Report Fraud on this site

dear alibobali,

you wrote:
"I hope not, either. And specifically I'm referring to the daily posts from new users that read, "Here's my terrible situation"... and then some form of "What would you do?" "Am I wrong for thinking this?" "Am I a bad daughter?" "How do you feel about this?" "What are your thoughts?" "Am I being selfish" etc. It definitely could be random people who make new accounts, not AC staff."

"There are many of those type of posts on AC and for whatever reason, they read funny to me."

----

the more i think about it, the more i agree, that they read funny/weird.

many of them are like fishing for compliments, or obviously writing things to stir up emotions (like "it's all my fault") -- and indeed might very well be fake, just to keep people posting and responding, etc.

there will be trolls, fake messages, etc.

but i really hope it's not a regular thing, with many people, for various reasons, posting fake messages.

hugs!
enjoy the 2nd sunday of 2022!!! :) :) :)

bundle of joy :)

I didn't fall for that scam.

This message did not hit the forum it hit each of our private profiles. This is a scam not someone seeking help. The site was hacked and our profiles were effected.

I think the majority of new posters coming in with "I'm at the end of my rope" and "am I bad?" are genuine and probably have been through being shamed on bigger social media platforms. Reddit, I'm looking at you specifically, but there are others.

For people not in the situation we are, it's always going to be "How DARE you deny mother/MIL anything? My God, she has S4 cancer. Or he just had a stroke or whatever heart operation (or alz/dementia or whatever) Of course your relationship takes second fiddle while everyone goes to HELP! You're a bad person for even bringing it up!"

Few of these people know how it feels to have elders assert their "independence" by not letting their children know what is financially going on but expecting them to be there always. Let alone the next step of them wanting someone to move in with them, or worse yet them with you. Hospice that was assumed to last six months but is going on three years. And so on.

We're not on any major social media. So it takes time for people to find us. When they do, they may feel already societally beat up.

Bundleofjoy, I'm glad you raised this issue.   I've seen several threads and posts in which someone questions her/her behavior, decisions, and/or seeks validation for her/his thoughts and action or inaction. My first thoughts are that this person either has few problem solving skills, hasn't been in a situation in which self esteem is reinforced, and is unsure how to self validate.

There are ranges of self validation, but when someone is so uncertain of some issue as some of the threads here address, it suggests to me that this person doesn't have a strong concept of her/him self even at basic levels.    I also sense a lack of problem solving capability, or knowledge.

At more complex levels, I can understand that.  I think self-worth and respect are mandatory for someone to be at ease with her\himself.    But some of these threads address validation at a very basic level.

I know that this person isn't going to be satisfied by whatever I write, b/c I also often see a lack of honest self assessment, as well as an ability to address personal issues, research and find potential solutions, and explore them.

It's sad that some people have so little self confidence, but it's not something that can be solved in an online forum.

@bundleofjoy -- I hope not, either. And specifically I'm referring to the daily posts from new users that read, "Here's my terrible situation"... and then some form of "What would you do?" "Am I wrong for thinking this?" "Am I a bad daughter?" "How do you feel about this?" "What are your thoughts?" "Am I being selfish" etc. It definitely could be random people who make new accounts, not AC staff.

There are many of those type of posts on AC and for whatever reason, they read funny to me. It's obviously a complicated, emotional scenario and asking vaguely for input from an anonymous forum in this way seems off to me.

And it could just be me and my cynicism. 😉

But even if fake, there are still so many great people and genuine souls on here, and it's a wonderful, helpful, supportive site.

I noticed that more and more posts (that I see) read like this and I find that interesting. Nothing more. x

https://www.agingcare.com/aboutus ;

Down in the lower right hand corner is a small box for reporting issues ("Send us a message")   directly to the Admins.   Provide your e-mail address, URL if the fraud is in a thread, and your conclusion that the thread/post is fraudulent.   I think it's quicker than posting in a thread.

You can also call:   239. 594-3222

dear alibobali,

"And I wonder if mods don't just make up common emotional scenarios to improve SEO (or something like that) and to keep users engaged."

i really hope not.
it would be very, very wrong.

every post brings up emotions; many of us sincerely want to help.
it would be cruel to intentionally provoke those emotions, and for made-up scenarios.

Y'all are too late. I got the $$ transferred to my Cayman Islands account a while ago. Haha

I got it too. I kinda thought the Nigerian 419 scams were more a 2008 thing. But clearly some are still trying them..

I hate to break it to y'all, but she clearly wants me to be her special friend.

I received her message FOUR times! 😉

Here I am Gershun, begging you to do it! We need some sh*ts and giggles around here in the spirit of the new year and all.

I'm tempted sometimes to start a ridiculous thread just for sh*ts and giggles. You know something like "I Think my Cat has it in for Me, What should I do?" You know that sort of thing. But I won't unless someone comes begging me to do it. LOL

I will never forget last Christmas (2020) which is when all the crazies seem to come out of the woodwork. Some dude comes in here asking about how to keep his ahem 'member' erect; he was having trouble in that arena. I told him to insert it into cement and leave it there until it HARDENED. That should solve his problem rather nicely!

Yes, we get trolls here quite often!

FBI

Yes, I received this message as well. I have since reported it.

Oh darn! I thought I was the only one who was invited to have a Personal and Trustworthy Relationship with her as she was intending and willing to empower the change of ownership for the transfer of her Deposits to my person possession for further Investment and Charity Disbursement to the Less Privilege and Homeless. Shucks.

I think I got this same 'message' in an Email once and it came straight from Nigeria, if I recall.

I reported the PM to the admins; there are 3 dots to the right above the message; click on the dots and it offers a chance to Report the message.

I'm wondering how they could do mass PMs. Seems like bot stuff. I hope AC can limit that in the future.

In a word, Yes, and all the time. The only advice I have for any new user is just to decide if you want to engage or not. Sometimes it can be therapeutic for ME to share or discuss something similar from my CG experience, even if the post seems off. You could post a reply in a neutral way -- "Something doesn't seem right here" -- and see what other users have to say. I think there are attention-seekers on the site, fake posts, but many more users are knowledgeable, kind, and sincere. You could Follow those users, if you want, and ignore the rest.

And I wonder if mods don't just make up common emotional scenarios to improve SEO (or something like that) and to keep users engaged. I'm plenty cynical. lol

Welcome! AC has been a lifeline for many and I think it becomes easier to separate wheat from chaff as you go along.

I just got it too.. what next?

It was in my profile too. Yes, u click on the dots and report it.

You can tell its fro overseas by the wording.

I'm pretty new here, but along these lines, I've been wondering if some of the questions posted are fake? Some seem so ridiculous that I feel like they have to be fake. I never say anything in response because you never know, but it does have me wondering. Do any of you think some of the questions posted here are fake?

Was it a private message? Click on the three vertical dots by the senders name for a drop down box to appear and click report.

Xxxxxxx