Believing caregivers, how do I reconcile that scripture says to put others before me whereas the secular world says put me first?

Thank you PB and Gershun, you both have blessed my heart with a smile. Thank you both for your lovely words, I do appreciate them so very much! I hope you all had a Merry Christmas and I pray you will have a Wonderful New Year!!

I am maintaining. Struggles still abound but I see Sunshine now as healing happens. Mom got cleared today, 6 months since cancer surgery, so that was a huge blessing. AB is getting ready to have another surgery. Please keep my family in your prayers. I definitely keep you all in mine.
I love you all dearly, and just to know you are here is a beautiful gift.
When I finish school I will be so happy that I can come to spend more time with you guys.
Take care until next time!

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!!

Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God.
Hebrews 12:2

Isaiah 41:10 "Do not be afraid, for I am with you. Do not be anxious, for I am your God. (See Psalm 83:18) I will fortify you, yes, I will help you, I will really hold on to you with my right hand of righteousness.’" ,

Isaiah 41:13 For I, Jehovah (see Psalm 83:18) your God, am grasping your right hand, The One saying to you, ‘Do not be afraid. I will help you.’ NWT

Honor thy father and mother. Love thy neighbor as thyself.

Care for your family how you would wish to be cared for. But remember if you don't take care of yourself, you can't care for others well and you'd be doing them a great disservice. So take care of yourself in the same regard that you care for your family. Things will fall into place.

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Smeshque, I too am sorry for the losses you have suffered.

I know you continue to be strong in your faith but even the faithful need to lean on friends as well. I will pray for you my friend.

Smeshque, it's so good to hear from you. I think about you now and then and wonder what you are up to.

I am so sorry to hear about your losses, your mom's surgeries, and your depression. You are a sensitive and good hearted person. Bad things probably have a greater affect you. I wish I have better words to comfort you except to say that this, too, shall pass. Wishing you strength and endurance to get through this difficult phase of your life.

Wait- “Love thy neighbor AS YOURSELF” not better than yourself. But, of course, people on this site do make sacrifices. Taking care of oneself is necessary.

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Hi all! I hope you all are doing well. I miss you all dearly. This year has been a very sad and rough year. We have had so many losses and sickness and just one things after another it seems,
I have really been struggling with depression, so I ask for prayers.
Mom had two surgeries and that was difficult.
She just lost her older Brother this last week and that has really made her sad.

It has just been a rough season, I know the lord will get us through.

The statutes of the LORD are right, rejoicing the heart: the commandment of the LORD is pure, enlightening the eyes.
The fear of the LORD is clean, enduring for ever: the judgments of the LORD are true and righteous altogether.
Psalms 19:8-9

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It is today that we celebrate:

HE IS RISEN!

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Just ask yourself, "What would Jesus do?"

Of course his message is one of love but he also provides us our time with him to pray and reflect. Keep talking to other caregivers, take a day off, seek time for you. Jesus understands in order to be successful you must be your best self first.

Give your worries and concerns to him as you seek out help. The help will show up. Don't give up.

When we were babies and had colic, cranky spells, sickness, Jesus helped our moms make it. No matter the hardship, he will fix ìt in HIS time. Be patient.

Hey all you beautiful people,
Please forgive me for my absence, but you are all always in my prayers and my heart.

I am stealing a few moments from my studies to just say hello and give you sort a an update.

Since the beginning of the year we have all overcame covid (THANK THE LORD), we have lost several church family members from Covid and yeah this has not been fun.

This last month Mom was diagnosed with a skin cancer on her forehead. We have been through two surgeries in two weeks and she has fought through a lot of pain, that woman is TOUGH ( God gives her strength that is for sure). It has hurt my heart to have to tend to her battle wounds but we are getting it done. I have seen the test results, (yet the Dr. has not called we will see him on Tuesday for stitches removal) but i believe what I am reading is that the last surgery showed that the cancer did not spread to her lymph nodes (Thanks be to God).
It has been difficult.....

I have been working hard at my schooling so that you all will be proud... :)

I hope you all are doing ok and relying on the Lord for all things.
Don't worry too much about what is going on in this world. God will take care of HIS own.

God will always give His children strength to endure through and overcome whatever HE puts in front of them.
Remember pray often and Jesus loves you and so do I.

Be back soon, take care ya'll!

"Now when they heard this, they were pricked in their heart, and said unto Peter and to the rest of the apostles, Men and brethren, what shall we do?
Then Peter said unto them, Repent, and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost."
Acts 2:37-38

Hi Poodle,

I’m not a Christian. There are many monotheistic religions (belief in one God).

I believe (if there is a God), that, as you wrote:

“God originally gave life, and all generations thereafter come from human beings giving life.”

You wrote:
“The more you feel it’s your parents, the more duty you feel towards your elderly parents?”

I don’t think we owe our parents. That would mean, the moment you’re born, you’re already in debt.

I believe on can (if one wants to), out of love (not out of debt), help one’s parents.

This thread is about altruism vs. selfishness, in the context of Christianity.

I wonder about people’s opinion on life.

God gave life vs. your parents gave you life? Which is it? Both gave you life?

Or God originally gave life, and all generations thereafter come from human beings giving life?

Or every life is 100% given by God? Parents have little to do with giving birth to a child?

My personal belief:

I believe we should honor our parents. As for, who gave birth (one’s parents or God)…?

The more you feel it’s your parents, the more duty you feel towards your elderly parents?

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I Stand In Awe
Sovereign Grace Music

You are beautiful beyond description
Too marvelous for words
Too wonderful for comprehension
Like nothing ever seen or heard
Who can grasp Your infinite wisdom?
Who can fathom the depth of Your love?
You are beautiful beyond description
Majesty, enthroned above
And I stand, I stand in awe of You
I stand, I stand in awe of You
Holy God, to whom all praise is due
I stand in awe of You
You are beautiful beyond description
Yet God crushed You for my sin
In agony and deep affliction
Cut off that I might enter in
Who can grasp such tender compassion?
Who can fathom this mercy so free?
You are beautiful beyond description
Lamb of God who died for me
And I stand, and I stand in awe of You
I stand, I stand in awe of You
Holy God, to whom all praise is due
I stand in awe of You
Oh, God
I stand and I will
I stand, I stand in awe of You
I stand, I stand in awe of You
(Holy God) Holy God, to whom all praise is due
I stand in awe of You
I stand, I stand in awe of You
I stand, I stand in awe of You
Holy God, to whom all praise is due (Holy God)
I stand in awe of You

Love your neighbor AS YOURSELF not MORE THAN YOURSELF.

God wants us to love others as ourselves and sometimes the most loving thing to do is get someone else to help with the caregiving so you can recharge your own battery and be more loving. I tried to care for my disabled sibling who is aging and has many health issues, while being a wife, working full time, and helping my daughter with my grandson and I could not do it. I got help from the state and now when I’m with my sibling I CAN be patient, loving, peaceful, generous etc. sometimes loving others means getting help.

The Lord bless you
And keep you
Make His face shine upon you
And be gracious to you
The Lord turn His
Face toward you
And give you peace
Amen, amen, amen
Amen, amen, amen
The Lord bless you
And keep you
Make His face shine upon you
And be gracious to you
The Lord turn His
Face toward you
And give you peace
Amen, amen, amen
Amen, amen, amen
May His favor be upon you
And a thousand generations
And Your family and your children
And their children, and their children
May His favor be upon you
And a thousand generations
And your family and your children
And their children, and their children
May His presence go before you
And behind you, and beside you
All around you, and within you
He is with you, He is with you
In the morning, in the evening
In your coming, and your going
In your weeping, and rejoicing
He is for you, He is for you
He is for you, He is for you
He is for you, He is for you
He is for you, He is for you
Amen, amen, amen
Amen, amen, amen
May His presence go before you
And behind you, and beside you
All around you, and within you
He is with you, He is with you
In the morning, in the evening
In your coming, and your going
In your weeping, and rejoicing
He is for you.

Never let weariness cause you to feel ill towards your loved ones. Sometimes this can be a real challenge as our patience gets worn down each day and our flesh gets weak. Refresh and draw strength in Jesus.

8 For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting.
9 And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.
10 As we have therefore opportunity, let us do good unto all men, especially unto them who are of the household of faith.
Galatians 6:8-10

I love you all and hope you all are doing well. I wish you all a very Happy and Blessed New Year!

You can't help anyone, unless you help yourself.

Period.

God doesn't want you to damage yourself just to help others.

Help comes in different ways. Take care of yourself, and then you can help your family.

I so appreciate your struggle and your desire to do the right thing. I believe setting healthy boundaries and maintaining a healthy balance is in line with God's heart. Easy to say, hard to practice sometimes... With that, I ask God to show me how to pray for my mom -- and he does! I ask Him to provide for every little thing - there's nothing too small to ask for - the right words, the right reactions, the right resources - and then I gain the insight I need for the moment. I'll scream inside my head "I can't handle this" and He'll gently speak to my heart in a loving and reassuring tone, "Yes, you ARE handling this" and I'll realize that, indeed, I am... with Him.

If I had only known the last time would be the last time
I would've put off all the things I had to do
I would've stayed a little longer, held on a little tighter
Now what I'd give for one more day with you
'Cause there's a wound here in my heart where something's missing
And they tell me that it's gonna heal with time
But I know you're in a place where all your wounds have been erased
And knowing yours are healed is healing mine
The only scars in heaven, they won't belong to me and you
There'll be no such thing as broken, and all the old will be made new
And the thought that makes me smile now, even as the tears fall down
Is that the only scars in heaven are on the hands that hold you now
I know the road you walked was anything but easy
You picked up your share of scars along the way
Oh, but now you're standing in the sun, you've fought your fight and your race is run
The pain is all a million miles away
The only scars in heaven, they won't belong to me and you
There'll be no such thing as broken, and all the old will be made new
And the thought that makes me smile now, even as the tears fall down
Is that the only scars in heaven, yeah, are on the hands that hold you now.....

Casting Crowns/Lyrics Find

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Believers who believe:

We Shall Behold Him
Sandi Patty

The sky shall unfold
Preparing His entrance
The stars shall applaud Him
With thunders of praise
The sweet light in His eyes shall
Shall enhance those awaiting
And we shall behold Him
Then face to face
Oh, we shall behold Him
Yes, we shall behold Him
Face to face in all of His Glory
Oh, we shall behold Him
Yes, we shall behold Him
Face to face our Savior and Lord
And the angels shall sound
The shout of His coming
And the sleeping shall rise from
Their slumbering place
And those who remain shall
We shall be changed in a moment
And we shall behold Him
Then face to face
We shall behold Him
Oh yes, we shall behold Him
Face to face in all of His Glory
We shall behold Him
Oh yes, we shall behold Him
Face to face my Savior and Lord
And we shall behold Him
Our Savior and Lord!
Savior and Lord!

A beautiful solo, found on youtube, fba.org
Song is in about 12...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hilP2pK6ols

The message could help caregivers who never felt acceptance from your mother.

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Jesus calmed the storm with His words:

PEACE BE STILL

The story can be found in the bible in Mark 4: 35-41

Believers today can pray to the Lord who has the power to calm the storm.
Unbelievers can also pray to the Lord, asking 'Who is this man [Jesus]?"

Ask God to help you handle the day because you can’t do it by yourself. You may be surprised how much that little prayer helps.

In other words, NO FEAR!

Joshua 1:9
NKJV
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

Isaiah 41:10
New King James Version

Fear not, for I am with you;
Be not dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you,
Yes, I will help you,
I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.’

II Timothy 1:7
New King James Version
For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.

Hi Smeshque!
I will pray.

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Just a quick stop in.
Please keep us in your prayers.
Last I was here Mom was getting better but then she got worse. It has been about a two month battle. Not sure where we stand right now, waiting.....

I thought I was going to lose her, but God was merciful to me and she is slowly getting better.

I will write more later.
Just asking for prayers
Much love to you all.

There's a land that is fairer than day,
And by faith we can see it afar,
For the Father waits over the way
To prepare us a dwelling place there.

In the sweet by and by,
We shall meet on that beautiful shore;
In the sweet by and by,
We shall meet on that beautiful shore.

We shall sing on that beautiful shore
The melodious songs of the blest;
And our spirits shall sorrow no more-
Not a sigh for the blessing of rest.In the sweet by and by,
We shall meet on that beautiful shore;
In the sweet by and by,
We shall meet on that beautiful shore.

To our bountiful Father above
We will offer our tribute of praise
For the glorious gift of His love
And the blessings that hallow our days.

In the sweet by and by,
We shall meet on that beautiful shore;
In the sweet by and by,
We shall meet on that beautiful shore.

In my own situation with my 99 year old mom, I do try to put her first in just about everything, but when I feel myself burning out, I know I won't be any help to her at all if I also don't take care of me. So yes -- in my case, she comes first, but when she starts suffering because I'm burned out, I give myself TLC.