It’s hard to communicate with some who are negative about everything. Never says anything good.

@Vee
So often the solution is money. If you had more money, you could hire caregivers. You and your kind son need a break. You shouldn’t be stripped of your lives.

I caregive both my parents at the same time. My father is 88 and my mother is 86. My father has several conditions like diabetes, heart condition, and prostrate problems. He can barely stand or walk because of his diabetes. My son has to carry him from point a to point b if not in the wheelchair. This is so taxing on my son because my father weighs 181 lb. We have invested in getting a patient lift hoister to help with lifting my father. My son takes care of his grandfather's hygiene and changing of diapers, as well. I am so thankful for him. My mother has progressive Lewy-Body dementia. It is impossible to have any kind of relationship with her because she lives in her own world of hallucinations, confusion, and mania. She also was a person who was negative all of my years of knowing her as her daughter. On the bright side, my mother has never mistreated me, nor has my father. They have always been good parents to me. Of course, they weren't perfect parents. Who is? They have been generous and caring. This is why I feel guilty sometimes for being short patient, angry, and not want to deal with caregiving. Being their primary caregiver has stripped me of my life and the goals that I have set out. I am very overwhelmed by my responsibilities of caring for both parents. It is so very difficult, and I'm trying not to fall into depression. But, I am so burnt out I don't have words to describe it. Does anybody have any advice to make life for me and my son a little easier?

I caregive both my parents at the same time. My father is 88 and my mother is 86. My father has several conditions like diabetes, heart condition, and prostrate problems. He can barely stand or walk because of his diabetes. My son has to carry him from point a to point b if not in the wheelchair. This is so taxing on my son because my father weighs 181 lb. We have invested in getting a patient lift hoister to help with lifting my father. My son takes care of his grandfather's hygiene and changing of diapers, as well. I am so thankful for him. My mother has progressive Lewy-Body dementia. It is impossible to have any kind of relationship with her because she lives in her own world of hallucinations, confusion, and mania. She also was a person who was negative all of my years of knowing her as her daughter. On the bright side, my mother has never mistreated me, nor has my father. They have always been good parents to me. Of course, they weren't perfect parents. Who is? They have been generous and caring. This is why I feel guilty sometimes for being short patient, angry, and not want to deal with caregiving. Being their primary caregiver has stripped me of my life and the goals that I have set out. I am very overwhelmed by my responsibilities of caring for both parents. It is so very difficult, and I'm trying not to fall into depression. But, I am so burnt out I don't have words to describe it. Does anybody have any advice to make life for me and my son a little easier?

My mom's always been negative, It's her personality and extremely annoying being around her sometimes. I have to walk away from negativity.

Negativity has a domino effect. Before you know it, unintentionally, you become negative yourself, rightly complaining about the other person’s negativity BUT suddenly you also aren’t able to talk about anything but that negativity.

Then the person listening to you receives that negativity, and now they have a dose of negativity, and on it goes in various forms to the next person listening…

Protect your positive self.

It really is difficult to be around someone who is continually negative. After a few minutes I want to leave. I tend to refer to this as hitting my threshold of pain!

If you live with someone who is negative it is even worse.

I am sorry that you are in this situation.

I have told people directly that I do not want to listen to the same negative thing a million times over. If they don’t stop, I walk away.

Care to share a bit more info on your situation?

Slight misunderstanding here of what my comment meant. What I meant is literally, OP can you say something positive to us?

I mean it seriously, because sometimes those who say a particular person is always only negative, end up themselves always only negative and incapable of saying positive things.

My MIL is very negative. She always goes to the 'dark side' if you spend more than 15 minutes with her. She truly believes she has suffered more than anyone else who has ever lived--and I am not kidding when I say that. She really thinks it.

A few weeks ago, her kids (DH, YS and OB) had her put in Hospice care. She is actively dying now and the time to talk and try to get some kind of closure from her is not going to happen.

YS hugged me a couple weeks ago and said "All I want from mom before she dies is for her to say she had a good life and very blessed and to quit the constant negativity and blame".

It's not going to happen.

I've said this before and I'll say it again: If you cannot serve as a good example, you might be serving as a horrible warning.

I like 'venting's' comment. Just straight out call her on it.

My 93-yr old Mom is the same way. She was always fearful, negative, glass-half-empty, cynical, skeptical and suspicious. She lives next door to me, has always been single and I'm her only child. She has gotten worse this past year due to the beginnings of cognitive decline.

Since she eats dinnerr with us every night I have made a rule that we don't talk politics or news from the Anger-tainment channels. If she ignores this I keep redirecting the conversation. Or, my husband will whip out his phone and show her funny things from tiktok, Insta or YouTube. I just won't tolerate it from her. Sometimes she remembers this boundary and other times not. I always defend it because she's never going to change.

Can you say something positive to us?