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Mariavictoria30 Posted July 2023

Not a question just looking for virtual hugs and support.

Hi all, my father has entered hospice about a month ago and I’ve been having a super hard time coping with it. It feels so strange to not be taking him anymore to doctors’ appointments (it came to the point that we were taking him in a medical stretcher) he’s been doing well with it for the most part a lot of family visiting that hasn’t seen him in a long time but now he’s not really eating we’re giving him ensure and he’s sleeping a lot. It’s just hard to watch I’ve been really close with my dad for a long time and it’s hard on me to know that we are at the beginning of the end. The doctor has not given us a time frame and the hospice nurses all say he looks like he’s doing well. We lost my mom to the same disease (dementia) 10 years ago :( ever since then it’s been us against the world. It’s difficult for me to do anything for myself I’m always going to the nursing home to be by his side because I’m so afraid that our time is running out :(. Please send hugs and we’ll wish I really need them right now :(.

Court74 Jul 2023
Sending you love and hugs and thoughts and prayers. There's nothing that compares to what you're feeling and going through now. Even if it's for the best that really isn't a factor. This is about your emotions and how your processing what you're all going through. When your role changes in definition it's very unnerving and leaves you unsure what direction to move.

CaregiverL Jul 2023
Hugs 🤗 🙏🏼

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Midkid58 Jul 2023
((Hugs to you))

As a woman of 'faith' I knew that my dad and mom were simply moving from one state of existence into another. Like walking through a door.

I honestly still feel VERY close to my daddy, and it's been almost 19 years since he passed. When I am really low, and I am praying for comfort, he is there, I can feel his love and suport. He reminds me that this life is fleeting and it's all going to be OK.

I have not felt anything from mom-but we had a difficult relationhsip and it will take time.

Be kind to yoursef. You are in the pre-grieving state, and honestly, that's the hardest part, I think. Once they have passed, you can re-assess your life and find peace and calm.

Way2tired Jul 2023
So sorry . This is of course difficult for you. You are a caring person .
Take comfort in that Dad is being kept comfortable. Hospice is also for the family , They can help you with grief counseling. ((Hugs))

anonymous1732518 Jul 2023
<((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))

funkygrandma59 Jul 2023
Now may "the Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make His face shine on you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn His face toward you and give you peace." Numbers 6:24-26

Mariavictoria30 Jul 2023
Thank you everyone so much for your hugs and kind words 💛💛💛💛. I feel like crap and it’s hard to get anything done it takes extra extra focus to get anything done ….. it’s like the worst pain of my life and I’m so worried about my mental state when he does go home to the Lord. I feel the trama from losing my mom at just 23 and missing out on so many things with her because she was diagnosed with dementia when I was just 14 it’s been a long road for me in those terms I’ve watched them both fade away ☹️. Instead of one black hole for my mom I’ll have two …… it’s very hard ….. thank you all for always being their for me back in 2020 I was so stressed out and exhausted and didn’t know what to do but I posted my question and 17 angels (you guys) came and told me what to do I’ll never forget that all of a sudden I didn’t feel so lonely anymore their were a ton of me in the world . Thank you 💛💛💛💛

Madisoncuckoo7 Jul 2023
Huuuuge hug to you, this is such a difficult time. I hope you can care for yourself in small ways at least every day. A smoothie, kitten videos snuck in during breaks, an escapist book before you go to bed, dog walks and flowers.

There is no out with these situations, only through. Do whatever you need to accompany yourself down this wrenching road - including of course the well wishes from understanding strangers.

Another huge hug…

cwillie Jul 2023
I'm so sorry, losing a parent is one of the hardest things we'll ever have to face (((((hugs)))))

Tynagh Jul 2023
Hugs to you! It's not easy, but you have this! Take it a day at a time because you've done all the right things.

Isthisrealyreal Jul 2023
Great big warm hugs!!

May The Lord give you comfort, peace and strength for this season in life. May HE wrap you and dad in HIS loving arms and keep you both as you walk this path.

dextersmom Jul 2023
I'm so sorry that you're experiencing this. Please know that you are there with your dad and that time is something you will carry with you. Make use of the time you have left and make it meaningful!

Sending love and hugs.

97yroldmom Jul 2023
MariaVictoria
Sending you hugs and well wishes. Thinking about you and your dad this morning. Hoping you make good decisions for yourself and gain peace with this time of transition for your dad.

NeedHelpWithMom Jul 2023
Maria,

Sending many hugs your way today!

It’s really difficult to see our parents declining.

I was very close to my father too. I’m sure that your dad knows how much you love him.

Wishing you peace as you lovingly spend time with your dad.

Please know that we are here for you if you want to talk.

patpaul Jul 2023
Virtual hugs and well wishes. . My family will keep your father and family in our prayers.

AlvaDeer Jul 2023
Maria, sending you hugs and well wishes and your Dad as well. He is so lucky to have you, and to have relief and the comfort of good care. I so wish you well.

BarbBrooklyn Jul 2023
Maria (((hugs)))).

Most of us here are "fixers" by nature. Not trying to fix or cure seems unnatural somehow.

I'm so glad that your dad is doing well. Try to look at this not as giving up but giving dad some peace and relief from being poked and prodded.

Hopefully he still has quality time left for you to spend together.

Please give yourself time to rest and find some happy things to do between visits so you have something cheerful to talk about.

Unless dad is "actively dying" you shouldn't be ignoring the other parts of your life.

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