Can respite care for my 88 year old shut-in husband somehow be obtained free while I have my shoulder surgery ??

It might be time for you to consider placement for your husband. There are AL facilities that offer both independent apartment-style living and also a higher level of nursing and memory care.
These kinds of places are pretty nice for a married couple who want to stay together but need different levels of care. It's something to think about.
Your other question about respite care. Medicare usually pays for a certain number of respite days in a managed care facility for a person. Their doctor has order it. Though it may not be totally free. You may have to pay something if the secondary insurance doesn't entirely pick up what Medicare doesn't. Spend the momeny if you have to. Why shouldn't you at your age?
If your husband has aide care coming in, ask them to have a supervisor contact you. They will help you with setting up a respite stay for him.

Call your Medicare supplemental insurance and find out if respite care is covered for your husband at all, and at what percentage. Don't get your hopes up though, that's my advice, b/c very little in life is 'free' these days, that's the truth.

If you are burned out with caregiving, I'm certain a week's worth of respite won't be enough for you! Shoulder surgery requires more recovery time than a week before you go back to caregiving, first of all. Second of all, it sounds like it's time for your DH to be placed permanently, as the others have already said.

See a Certified Elder Care attorney about the best way to use your accumulated finances to pay for placement, and also get guidance about how to get care for yourself when you need a hip replacement. You won't be able to live alone during that recovery process, that's for sure! Have the EC attorney help you figure out how to get into a SNF for rehab during that recovery process, or ask your supplemental insurance (Medicare) about it. Your doctor would have to order rehab for you after the surgery in order to qualify.

Wishing you the best of luck with all you have on your plate.

I would place him permanently. See an elder lawyer to see how you can split any assets you have. Under Medicaid, you remain in the home, have a car and enough money to live on. Let the lawyer help you with the application but stay on top of things. In my State you only have 90days from start of application to provide paperwork needed, spenddown any assets, and get him placed. With my Mom, I applied in April, she private paid May and June, June I confirmed the caseworker had all the paperwork needed and Mom was spent down. July 1st Medicaid started.

Since you're "so burnt out" and "over it" it may be time instead of looking for respite for your husband that you start looking to have him placed in the appropriate facility where he will receive the care he needs and you can take care of yourself and get back to just being his wife and advocate instead of his caregiver.
Your health issues are just as important as your husbands, so please do what you must to make sure that you both are being well cared for.
And if money is an issue you can apply for Medicaid for him or you both if needed.
Also if your husband qualifies for hospice care, they do offer a 5 day respite while he's under their care, but I don't think 5 days will be enough time for you to recover.
I hope all goes well with your upcoming surgeries.

Probably not. I paid $350.00 a day respite charges Feb 2022. Respite is generally paid by the patient. There is respite time available is the person is on Hospice. Sad but true life isn’t cheap or free.