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I now know what the inside of a psych ward is like...literally.

Thank you for all your prayers and thoughts. I will check in now and then...it has all gotten to be just too much for me...

Miss Everyone....Jen
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Juju: Hanging would be too good for some of those docs your mom has to depend on. Just saying.
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Good to hear from you Cat,

Jen Jen Hope your hanging in there! I miss your stuff!!
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TIred, Thurs happened to be ma's routine GP follow up on leg and I insisted we investigate more got them to finally find the problem she had a spriral fracture of the Tibia had to bring her back to Ortho today to get this takin care of once n for all!!! 15 day with a broken leg not being treated!!! I could just scream but she has been so wonderful she Is my inspiration!! I luv my mamma!!
Well we are home and she has a big purple barney foot! it will match the ALZ Assn walk/colors! she will be more comfortable now it is stabilized...a regular cast and we see how that does in three weeks if It bothers her or sores then a boot. she is a trooper and so glad it IS a cast just for safety it had been dragging around for 2 weeks it was 15 days I counted wrong, and turns out not the ankle as they told me a spiral fracture of the tibia...fortunately it seem to be same as xray on 2nd so wasn't made worse just the pain n treating with ice n braces the wrong area etc.....another long day but called ortho and told them they need to take her today or I will have to get her in n out of car with fracture too much...so they did I got her xray and cast, (skip spinting n find ortho next week,uhum) Cat...eyes roll!!! Anyway all taken care of in 1 last visit, 2hrs south so long day and hour north to pic up cd of xray from yesterday!

I will check in later with your week!
Peace,
Juju
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Sharynmarie: I didn't mean to leave you out. Hope you get rested up after a nine day work week. Maybe things will calm down now. O my gosh, maybe you will be a grandmother soon. I talked to my 92 year old aunt yesterday. She is so excited. Her grandson, who she loves to bits, and his wife have adopted a baby girl. They have been married 16 years and this baby is just a gift from God. My aunt decided to give them a baby shower. She was telling me all the plans for this Saturday's big happening. I can't believe she is doing all this at 92 years old. Even painted her back yard table and chairs for the event. Thirty people coming and she has done up name cards for everyone. Other people are helping with the food, but she is just all a buzz. When I called, she had just gotten home from having her nails done. Getting her hair done today.

Grandchildren are so special. Hope you get to enjoy a new addition soon, Sharyn. You take care and thanks for your good wishes.

Hugs,

Cat
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OK: Hopefully 3rd time is a charm. I wrote two long posts last night and lost them both.

Meanwhile: Give Omaha a hug for me. Glad he is feeling better. I want to tell you that I get cramps in my legs or toes sometimes at night. I bought some Magnesium...400 mg at the grocery store. I was shocked to find that it really helped me. Sleeping is much better. Oh, and I was having these little episodes of my heart pounding every night off and on. Hasn't happened once since I've been taking the Magnesium. Sometimes Potassium can help with legs also.

Bobbie: Thanks for the info. I'm looking into it and other things too. I made a "Veg. Garden Soup" the other day in the blender. I was able to choke most of it down, but no so with Hubby. Gonna have to work on that recipe, but I think I can improve it considerably.

OK: Update on Maggie, the malignant breast tumor. She was evicted this past Thursday (lumpectomy) and my surgeon called me a couple of days ago to say that she measured 7mm. Yes!!!!! That's small. The surgeon also took two lymph nodes closest to the tumor (sentinel nodes) and those came back clear. That is really good news. So now we go back to Seattle this Monday, meet with the surgeon for a post op appointment at 12:30pm and then with the medical oncologist at 1:30pm. We will get the scope on what the next step is in the process.

By the way, we probably all know that garlic is good for us. Here's something new that I learned. Before you use garlic, you should crush the clove...like in a garlic press....and let it sit for 10 minutes before you use it. This lets certain chemicals in the garlic release and mingle which is necessary for garlic to offer it's health benefits. Also, if you have frozen berries and if you let them thaw on the sink or in the fridge, they will lose about half of their nutritional value. If, however, you defrost them in the microwave, they retain all their nutrients. The long thawing time is what decreases the nutrients.

Well, I've had this musical loop going through my head all day. Rod Stewart: "Wake up Maggie I think I've got something to say to you." Ugh, I guess that's what I get for giving that mutant lump a name. May she rot in a petrea dish, that estrogen sucking malcontent.

I'm way behind the curve on posts and will try to catch up. From scanning, I can see that Juju is still battling all galactic forces single handedly. Lord, Juju, I hope things switch up for you and reinforcements....lots of them, come in to help you. Sending you white light and lots of hugs.

Jen seems to be MIA. Jen, sending you prayers to ease your burdens. Check in soon.

Deef, it would be good to hear from you. Diane, it would be good to hear from you too. I know you both have had "stuff" to deal with and it probably involves some family, but check in when you can.

Cuz, thanks for all the prayers. Keep em coming.

Mame is have a great time in Cape Cod. I see her posts on FB and the photos are awesome. She sure deserves a good break.

Bobbie: Take care on the boat. Hope Clankshaw the Destroyer (?) is in good form and has found some things to her liking at the new digs. Ok, I know I murdered her name, maybe even her gender. Remind me and also the other name she had, it was like first mate something or other. Love to hear about her antics.

Kuli, thanks for your prayers and encouragement.

Linda09, how are you doing. Thanks for the extra lives on Candy Crush.

LilDeb: So glad that your sweet Vera is better. What a relief. Now if you can just get the rain to stop. Stay dry my friend.

I'm going to post this before I lose it again.

Love you all,

Cattails
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I have just been lurking lately. Meanwhile~glad your horse got over the colic, a long night for you.
Bobbie~sounds like you had some fun with all you have been doing on the dock.
Juju~Hope you are getting some down time and mom is feeling better.
Where is Jen...I hope you are ok, we are all thinking about you!
LoonyTunes2~sound like you have your hands full but you came to the right place. Vent and live, share more when you are up to it.
Deef~Hope you are doing ok with all the changes you have to adjust to.

I have been working 8-9 days in row before I get a day off so the last two weeks have been busy. I wish I could say i was getting OT but not the case since the days overlap on pay period to another. My son finally confirmed with my last night the they will be here the first week of sept. YAY!! I was not able to visit him this spring with everything going on with mom, but now I will get to see my munchkin!!
The second week of sept. hubby and I will go to Idaho to visit our daughter and sil. I am excited to see both my kiddos and my daughter has stopped taking birth control so hopefully I will be a gramma sometime next year. Oh, the things I am planning for that and the shopping....I am in dream mode!!

Mom is well and sis and I will have dinner with her Friday. Sis is hesitant to visit her by herself as mom has been giving her hell, making scenes when sis does visit her so I will go as a buffer. I think sis tries to hard to get approval from mom and acceptance so it backfires on her everytime...sad for my sis but she has to learn to not please mom based on what pleases sis.
Hugs to everyone!!!
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My girlfriend and I are caring for Mom. Yeah, she's entering the gross stage. I'm thinking while I drink red wine why in college my professors wasted time with stuff like Freud making a boy scared of fuzzy things? It would have been more relevant to examine why there is so much enjoyment/concern about bodily functions among the elderly. Mom likes to talk often about her kitten watching her pee. If I had a dollar for everytime one of us said "I can't take it anymore" I'd be rich. When I'm in her shoes, I swear I'm paying an inept aide to kill me. Son, just bring this old woman some Heroin Okay? My luck I'd survive and find I painted my living space w/ poop and killed the inapt aide.
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Sure hope Deef gets to feeling better. It takes awhile, that is for sure. Jen, we are all worried.
I have been hiking up the back pasture (very steep), last 2 days. The dog loves getting to go with me. Haven't been able to do that since last April. Leg cramps last night, but foot was fine.
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Good Morning Crew,

lildeb, we are all still here, just crazy with this and that.

The Dockmaster and his wife have returned so we don't have to run the marina anymore. It was an interesting week and a half.
The owner is one of those who thinks that everyone should cater to him without him even saying thank you for efforts put forth. He is confused by the Boat Angel and me since we are not on his payroll and are not interested in listening to his bs. We only ran the dock for the dockmaster and his wife who are true sweethearts and had to be away for family drama.

Speaking of family drama, you guys have been through the wringer here! I have read all the posts but the details are swimming around between names.

Cat! How are you making out after the procedure? Did you look into any of the information that I posted? How are you feeling?

Cuz! Odds and Ends, now that works. How is Mike and everyone doing?

Jen! Where are you girl? Please post and let us know that you are ok. We are all worried sick.

I got an email from Deef last night and she is in the aftermath of caregiving where the insanity of the last 5 years catches up with you and you realize that you are empty.

Ted Update: Ted has Made It. After all of the Hell he went through with caregiving and his siblings, he has just arrived in his new home. He called me while waiting for a stromboli in his new little town where he is a scholarship student in his chosen field.
His future is bright and he is happy. Two years ago he was suicidal and overwhelmed with the dementia caregiving for his mom and bewildered with the criminal treatment he was getting from his sibs.
The take away for all of us is that there is a life after caregiving and we have to know that 'this too will pass' and carry on.

Juju! You are dealing with way too much but of course you already know that. Keep venting and griping and writing it out.
I caught that link before it was removed and watched that CBS story. It is a crime and all I can say is that there are good places but it is incumbent on the family to make sure. Key is caregiver to patient ratio. 3 to 1 is good. Also, watch out for places that take anyone to be a caregiver. One of the things that was going on in NJ is that they would arrest someone on a drug charge, put them through employment training without drug counseling and 6 weeks later a 'dry' addict (look it up-dangerous condition) would be caring for grandma. Now add the stress of a dementia patient and you have classic elder abuse and worse. Terrible.

When I got mom a good place in Los Angeles I found a board and care home that had a 3 to 1 ratio and the women who were caregivers were Mongolian. Their culture is to revere the elderly and my mom was cared for well even though she could be difficult (as any dementia patient can be). I had to place her because the stress of caregiving was killing me. This thread has all of that written out in the 27,000+ posts.
My survival instincts won out and I had to accept that it was going to be her or me. Just is.
The bad situation in NJ was one of the reasons I moved us to my apartment in CA because I knew that I would find better care options. Sadly, better care options are not available in most of this country and caregivers are terrified to place parents because of the horrors portrayed in the piece that Juju pointed us to.
Mom was only in respite for 10 weeks and I needed that in order to live. Fair is fair.

Meanwhile! Glad that horse is feeling better and how are you and Indio? How's the foot feeling?

OK, I know I have more shout outs but have to go to Home Depot for some boat materials before it gets too stupid hot. Heat Index was 112 degrees yesterday.

On the lighter side, I finally shaved my legs. Only have about 15 hairs between the two but they tickle me when the wind blows...... I know you guys just had to hear that one.

Jen! Not kidding!! Please check in even though you are too shot out to write much.
Jen, thinkoftheboatthinkoftheboat....... It will end and you will survive this. You can do it. You have us to gripe to and cry to. One day you and me and maybe Deef and who knows else will sit in the big old cockpit of this trawler and laugh ourselves silly about sh!t that has nothing to do with old people and their crap. I swear Jen.

Love you guys way more than you'll ever know.

lovbob
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M-glad Omaha got better, I meant to ask how was doing, that cracked me up, Maalox...but I am no horse person, you know what I your doing!!
Thanks for the support.
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Juju, so sorry about your Mom. She sounds so frail, I think I would be afraid to get her out of bed. Don't know how you manage so much.
Omaha was better pretty quick after the malox. Seems fine today. Don't know what precipitated the colic. Suspect it is his teeth. He is getting his 4 year old and his 5 year old teeth all at once.
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Well RN n I think mom is ok, no apparent additional pain or bruising or any symptoms. I did express my displeasure with bather turning her back on ma, they agreed was wrong but im tired of fighting everyone n we dodged a bullet with that one! so will let it go!
Peace and love to my very special crew!
Juju
Peace,
Juju
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Juju, I agree with Assandache. This is part of what this site is all about, expression your feelings so don't feel bad. Besides, I would be pretty f-ing mad if that had happen to my mil! I don’t understand why she didn’t ask for help from you? I too try to have everything ready for the bath day but sometimes we have so much to do n not to mention a little break just to breathe every now n then. Hopefully your mom will be alright n it’s just a bruise n nothing broken or ruptured. Of course, bruises can be real painful too. I would be going out of my mind if all that happen too. Vent away girl!
Cuz, at least they finally agreed on the name. I kind of like some of the other ones. My stomach dr has on his card, “The Gut and Butt Dr.” I like to fell out when I read it but so true. If u think about it, U just gotta have a sense of humor. I hope u r doing well?
Meanwhile, Do u know what may have caused him to get a belly ache? I know the feeling of being up late n walking a horse to keep them from laying down n twisting their intestines. Ours would get it if they dropped some of their feed on the ground on the dirt n start eating it. I hope Omaha gets to feeling better soon.
Used2bhapi, not sure why they do that or maybe when u mention she wet she just got to double check? At least she not grabbing turds out of the toilet bowl n squishing them between her fingers n in her fingernails to let me know that she is not constipated. My mil is not on diapers yet for she can still get around a bit on her own. Lord help me when that time comes. Can u just let her know that u r going to change her n not mention the poo or pee n see what happens? Hang in there n good luck. Oops! Go knock on some wood. : )
Ladydee, Bobbie Cat, where r u gals? I hope everyone is alright n just taking a break or getting some much needed rest.
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That used to happen with momma...she used to always have to see if she is wet even I told her she would have to touch it then would not believe me as the waterproof or one way liner thing would wick the moisture away from surface..she never did it with a BM as you pointed out visible! My thought is that she/they do not comprehend or accept that they are incontentent on some level, idk.... Very Gross... I am blessed that she does not find her poop a source of entertainment or art, yet!!! she will spit and smear food or mucous but no poop so far...knock on wood....she had put her hand in it unawarely couple times when a mess is had!

I hope she may get past that I don't know what else to offer other than ick I feel for ya that would totally gross me out...my BFF nana used to eat it bbbaaarrrfffffss!!!
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Why does mom reach for soiled diapers? She has to touch them no matter if it's urine or BM. This is gross! Anyone else dealing with this? Moms mind is sharp as a tack! Why does she have to "feel" for herself when I've told her she's wet? And the BM you can see with your eyes so that really grosses me out!
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Oh Juju I read your post and it made me cry, your poor mother. I hope nothing is broken. Give her a hug and the aide a kick in the arse.
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cuz, I just don't know...home health has been my only support so far, I do not wish to burn my last bridge of sane advice with momma care...but I am beside myself again this morning. They are proffessionals, should have gathered everything first and then started bath. previously I had been preparing it all for her the morning of so not to be running round last minute etc...but we are off in our routine here didn't even realize I hadn't prepped everything for her, she was used to that but in hindsight that Is her job....I don't know what to do about it as I need them....I would love to hold someone accountable for such an error tho, I have bigger fish to fry tho with the MD's and SSvc that have put us in this situation in the beginning. I am venting again and just wish for it to end....the bad stuff as I do not like being a nag and negative it goes against my morals but I can find no other way to cope with this relentless preventable issue after issue....idk just ignore me, lol!!!

Lildeb, I think I drove everyone crazy/away or that is my "its all about me mind working its twisted magic" I just don't like this me, I want the happy and hopeful me to win this battle....

Well boatcrew wherever you are, Love and peace to you all, you are my angels!

Juju
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Where did everyone go?
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Juju can you file charges against the health bather or that is not an option.
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Whats he got something stuck that doesn't want out yet?
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my head is going to explode, moms home health bather left her unattended to get clothes and supplies and she went over backward in the tub...bruised her arm bad and as a lot of her other stuff wont be till tomoro till I hear and see the pain and bruising, she landed her head and shoulders smacking the tub pretty hard I heard it from other room. I cant believe this shit, she is a toothpicks and could have fractured a shoulder or god knows what.... they are sending RN in am to evaluate her. she seems ok for now but tomoro will tell she did cryout when I readjusted her in the chair ( under arms) I just don't know what else can go wrong here but trying to stay positive that she is ok and nothing broken or fractured. today I got chart notes from Ortho last week and that sent me into a state of livid I have not felt in a while... I just don't know where to turn to get proper care for her....and even the GP chart notes....it is we on different planets

I am going to flip out! literally if she cant get quality and dignified care!

PEace out my boat of hope!
Juju
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Sick horse. Omaha has a belly ache. Poured a bottle of malox down him, now have to spell sis in walking him around. May be a long night.
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Best friends graduating from medical school at the same time decided that in spite of two different specialties, they would open a practice together to
share office space and personnel.
Dr. Smith was the psychiatrist and Dr. Jones was the proctologist; they put up a sign reading: Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones: Hysterias and Posteriors.
The town council was livid and insisted they change it.
The docs changed it to read: Schizoids and Hemorrhoids. This was also not acceptable so they again changed the sign to read Catatonics and High Colonics
- no go. Next they tried Manic Depressives and Anal Retentives - thumbs down again.
Then came Minds and Behinds - still no good. Another attempt resulted in Lost Souls and Butt Holes - unacceptable again! So they tried Nuts and Butts -
no way. Freaks and Cheeks - still no good. Loons and Moons - forget it. Almost at their wit's end, the docs finally came up with:
Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones - Specializing in Odds and Ends. Everybody loved it
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Thanks M...ya i had a tarp over the leak but when adjuster came out we peeled it back to look at area and i did not even occur to me till storm was in full rage!!
I am up now too, had a pina colada earlier like 6ish and it knocked me out now i am wide awake, eerrrrrr!! I have wanted to make jam or can some of these blackberrys abundant everywhere here...i have never done but ma was amazing at all that stuff...we had peach n apricot tree and she canned p. and made Amazing A. jam. I wish i had the time for that and knowledge moreso!
Well midnite snak since she/we awake now and get momma to bed.
Have a great week y'all!!
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Juju, hope you and the house weathered the storm.
Busy Sunday here. Mowed the grass, cleaned house, canned tomatoes and apples. Now I'm too wound up to go to bed.
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Just a hello and a happy Sunday to the thread that saved my life!!
Hope you all are doing well...i love you more that i can ever say

We had a wicked nasty storm scared the patooty outta me. Thunder like i have never heard shook building and rattled windows...seriously thought they were gonna break. Not good for the hole in the roof off to check on the house and how it fared, with stuff from construction in yard and roof etc...probably a soaking mess in bathroom but already a mess in their on floor so anyway

Have a great day as possible Happy Sunday and hang in there!!!

Peace out,
Juju
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I am doing the ALZ Assn walk for the cure...please visit this site and donate a couple bucks to help in this effort we would like to have a decent showing this year "https://act.alz.org/site/Donation2?idb=4864333&df_id=16186&FR_ID=3848&PROXY_ID=6727984&PROXY_TYPE=20&16186.donation=form1&JServSessionIdr004=28xtipufo1.app206b&s_subsrc=bfgetwordout&s_src=boundlessfundraising"
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Well the link was removed from my post
"this is why I do what I do"
but you can find the story at CBS evening news website...a study on nursing homes quality rating and abuse in them!!
It is why I keep mom at home with me..it is why I do what I do..horrific treatment of those who cannot speak up or fend for themselves!
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This is horrific and why I do what I do!!! Maybe we should move to Hawaii!
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