance directive on her yet, while she is still present enough to issue those. This is not your concern, but you could remind them of these documents. She will have a fall at some point and be unable to take care of herself. YOU don't need to sign to bring her home or agree to take a shift. You can be the bad guy who says, no, we need to talk to the social worker because there is no one who can take care of her at home. Medicaid exists as a safety net for folks who lack the funds for a skilled nursing facility.
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