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joelfmi118 Posted August 2020

For people who have lost love one's such as myself which was my beloved wife of 54 years of marriage, died due to virus.

Poor positive patients from hospitals that were being treated from but still had the virus from there local medical faculties to assisted living. nursing homes. like Andrew Cuomo did.


Our president back in April gave Cuomo the Navy comfort for the governor to use , NYC had spent millions to have to Javits to able accept positive, NJ had an area ready to accept positive patient. yet Cuomo did not use these facility, sending our loved one in them to their deaths For example Guwin Nursing home lost 65 senior citizen dye and over 40, 000 died because of his actions through out the states in Assisted living. Nursing homes. These faculties has no PPE not enough nurses aids staff. These people was sent to their dealths


 Please people that lost their loved one get involved, speak out talk to fox network let fox what you think or any other new station that will listen that is not bias

BarbBrooklyn Aug 2020
Joel; I'm so sorry for the loss of your beloved wife.

The NYS Department of Health's policy on mandating that folks who were allowed to return home to their facilities was based on the fact that NYS law says that a facility cannot discriminate against those diagnosed with a specific illness; back in the 1980s and 90's, facilities tried to exclude those with HIV from returning to the places they had called home as they lay dying. It was discriminatory and caused great suffering.

If you look at the facts, it isn't the the Governors of NY, NJ or California said "send those patients to their deaths!". They ALLOWED patients who were being treated to return to the facilities that they had lived in previously. The facilities were TOLD that if they could no longer accomodate those patients, they needed to speak up and they would be transferred to facilities that had the capacity to isolate them.

The BIGGEST problem, early in this pandemic, was the lack of testing capacity and PPE. I am not going to tell you why the privatization of the public health system is a bad thing or whose fault that is. But to say that the Javitts Center or the good ship HOPE were available for folks who were prior facility residents is simply false on the face of it.

I hope that you can come to terms with the loss of your dear wife and heal, both from that and from the terrible anger that you feel. That anger will cause you to suffer health consequences if you don't get some help to get beyond it.

AlvaDeer Aug 2020
Joel,
after receiving an odd PM from you I think I will just have to tell you, that, as kind as people are trying to be to you, you seem still determined to stay stuck in anger. You believe that "laying blame" will help you. It won't.
All of us on the forum have political opinions. Like this nation, they are likely almost evenly split. But here on the forum, for the most part, we lay aside those opinions to try to assist people dealing with issues of caregiving, choices, losses, gains.
You have your choice of what TV and commentators to watch and listen to, your choice of politicians to believe. We all do. And you have your ability to support and work your heart out for the candidates you think can flawlessly run a country during the first pandemic in 100 years and the worst recession since the great depression. My heart goes out to any man or woman taking the helm for our great country right now.
You have your one vote, but that will do nothing for your grief over the loss of what was clearly a very loving and caring relationship for half a century. One you had for 54 years; I lost my 85 year old brother in May. I feel so privileged to have had him, had our love in my life. I feel I do him no honor by mourning his having to leave me, the Little Sister he defended for 85 years. I celebrate the beauty of him, and of all we shared.
Why don't you spend some time here trying to heal by telling us about the woman you so loved, by telling us what you are doing to help yourself heal, by telling of the times that are hard; share with those here who go through the same things.
To me Cuomo is a hero. To you he is perhaps somewhat a monster. And we can poll everyone on forum and likely would come out just about where our country is--50%/50%. I am sorry for your grief, as I am for the grief of any man. I am sorry for your anger, as well, for it eats you from the inside out.
I hope you will go out there and work for your candidates. You will meet people, share with people, and re-enter an active world that can help you to heal.
I wish whatever politicians have the courage now to run to help our country the very best of luck. I wish you the very best as well.
And Joel, just a head up, speaking out to FOX for you is kinda preaching to the choir. Just as a "leftie" like me speaking out to CNN is preaching to my own choir. Right?

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joelfmi118 Aug 2020
Including my beloved wife of 54 years. by sending patients that tested positive with virus into assisted living and nurse homes infecting tens thousands of seniors Cuomo wants loved one to shut up and let him get away with what he did. please READ THIS POSTING BELOW.

Fox News senior meteorologist Janice Dean said Tuesday that she was told lawmakers were “uncomfortable” with her testifying about New York’s nursing home deaths. Dean first spoke with Brian Kilmeade on his radio show “The Brian Kilmeade Show” Monday and noted that she was originally told she could testify and then was cut.

*!Uncomfortable* with people like Janices dean wanting to testifying that is outragious What are they afraid of.

This proves how must he cares about our families. I only hope people like Janice Dean and others make him pay for what he has done to ours these poor people and the lord punishes him.

lilhelp Aug 2020
I agree with you, Joel. It's important for people to tell and others to hear these tragic stories of people who have suffered as you did.. for them to speak out, and talk to sources such as Fox News which may be more inclined to cover those stories without the usual bias seen in today's mainstream news. Some of the conservative radio show hosts may take calls and cover stories like yours.

Many so called mistakes were avoidable ~ as you rightly point out, and much was known to those in charge .. like Cuomo, which makes your story all the more heartbreaking.

AlvaDeer Aug 2020
Joel, I am so sorry for your grief. I think it is often easier to be very angry than to go into grief. If your wife was on hospice care, I do think that her death was imminent or close. That doesn't make it easier, even if expected.
Joel, Comfort was not brought to New York to take Covids patients from the ERs nor from Nursing homes. And there seems no national demands on testing for these homes still, because we have not been able to GET testing, now, after 7 months.
In fact Cuomo had to go begging to get the President to offer it for Covid patients if needed. Javits, for someone who hasn't done hospital field work looks good, but the fact is every single thing in it was portable. Not easy to work with. A long story that, but any field hospital worker could explain it better. As to the whole of it, we STILL don't have PPD and the President has still not used his powers to see it manufactured in our country. And we are well into the pandemic with many not wearing masks because the man they admire most indicated they don't have to. It is their right not to. We have sustained, per capita, more death than anywhere. America has become the "third world" country who can't make masks and can do well in a Pandemic. Through it all ultimately, no matter our politics , we are dealing with a historical event. It is taking our elders. Many of us have them in nursing homes.
I suspect that most in our country are doing their best. If I thought my watching FOX for a week would get your promise in turn to watch CNN for that week I would do it, but as we know this isn't about politics really. It is about human loss and grief and about a virus that happened out of the Wet Markets of China probably, and many many more will come from the same area and the same practices. There will be much loss, and I am sorry for YOUR loss, for it is grievous.
I hope you will heal. As to the political nature of your post, we all have our one vote. There is not a one of us on this forum who would not reach out to our neighbor to help, no matter HOW he or she votes. We are all doing the best we can and I wish all of us so much luck. For you I hope for healing, and am so very very sorry for your loss. I hope that some day you will be able to celebrate the tremendous love and memory you have of 54 years with someone you never wanted to lose. My partner and I know that one of us will go soon. I am 78. He is 80. That won't make that loss any the easier.

igloo572 Aug 2020
Joel - your late wife was on hospice as per your posting in May. Hospice as part of the MediCARE benefit will provide grief counseling for you, I’d really encourage you to take advantage of this .... your engulfed in bereavement. Grief counseling will help. For my moms hospice provider, it was the hospice Chaplin that worked with setting this up.

Not to be harsh, but your wife was very very frail before Covid.
As per your April postings she had broken 3 ribs and 3 bones in her spine in January. She had had falls. She had Lewy Body Dementia and was on hospice. Wanting press Coverage on your wife’s death will inevitably bring up all these facts up and likely even more preexisting health conditions and begs the question as to why you “left” her in AL. You not Gov. Cuomo. Why wasn’t she in a higher level of care facility, like skilled nursing care? AL means they need to be & are pretty good on their ADLs with some oversight. You’ve posted how much it cost (10k) to have her at the AL several times. It comes across imo as more concerned about your wallet than her level of care as per your posts earlier this year; and being unrealistic as to her frail health back in January. Getting press means opening yourself up to comments that can be really ugly (& make my comments look sweet) and they will know your name and who you are cause your on camera. Watch what you wish for.

Were mistakes made? Yes and on a federal level and in every state. The playbook for Covid is still being written. There is no national plan of action, testing or tracing unlike every other 1st world country. Right now it’s schools that are the experiment.

Really think about contacting the hospice group to find out what bereavement counseling is available to you. Your letting your grief eat you up with anger. The counseling is a Medicare benefit.

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