From Alvadeer Update: another spot of bother!

@Sunnygirl, thank you. As I said here earlier, I will be dead and gone for 6 months and still writing on AC. It's my worst (or BEST) addiction. Depends upon who you ask on any given day whether that's a good thing or not.

Had the PET SCAN today. Other than my own anxiety (ALWAYS knee-jerk off the charts ugly), creaky bones and muscles, and hard table, there were no problems with getting that. Easy peasy.

I have been warned by ONE WHO KNOWS that Ma Kaiser can have a nasty way of sending results out to you without a doctor to lovingly explain that you haven't long for this world, and so not to open results on tests until ready to look. As N. and I meet with "the whole team" on Tuesday it is one we will wait until Monday to open if we have a choice. I do not myself like the look, feel, or rapidity of this spawn of the Alien; I knew last year with the mother tumor, as soon as I felt her. I don't like the kids any better. In fact I like them a whole lot LESS. We know already they are invasive cancer, and we know they are rapid spreading. Just don't know if they have got off home base of the breast. The PET scan may help to determine that.

Meanwhile on we go and I so appreciate your loving support.
To the regulars here, two people here have my beloved's phone contact. I won't, like Need, be gone without a word. I wouldn't want anyone wondering "What happened to that old bat Olga? Was THAT her name? Iva? Now what WAS her name!?"

I think there must be prayers out there for the atheist? Because at one point, given the nerve and neck radiculopathy I have, the hands clasped back in back of the neck and raised overhead was so painful while on that rather hard slab, that my arm began to twitch and nerves to zing. I thought "I am not certain how much longer I can last." Then I said to myself "Their Lord hung on the CROSS from NAILS, but YOU think you can't keep your hands over your head another minute? Are you KIDDING me". And I "hung in" there. Hee hee, y'all will make a "Christian" of me, yet?

Good move to wait for the meeting. Positive thoughts for you during that time. Your sense of humor serves you well.

Alva, I am sorry to hear this.

May The Lord give you strength, peace and complete healing.

@RR, I appreciate you, and especially your support.

@Sunnygirl, my sense of humor has always been dry and ironic in nature. I am afraid it has been little appreciated, hee hee. I have never meant it to be anti-life or anit-humanity, but it has often come over as such. But I mean life! It is all so BIZARRE! What in the world is one to say? So I am glad you are happy with it!! It's an acquired taste that many never choose to acquire.

Hi Alva, I’m so sorry to hear about the recurrence so quickly and triple negative to boot. Are you in California? I know you have your exit plans all lined up. Can you make the decision to do MAID on short notice? As someone with MBC for over 3 years (ER+) who was disqualified from surgery (de novo stage 4 ILC), I have to say that the path is unpredictable and I hope you feel you have the flexibility to hang out a bit longer, no matter what the prognosis, as long as you are still having good QOL.

Sorry that the alien is back. Sending wishes for you to kick that alien's butt.

ShirleyDot,
Yes, Shirley Dot, definitely hanging on while QOL is good! Never fear.
Thanks for your note...........If this is metastatic as well as invasive in the breast, I would do MAiD asap when OUL went south or for any movement toward brain. But asap means 6 month prognosis. So I would await that if I felt safe to. There is otherwise the other methods FEN and others can help with. I feel remarkably good for all that is apparently cooking up in there. I will know where I stand more with the Medical/surgical/pathology/oncology meet on Tuesday. I will update here, as they will discuss the PET scan done yesterday. I will hope to be able to "manage" things well; but life is, as we know, full of monkey wrenches to throw into the works.

I won't be fighting this out with anything such as node testing, chemo, radiation, etc. I am ready to go. I would do that when circumstances seemed right to ME for right reasons, and given I could get my MAiD or do other methods.
All at Kaiser have known my wishes many years. Wishes are known. As I laugh, my polst is so old it's dusty from hanging inside the cabinet door, hee hee.

I fought cancer nearly forty years ago and that battle gave me 38 years of very happy life. I feel VERY lucky indeed. I made happy use of that four decades, and I have no taste at all for old age. As an old retired RN I know what it brings, and it's NOTHING good. My grandchildren are grown and approaching their thirties. None have GREAT grandchildren on the way and I am not all that into babies anyway (sorry). I am good with passing the torch.

Will keep everyone updated. A mastectomy is tentatively on the chart for April 21. But we will see what Tuesday's meetup with N. and me has to say. I will update.

Alva, I want to thank you for all I've learned from you, and all your caring, and sharing your childhood memories with us.

But, what I really wanted to say, my point of this post is, my biggest thank you is for sharing this part of your life with us now, sharing your procedures, your steps, and your wishes. I am honored to be apart of this journey with you. This is an educational experience, that I really didn't want , but much needed education for all of us. You are not alone! 🙏🥰💓

Alva, you are the best! Rooting for you, always! 😊

Hello Alva, as with others, very sorry to hear you have more unpleasant news to deal with. Please know your weird sense of humor has been 'just what the doctor ordered' for many of us. You tell it like it is and no sugar-coating....too much sugar apparently not a good idea anyway. Someone by name of KPWCSC suggested Caring Bridges. It is quite useful in terms of not having to repeat yourself. However they are not the small outfit of some years ago, meaning frequent pleas for funds to continue.
You have also given me some very insightful advice as I dealt with Alzheimers and passing of my sister and now, unfortunately, about to start another chapter of same with DH. I know how to read test results but asked for face-to-face session with doctor to present them. DH needs to hear directly.

Hey Alva. Just popped on the site for first time in awhile and saw your post. I know you got this covered and will persevere. Sending you all my good vibes.

UPDATE:
When I wrote my lovely woman surgeon that the few "pimples on my skin" that just tested positive as the dread triple-negative cancer were kind of spreading on the underside of my breast like a California grassfire she took me in emergently for surgery on March 31st. I had been on schedule for April 21.
All at Kaiser were wonderful, and I am inundated with their care. Truly, you get into Ma Kaiser's hands with this stuff she will swamp you with kindness in both N.'s and my experience for two decades!

Surgery was an add, on so late in the day when N. got me home. My poor young doctor had a case "that went longer" already, and didn't leave hospital from 7 a. to 7 p. and I don't know how anyone does that!

I Spent most of yesterday emptying drains. A gorgeous incision, and I am finally flat. They inject some nerve blockers now and I am not in pain overall. Though I am pretty pain-tolerant (if a total coward).
I kind of hated being a Uni. You know how they say no one notices old people? They do if you only have one breast. And I refused to foob in most instances, soooooo, I have caused no little consternation.
Now they will just think I am a boy, given my propensity to be in blue jeans. Well, maybe more and old man. I am going to be so happy with my flat chest for the duration. It was kind of a Picasso drawing and now it's all evened up!

Golly, I love anesthesia. Anyone else? I could live the remainder of my life quite happy under anesthesia!

As you all know, I have no intensions of any chemo anymore. Dr. L. trying, however, to talk me into at least LISTENING to the radiation guy, given that this hasn't yet spread per PET scan. She wants me to try for some more years in the garden.
So I WILL listen to their stats, benefits and side effects in phone appointment tomorrow......today actually, because here I am up at 2 in the a.m. because I napped too much yesterday.

I couldn't have better support both medical and family, and I am basking in it, and healing up, and I thank all for your good thoughts. They truly mean so very much. And I MEAN that. A.

Alva, I'm so glad to wake up to good news!🙂‍↕️💖 ☺️ 🥹

Take good care of yourself, ❣️

Wonderful news . 😊😊😊👍🏻🤞🏻🙏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
Rest up .

Yes, Anesthesia is the best sleep I’ve ever had . I love it too.

Good to know about the anesthesia, I've never had it, now it scares the crap outta me, a little less

Praying for continued healing and that the "Alien" was gotten once and for all, and that he/she won't dare show their ugly head ever again.
I'm grateful along with you that your surgeon was able to get you in sooner than later, and that everything went well.

Alva, you (and Michael Jackson) loves you some Propofol ;-) Glad you are having such an awesome experience with Kaiser. May you receive complete healing or no return of the c for many more years. Wishing you a speedy recovery!

So happy for your update! Glad you got it over with instead of having to wait until the 21st, and that you’re getting such good care! I’ve missed your spot on advice to everyone. And your humorous way of seeing things! Sending good thoughts your way… good job Ripley hehe!

Life is like a box of chocolates, and you just got the caramel nut, with a clean PET scan and successful surgery.

Now, listen to the radiation options carefully, keeping TJ chips, pizza and family who love you in mind.

Glad you persevered through this ordeal, you old bat 🤣

O I had no idea! I know you and your advice/opinions mean so much to all of us. Hugs and good thoughts go out to you!

I’m glad to see that update. It sounds like it went smoothly and you got some rest, which is good. You seem confident in what you want or don’t want, but it’s wise to listen to options, which you have chosen to do. The decision you make is the right one. Sending healing thoughts your way,

Welcome back to the forum!

I waited up for you last night and now I see why we didn’t hear anything. So glad it is gone, gone, gone or at least off, off, off.

I agree with the idea to listen closely to those you have so much faith in.

Remember as women (I think we still have this right) we get to change our minds.

No need to rush the queue. I just heard that we boomers are passing at two a minute but there are many of us to process so take your time.
They will get to all of us soon enough.

Besides, I think you are still having fun.

So, so, so happy for this update Alva! Truly amazing your surgeon got you in so quickly. I do hope you'll consider radiation if that's what is recommended. My step-daughter had lumpectomy in one breast, then another in the other one several years later. She did the recommended radiation, and did very well with it, albeit with some localized "sunburn" and systemic fatigue. Of course she is 20+ years younger than you, so that may make a big difference in terms of reactions.

Alca, good grief cancer sucks! There I said it, cancer sucks! I hope there is a way you can get some non-invasive treatment as I remember from your posts, and I don't blame you, the whole chemo/radiation is a no way thing. At least you are getting some surgery and hopefully that can clear most of it up

Praying all goes as well as it possibly can for you. Praying for miracle.

UPDATE FROM ALVA:
Here's the skivvy. Healing amazingly well. Post op appt with surgeon is on Tuesday. I LOVE LOVE LOVE flat.

I endured an almost one hour call from a BRILLIANT doctor in Kaiser's new Oyster Point radiology center. I mean brilliant. With all the information and options flooding out of him. BUT he was like an A.I. machine--something almost entirely without humanity, and when he tried for it it came off a bit funny. ANYWAY, long and short of it is that you are truly at this point seen as a "CANCER", and they are ready to throw the flamethrowers into the fray. I understand that. A part of me even appreciates it. But they have no time for your long boring turn of who you are and what you want.

After working through that HERE IS THE PLAN: (I know, cut to the chase).
A) healing up the surgery.
B) Intake into the radiaology system with special scans and measurements and breath-holding instructions and etc. Tentatively scheduled for the week of 28th April.
C) Early may is a total of 16 sessions, three weeks on weekdays plus one day.

Reasons to do this given my not wanting to fight too hard?
Good question.
1. The PET scan is clear. Indicating while this GRASS FIRE was all OVER that breast including skin involvement, it is not YET in my system headed to its favorite nesting places of brain, bone, skin, lung, ovaries, et al.
2. It WAS in the skin. No one wants skin cancers on the breast. They cost a fortune in dressing and the wounds are something I have witnessed and you don't ever want to. Think of gangrenous let. That would lead to my early exit and I know all the exit doors. The BEST way to prevent spread to skin is to hire on Riley from The Alien and have her aim the blow torch at left chest wall and nodes under left arm. Takes up my stats (which of course mean not much) from 75% likelihood of return to 85% chance of NOT returning; that is just A.I. crap for certain; it will be what it will and every study says something different).
3. I am strong, hale, hearty, walking doing and etc. and in their minds I am a big baby if I won't take this one change for a few more quality years, etc etc but said in a very much nicer way. They aren't as brutal as Alva. And it is a sort of "If you won't DO this then you pretty much don't WANT to live and you're off our plate". I understand and I deal very well with ''truth" when it's leveled at me, because I level my own on so many others. A.I. Doc is all but "If you don't want ME I washing my hands of you, and good riddance". Ha ha.

So decision was mine. And with the sores on the breast the prime imperative to AVOID I will go for it, and take my cowardly little self in for those treatment. It is worth the try.

Side effects and fears:
1. 10% or less chance of lymphedema left arm; buy a pretty sleeve if you need it. Less likely with my height, weight, activity, and nodes not taken.
2. This is my LEFT breast. Yes, folks, we may be flaming out the Alien's spawn but that's right where my heart, lung and major vessels are. I already HAVE ASHD for many years (arteriosclerotic heart--read plaque, not on your teeth, but on your heart and vessels). And I am 82. So yes, this may be taxing. Unlikely but could.
3. Won't even bother you with the miniscule other littles, from burns to blisters to he has this special formula, vitamin D and he believes. (He really IS quite something.)

So. That's the plan. More of a fight than I wanted to make, but if the breast breaks out it means an earlier cashing in of the chips. This is worth the time, the trouble, and taking my cowardly little heart off for 16 days out of my life. Given how fast time passes at my age it will be over with in 15 minutes.
And you know I will make YOU go through every SECOND of it.

I'm glad to hear that you opted for some treatments anyway, and we all look forward to taking this journey with you and cheering you on from afar.
Praying for God's peace and comfort as you travel this road that you didn't necessarily want to travel. But you've got this girl!!!

Alva, I believe you are doing the right thing here. A month of discomfort, you can take!! We will be your cheerleader 🤸📢💪 ☺️ ❤️

(((((Alva))))) Great results and great choice to proceed with radiation treatment. It's localized so the chances of eradicating it are high. It's wonderful that you are so active still gardening and so on. More power to you. Prayers are being answered. I have an total peace about this. The results didn't surprise me. God has plans for you and I believe he is not done with you yet. Miracles do happen. The immediate road ahead may be a bit bumpy, but I believe it will even out. Prayers for fast healing, and a smooth ride.

So glad that PET came up empty! Woo hoo!
Now you knew the two other concerns...the possible spread, and get it OUT.

It is OUT. Removed, The Dr. has a solid, workable game plan. If you weren't a nurse, the spread would have gotten past rescue stage. Timing is everything!

The rest will be easy...you bought some more years. Now the travel and recovery (and related discomfort) will be the hassle. Great numbers, too! 85% is huge!Take the time off to focus on yourself. You have a great Dr, who has scientific determination. Show him he's met his match!

Yesterday the Bay Area was covered with white, fluffy clouds...after some short showers. It was glorious outside. I had a feeling you'd be OK. Everything has been laid out. I'm sure your Dr. is thrilled to have a nurse patient, who gets it.

He can focus on his expertise in problem solving. You will make it easy!

This is a reminder for all of us out there to get our mammograms, we aren't too old for them. I did mine in December, it came up empty. Radiation focuses on precise, specific areas, whereas chemo is similar to drinking nuclear waste.

YOU GOT THIS! So does your Dr. and arrogant ones don't play. They succeed.