Our site bans comments on politics, but not on religion.

Margaret ,

One of the best caregivers that mom had was a young woman who practiced Wicca. I didn’t tell mom that she was Wiccan because it may have made my mother uncomfortable. Mom would not have understood an ‘earth’ based religion. My mother believes in the trinity, Father, Son and Holy Spirit with Jesus as the savior.

The caregiver told me that she was a solo practitioner of that faith and asked how I felt about it. I simply told her that I did not care about her beliefs as long as she was a good caregiver to my mom.

I asked her if she was going to be bothered by my mom being a life long Catholic. Mom had a crucifix on her bedroom wall and said her rosary daily. The caregiver wasn’t bothered by mom’s religion in the least. So, I then told her that it was not an issue.

I appreciated her sharing this information with me. She did not have to. I’m not sure why she did. She was a very sweet woman and I think she just wanted to be herself around me.

I’m sure that some people may have been uncomfortable hearing her news but I wasn’t. Mom liked her. She liked mom and they got along fine.

Again, I thank you for bringing up this topic. If it is discussed openly and from a non judgmental perspective it is good and we can all learn something.

Did this caregiver influence me to want to become Wiccan? Not at all, but I certainly didn’t mind her telling me about her personal beliefs.

I was interested in the US history given by Daughter of 1930. In our Oz public schools, there is no ‘teacher led’ prayer. In my high school, there was a half hour period a week called ‘Religious Instruction’, where churches could send in someone not connected with the school. If you did not wish to attend RI, you went to the school library for the period. Actually parents’ wish, you needed a note. Readers were mostly Plymouth Brethren (there were a lot in the district), but also a few Jews and atheists. Politically, it seems like a good alternative. I gave up RI age 13 in disgust when a curate covered in acne and fresh out of theological college lectured us on ‘Christ’s egocentric personality’, which I still find bizarre. But then, I have always enjoyed reading.

Adding to my posts.

Try and force someone like my brother to have a discussion that doesn’t have God in it. It’s impossible! He will continue to try and harm with his biblical references which are completely taken out of context.

Once I asked my brother when did he get a theology degree. He got so furious! It was funny! Laugh or cry! I choose to laugh at people like my brother because they certainly aren’t worth crying over!

Oh when I asked my brother how he could try to enlist the help of his son to cover for him cheating on his stepmom, he was floored by my question! He always blamed the woman for his failed marriages. You’d think after wife number four that he would have some inkling that he was a serial cheater! Hahaha

I knew a woman who acted the same as my brother. I ended up telling her that if she were my only example of a Christian or Godly woman that I would definitely become an atheist!

The only thing she ever told her children was, “God is going to punish you!” I told her that God is not some big bully in the sky lurking about to punish everyone!

She chased all of her children away from her and the church. They wanted no part of her hatred and negativity.

I asked this woman if she felt that God loved her. She answered, “Yes, I do!”

I simply told her that she could have fooled me because all I ever heard her talk about was how God would punish people.

She expressed nothing about God’s love, mercy and forgiveness. It was fire and brimstone all the way!

Ever notice that most people who are ‘preachy’ don’t have pristine lives themselves?

My brother is one of the most ‘preachy’ people on the planet!
He will beat everyone over the head with the Bible and in the next second has asked his son to cover for him so he could cheat on his wife! It’s sickening!

Then my brother got mad at his son because my nephew would not help to cheat on his stepmother. He is currently on wife number four.

So how can we take people who are so ‘preachy’ seriously? They lose our respect and don’t do anything to earn it back.

It’s always best to ignore these types of individuals. They are narrow minded and will never listen to reason.

Who cares what they say or think about others? I certainly don’t. Why waste my time and energy on a lost cause? We can’t control other’s actions. We can only control our reaction to it.

lealonnie1, as almost always you do, you have inserted a gentle, kind and loving humor into this thread. Your positivity is what makes Forum the pleasure it is for so many. You always turn away wrath and increase human understanding.
Fun to see AgingCare weigh in, and I love that they have an eye on us. This thread shows we can both be human and remain helpful to one another, and kind.
Aging Care's weigh-in is a reminder to me to "play nice". I often need such reminders! Lest I have to come steal lealonnie1's tums.

Very well said, lealonnie. I hope people will take your wise advice. Some posters ask how to deal with the stress, I usually follow with my faith in God, not preaching just telling the honest truth how I deal with stressful situations. I dislike people pushing any type of religion on others. People have a right to their opinion if they are a believer or not. I like this Forum and we are all going through some troubled times why not give the support we all need.

I tend to ignore or just scroll right by the posts that I don't like, whether they're about jokes, care giving, religion.......whatever. If I want to chew Tums all day, I can call my children and argue politics, or go to social media and have a field day on any number of controversial subjects that everyone is fighting tooth & nail about. Seems to me that people are in the mood to tear one another's throats out right now for several different reasons, sadly enough. I've never seen such hatred expressed by so many. So for me, I am choosing to avoid drama in general and just deal with my mothers daily dose of it, which is MORE than enough for a dose of Tums.

Hi All,
As Sendhelp and others have noted, we do have a general statement in our guidelines regarding religious content. It has always been our policy to keep moderation to a minimum in order to allow conversation to flow. Additionally, it is always our intent to make caregivers' lives easier. That being said, we would like this to be a comfortable place to find answers and support. As with any place a person visits, politics and religion come up- they are an important part of our lives and our discourse. Courteous discussion, even through differences, is welcome here. However, hate speech, personal attacks, or targeting someone based on religion or politics is not tolerated. What we ask is that we converse here in the way that we would when face to face. Generally, we know that at holiday dinners or in mixed company- politics and religion are a sure-fire way to stir things up. For that reason, we don’t encourage it. As moderators, we often make difficult decisions on what we’ll allow. As long as conversations remain civil, we welcome all views and opinions from those who come here to hang out.

Margaret, in the US for a number of years there was a huge political kerfuffle over “prayer in public schools” Many believed it was outlawed and that was the source of much evil. In truth, what was taken away was teacher led prayer. And what that really meant, but few acknowledged, was Christian prayer. Students have always been free to pray, just think of the prayers said daily before tests and exams! So the call was to bring back prayer and watch it solve so much that was wrong. But next to no one clamoring for this would be prepared for the prayers led by a Muslim teacher, a Jewish teacher, a Buddhist teacher, etc. The assumption was and is that it would come from a Christian teacher. Similarly at AC, I think the majority are Christian or would identify with that. I would. But I think it would get very wrong not to include the faiths of others. Your faith should influence every facet of your life so it’s natural to spill over here. But the beliefs of others are equally held, equally valid, and we all need to be prepared to respect them in equal measure

Margaret,

Thank you very much for bringing up this topic. Many people feel as you do.

I admire your courage and caring enough about all fellow posters to start this thread. I appreciate your thoughts on the topic.

There are many world religions. Everyone is entitled to their own beliefs or no belief at all. There are atheist that have fine morals.

I don’t care what people believe. Just be kind to each other. Stop being so defensive. Believe what you want to and respect others.

It boils down to something very simple. We can only control our own actions. We cannot control others.

Even if we voice our opinions on this topic I seriously doubt it would change anything.

Here’s an idea. Start different threads. If Christianity has a thread, then have other threads for people that don’t hold those views. That is only fair.

Alva, if you post an atheist thread I will drop in to say hello and welcome! You are loving and kind and would welcome everyone.

This is why religion and politics shouldn’t be discussed here. It causes arguments here.

I was off the site for three days during a very long trip to Alice, and then when I logged on again I seemed to pick up on a stoush on the Jokes site. I agree that it’s probably inviting more division to dwell on it, so best to drop it. Sorry folks!

sjplegacy: I always admire your wisdom. "These illnesses have no religion". That is so beautifully said.

Initially I thought this an interesting subject, but after reading a few comments I can see that it could be divisive. I bow to your greater wisdom.
Anything divisive is ultimately probably not worth it. We have enough troubles right now in the world; people are feeling shut in and anxious.
So this is going to be the third thread I will leave in as many days, and get back to our attempts to help folks deal with Aging Care.
These illnesses DO have not respect any religion (or our lack of one).

Maybe if the initial poster would state he/she is Jewish, Muslim, Hindu, whatever, the forum could better address their concerns appropriately. I for one, could not comment on any religious practices that I'm not familiar with.

However, if the original post is asking for advice about dementia, AD, or any other illness, wouldn't you want the advice, suggestions, or experience offered by those who can maybe help. These illnesses have no religion. If you're religious, atheistic or angostic and your post can help me, I'm all ears. It's too difficult being a caregiver to worry about who's posting what.

IDK, I think most of the people here are willing to live and let live. I don't mind religious posts as long as they are not proselytizing or demeaning to anyone with a different point of view. Unfortunately some people do take offence easily and can get nasty, and not just about politics and religion. Instead of engaging I've found that it is better to step back, I mean what's the point of getting into it with random people on a forum?

You will not provoke me into dealing with your false accusations.

Isthisreallyreal,
Perhaps you do not know how much your comments are appreciated on the forum?
You are listed as one of AgingCare's TOP MEMBERS for a reason!

That is fitting in, and that is acceptance!
You even have a following of people who agree with you!

I also appreciate and like so many of your comments, even though you have been hostile to me throughout. I figure it to be a personality issue, and I ignore it.

Here is what I found under the AC Comment policy:
"Personal attacks and threatening language are prohibited and will be removed. Avoid the use of profanity and be respectful of others’ sensitivities. Do not post offensive or discriminatory remarks towards groups of people based on their race or ethnic origin, religion, disability, gender, age, veteran status or sexual orientation/gender identity."

Personally, I have been offended and discriminated against the most on the "believer's thread" you mentioned. To my knowledge, there is no ban on posting quotes on AC, including bible quotes.

I agree with Cwillie, in that the "Believer's" thread is inappropriate.
However, I disagree that bible quotes should be relegated to that thread only. Everyone is free to post their opinions everywhere.
If anyone is offended by a bible quote, or any quote, just scroll on by, imo.

Cwillie, maybe that's why I have never felt accepted here.

Thank you for clarifying that, it does make sense out of lots of things.

Send has very good a point - this has much more potential to polarize opinions and spin out of control than it does to temper religious or political comments.

Margaret,
I admit to being opinionated. However, I hold back.
This time, I will comment though.

Starting a discussion on both politics and religion is asking for trouble, dissension, and criticism. imo.

When you target christians by admonishing that group:
["What can we do about it? Perhaps Christians could remember that other faiths have many many followers whose belief is just as important to them,"]
and you did, just there in your statement, you are bringing up and focusing on differences in beliefs between posters here on the forum.

I do not feel 'banned' by saying things about religion or politics, however, a wise person would make some attempt at following the guidelines of the forum hosting one's presence here on the forum, as we are all guests, really. Before someone accuses me of working for AC, let me explain. I will need to go to the AC Administrator to ask that this post be removed, just like any other poster would do.

Again, it is causing trouble to even bring up religious or political difference between posters, imo. In that respect, I agree with the AgingCare guidelines.

When I read the terms of use many years ago I'm sure it said something about religious content but given that there are entire threads devoted to christian viewpoints that is clearly not enforced. The truth is you had better be a middle class WASP if you want to fit into the forum, there may be a sprinkling of others but that is the predominant flavour.

This particular atheist has always had head high on the sight.
I have not found that anyone has any problems with it. That I know of I have not once had anyone attack me for atheism. For writing posts that are too LONG?? Oh, yeah. I get it for that, and well deserved, too. Was even told I was passive aggressive the other day. But as we all know that isn't a religion. Once I even caught it in the neck for calling someone "hon". Never did it again.
I think that a Muslim would be welcomed here. I have had a Jewish poster tell me she wouldn't be around because it was a high holiday for her.
I don't really even think that there is a lot of discrimination politically. We often disagree about what is being handled well or not being handled well, and our "left" or "right" is pretty clear in that.
Basically when I post out best wishes I tell someone my thoughts are with them and when someone who is a believer does they say thoughts and prayers. I don't really know who they are praying to and it really doesn't matter to me and I, even as an atheist, would gladly accept the prayers of anyone.
I am not seeing what you are seeing, and I just wonder if it is a particular post that has you upset recently?
We here all have our own political view and our one vote. We all have our faith or lack of it. We all have our personalities. But I have a feeling if one of us was next door to the other one we would help whenever needed.
Many other faiths (Muslim would be one) often keep their private dealing with family problems within the family. I am not certain if that is why we seem to see few? That is perhaps culture more than faith.
It is an interesting subject. There have been a few times here I have felt somewhat "judged", I have seen people being harsh, but I think I have never been judged because I was an atheist. I mean, it isn't like it is a choice for me. I always tease that I am missing the gene. 78, lots of foxholes, and no religious enlightenment for me in any of them. So far.