Follow
Share
Read More
@Dawn, Kaiser SF for me.
I won't be doing any big cancer journey at 83. My journey now if more looking ahead to MAiD. Had my first mastectomy in '87. Had some GREAT years cancer free since then, until it caught the second breast a year ago.
I wanted to go directly to FLAT, but it was suggested, age and all, we did lumpectomy with wide margins. I have declined node testing, radiation, treatment (with this a triple negative, it's unlikely that would have done a thing but relieved me of what little hair I have left).

All at Kaiser here are a marvelous team. They fully understand my wishes and did since last year's lumpectomy. Those were/are:
1. If it spreads into the breast, go with full mastectomy (that's now scheduled for April 1st tentatively dependent the PET doesn't show it "everywhere".)
2. If spread then we will allow it to do it's worst, monitoring it for symptoms and with the palliative care team. Go for the good drugs while I am comfortable "enough".
3. If I get the magical "6 months" prognosis at any point I can go for the MAiD laws I worked so hard to promote. You may know the process. You speak with psychologist; your team says these have been your wishes always, etc. etc. I will be assisted with that in the Kaiser system.

My goal is to contain. If no containment then take my final exit as quickly, painlessly, and with as little muss and fuss as can be achieved. My family all aware and supportive. And strong.

It has always has been my wish to pre-deceed my guy. It would be awful dealing with end of life without him; I am well ready"to go" if going I am. I have always been, as an old RN, a bit of a death junkie. Not afraid of death, only of mess and only of pain and only of torment for family. I am hale, hearty, walk, garden, do a ton of stuff. That's the quality of life I want. When I can't have it I am ready to relieve the taxpayer of paying out SS to someone past her sell-by-date.

I am good. Let's say I am as good as I can be given my normal anxiety. I hate tests. I hate the whole routines. I hate being in scanners. I hate being inundated with calls. I get claustrophobic. I hate "waiting rooms" where you sit until you get the facts. I fear the unknown. All that stuff. And I am in for a full month of that. Coward that I am I shall simply have to MAN UP . as Geo. Bush said.

Thank you for your offer of help; it is incredibly kind, but until you take your Death Doula training, I can decline. (God I would have been GREAT at that).
(4)
Report

@Iggy, I wished a long time to go flat. So I finally get my wish. Like so many wishes, it comes loaded with other crap, hee hee!
(1)
Report

Oh honey, you'll need to get yourself a new fabulous scarf or earrings to wear after this round of Tales from the Breasts is done.

Positive vibes to you!
(2)
Report

Alva, sending positive thoughts and love your way. I absolutely LOVE the Alien movies too! And I’m picturing you as Ripley. Ripley was strong, resilient, intelligent and had unwavering determination... And a total bad a** and hero!!! Take your flamethrower with you today 😉
(3)
Report

Alva,

We are with you.
(4)
Report

Sorry to hear this. Glad you love your surgeon and I hope that f*cking PET is dark as midnight.

Which Kaiser for surgery?
I'm in the East Bay in Dublin if you need an Atheist bi***h handy. Will you come to the new Kaiser Hospital Cancer Center in Dublin? I'm 5 minutes away.
Defcon 5, one day at a time. Sending strength across the Bay right now.
(2)
Report

Sending prayers, Alva.
(2)
Report

Alva, I just figured this alien HAD to be a male to be causing so much trouble.
(4)
Report

Hang in there LADY!
(3)
Report

@FunkyGrandma, clearly you and I need a box of popcorn and a few beers, and a review of Alien Movies. The Alien was a GIRL. That's why she was always making those clattering little nasty babies that were bursting out of everyone's chests! I rewatched the entire series last I had a bout with this--well, as Ripley (Lt. Ellen Louise Ripley, as played by Sigourney Weaver) called her "Get away from the KID you 'b-t-h'"!!!!!!
I am afraid in this case I will have to give her the breast. I wouldn't want to let her take the kid, however.
(4)
Report

(((Alva)))
(2)
Report

Thinking of you, positive vibes are with you! Kill that alien once and for all...enough already!
(5)
Report

💭😔💔🙏🤗
(4)
Report

How dare that SOB Alien rear it's ugly head again!!! Does he not know who he's messing with?
But I like Lealonnie, believe in miracles as well, along with the power of prayer too, so I will keep you lifted up before the God of the universe's throne.
(3)
Report

Well…ugh…sorry you’re staring this down again. Definitely sending you the best of hopes
(3)
Report

Miracles DO happen and I'm proof of that, my dear friend. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers daily as you fight thru this beast with the grace and strength you've come to show us all.
(8)
Report

Not another round of this !!
Sorry to hear that .

Sending support your way .
(5)
Report

Alvadeer, I, as well , everyone here, I'm sure will keep you in are thoughts, pray and soul. 🫂♥️🫂♥️
(4)
Report

Thoughts in agreement, ditto what Geaton said.

If that wasn't short enough, I am committed to go for a mammogram appointment in April, after avoiding it for so many years.

Thanks Alvadeer.
(6)
Report

Alva... well, not the update we all wanted to read.

Fight on, girl, and we will be supporting you, thinking about you and praying for you and your LOs.

May you receive supernatural healing and the peace that transcends understanding.
(8)
Report

Start a Discussion
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter