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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Thanks Bobbie......got to play golf today for the first time in a VERY long time. It was a very good day just to be out and not think about drs. appts. or hospice, etc. Tomorrow back to reality but yes, a good day today and back atcha ya and to everyone else. Pray for you guys everyday.
Happy you are writing Jen! Thanks for being happy for me. This has been long overdue. Trying to heal my poor liver after the insanity of the antibiotics for the C-Diff and the previous 15 years of caregiving and crazy. Finally, and you summed it up, all I have to care for right now is myself.
Good Morning, I have been in the Berkshires at a natural healing retreat for the last week and a half. Feel so much better than I did even a week ago. I have been wanting to come here for over 20 years and finally made it. After last year with all of the health issues I had I figured it was now or never.
Jen! hope you can find some joy somewhere, in the garden, somewhere. Think of you every day.
Deef! Hope to see you soon!
Meanwhile, Cuz, Austin, gladimhere, juju, pargirl, leah, mame, and everyone, I hope you all have as good a day as you can.
Mom had such a bad coughing fit last night she peed her bed and pulled a muscle, and asked me to go with her to the nursing home to see her father. who of course was in a sh*t mood and crabbed about everything. Time to check for another UTI we told them when we left. Oh and found two more pills on the floor by his chair...Like I care. Mom got a fathers day card that had grandfather on it, as I will no longer give him cards she is covering the poor old perverts cards by singing them from us both. Jesus Ma, I mean really! Oh and she is worried about having coughed near him and made him sick. Not me, me she could care less about... I literally prayed out loud that God will just take him now, as we sat and watched the ravens and water feature at the $12,000 a month nursing home... I feel like I could just puke from all this. It is just enough! When will he just fing die!? Have a decent week everyone, How ever you come by it! Jen
Yes, she's on medication, although I'm not sure of all the particulars. Her DIL puts out the pills and I give them to great-aunt Y with her meals. She's always been difficult, from what I hear, but of course most of the gross things are products of the dementia (such as, she would never have dreamed of taking her false teeth out at the table). I'm not involved in taking her to the doctor (I sometimes go along to help her son when he takes her) or consulting with them. But right now we're just doing what we can for her; probably as she gets progressively worse they'll have no choice but to put her in a nursing home.
Thanks for clearing up Leah. But I still think she needs to be re-evaluated maybe by different dr. Is she on any medication? Has she always been a little like this or is this behavior something new with the dementia? I just got through taking care of my 4 yr old grandson today and I'm wiped out.....took care of my mom when she was still at home with her dementia 5 years ago. I was younger 5 yrs ago but it's still mentally draining and along the same lines. Trying to reason with 4 yr old or dementia person. Hang in there. I know it's hard.
I think we just taught dad how to use lysol wipes after his marmalade parties. I think i will teach hin again after the Later marmalade party....fixodent in hearing aids...teeth on the table again..but at least we Found this new set. Last mos teeth were flushed...well we are not sure. ..ok everyone carry on...enjoy this beautiful summer weather 💜💜
Jujubean, I can relate. We home caregivers are in a vulnerable position because we don't have the financial strength and respect that institutions have. I have my own nightmare going on that I will report about as soon as it is over. (My mother died three days ago.) It has to do with a nurse who took issue with my "alternative" (homeopathic / and very effective) methods of palliative care. Meanwhile, know that your Sunshine is now in a position to help you even more powerfully and effectively, and she is often hovering near your shoulder, determined to see that you keep hope in your heart. Take small steps, and the Way Will Open for you. Good Luck!
I'm a little confused Leah93......I know everyone can't afford AL but there is help out there for your GREAT Aunt. Are you the only one that has responsibility for her? If so, it sounds like she needs to have more help than what you can give her. This is going to sound horrible but even is she can't afford it she needs to be out of your home. She is mentally sick and it sounds like she needs a lot more help than what you can give her. Has she been evaluated by a psychologist or geriatric dr? I have been care giving for at least 10 years and as much as I love my mom and dad but that's my mom and dad. I can honestly say I wouldn't bring them here to live with me (they just wouldn't want that). My mom has Alz/dementia and my dad is almost 93. I had him here for 2 weeks before he passed out after surgery and had to go to rehab facility for a month. Work with a social worker and an elder attny to help you get her in the place she should be. Also, there are places she can go that are based on her income but the social worker can help with that. That's just my 2 cents worth. Good Luck and God Bless
I'm one of those squeamish people who doesn't like to talk about certain things. I'll just say that we try to keep all towels out of great-aunt Y's bathroom (there are two bathrooms, thank goodness) if we ever want to use those towels again; we get her food for her, and no one eats her leftovers.
She'll sit at the table and take her false teeth out. O.O
If ever we leave the fridge or cabinet unlocked she'll get into it and leave a trail of food. She digs into things like splenda and flour. Possibly the very worst thing she does, though, is this awful, awful hacking *thing* she does. It's not even coughing. It's like, you know, sometimes you've got something stuck in your throat and you have to cough it up? Well, she forces herself to do it, not just once in a while, but *all day* *every day*. If she's awake and not eating, you can pretty much expect to hear her hacking at regular intervals; and the sound isn't even the worst part. She'll hack up whatever bits of phlegm she can, spitting them into the trashcan or the sink or her napkin. The doctor said there's no reason for her to be doing this, it's just the dementia. Lately I've been giving her a washable plate instead of a paper plate because, after every meal, she was hoarding the *used* plates in her room to do crafts with, after wiping them off with a napkin. We tried telling her she could have clean, unused paper plates, but she got mad at us for not trusting her to clean the ones she had; as if she's that frugal. She's never been careful with money in her life, but now she's worried about wasting some paper plates? She also saves her used napkins and piles them in her room. I can go in there every day and come away with five or more napkins to throw away. I don't even touch her trash can; that thing is so nasty. Thankfully she empties it herself. I never go into her bathroom or bedroom without shoes on.
Went to a job fair today at the casino near my house...hopefully I will get a call back interview. I cant stand the loneliness in this house without my sunshine. Keep your fingers crossed!!!
On his third roommate...please let this be over soon...It is way too late to be sooner, as the out spoken (possibly Dementia issued) aunt keeps reminding us, "We all thought you'd be gone by now..." yes and some of us pray for it daily... Watering a lot, hosed my self off in the yard... take my fun where I can...Jen
It was entertainment night at the senior citizens' center. After the community sing along led by Alice at the piano, it was time for the star of the show- Claude the Hypnotist! Claude explained that he was going to put the whole audience into a trance. "Yes, each and every one of you and all at the same time." said Claude. The excited chatter dropped to silence as Claude carefully withdrew from his jacket pocket a beautiful antique gold pocket watch and chain. "I want you to keep your eyes on this watch" said Claude, holding the watch high for all to see. "It is a very special and valuable watch that has been in my family for six generations" said Claude. He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting, "Watch the watch --- Watch the watch ----Watch the watch." The audience became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth. The lights were twinkling as they were reflected from its gleaming surfaces. A hundred and fifty pairs of eyes followed the movements of the gently swaying watch. They were hypnotized. And then, suddenly, the chain broke!!! The beautiful watch fell to the stage and burst apart on impact" "SHIT" said Claude.
It took them three days to clean the Senior Citizens ' Center and Claude was never invited there again.
It is good to see your post again. I worried about you and prayed someday you would let us know how things were going. The last I heard you got the VA Aid & Attendance approved. Then you were gone. I am so sorry to hear about all you have been through and the passing of your Momma. So sad! Love & prayers
Juju! So sorry that your mom and your sunshine is gone! That is terrible what happened to you. I thought you could take your loved one to the hospital you wanted. Cuz is right, have to think of your health.
Terrible and losing your mom on top of it all. Juju, it's good to see you but what awful things you have been through. I am so sorry.
Thanks. I cant beleive she is not here anymore. I was going to get her once power on and then she is gone. I dont know what to do without her. I am so lost without my sunshine!!! It has been a couple weeks already but my firstchance to think as the lively county had go tten my estranged bro involved which turned this into the nitemare it is I just got internet on cell to work. I am absolutely heartbroken.
juju sorry for your loss. Now is the time to just think of yourself and what comes next. Your health is the main thing right now. Seek out what help maybe available to get you back on your feet. Hugs your way luvCuz.
juju that sounds like a nightmare! I am glad you are rallying, don't let them kill you! Do whatever you have to to be healthy. I am sorry you lost your Mom especially under such unfortunate circumstances! Thinking of you, hoping your path gets easier, somehow...Jen
I am lost without her and thing are just a mess. They wiped out all our money i had been working so hard to get ahead , to pay fostercare. I sold all my jewelry to get power n water and dont know what will happen next..preparing to live in my van I guess. It is a nitemare 4 mo's and more to come.
Hi all, I have been away due to means beyond my control. Arguing with 911 over which hospital we can take mom to back in feb. They locked me up where things went really bad, i blacked out there and woke up 3 weeks later really sick and injured badly then spent couple months hospitalised in process mom was sent to a random foster care where she died, the day i got out, in the care of strangers!
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Thanks for being happy for me. This has been long overdue.
Trying to heal my poor liver after the insanity of the antibiotics for the C-Diff and the previous 15 years of caregiving and crazy.
Finally, and you summed it up, all I have to care for right now is myself.
lovbob
Glad you got some time for yourself! Not boat, helpers, fam, business or BS!
Vera hot here....Stay safe and cool everyone...Jen
I have been in the Berkshires at a natural healing retreat for the last week and a half. Feel so much better than I did even a week ago. I have been wanting to come here for over 20 years and finally made it. After last year with all of the health issues I had I figured it was now or never.
Jen! hope you can find some joy somewhere, in the garden, somewhere. Think of you every day.
Deef! Hope to see you soon!
Meanwhile, Cuz, Austin, gladimhere, juju, pargirl, leah, mame, and everyone, I hope you all have as good a day as you can.
lovbob
I literally prayed out loud that God will just take him now, as we sat and watched the ravens and water feature at the $12,000 a month nursing home... I feel like I could just puke from all this. It is just enough! When will he just fing die!?
Have a decent week everyone, How ever you come by it! Jen
She's always been difficult, from what I hear, but of course most of the gross things are products of the dementia (such as, she would never have dreamed of taking her false teeth out at the table).
I'm not involved in taking her to the doctor (I sometimes go along to help her son when he takes her) or consulting with them. But right now we're just doing what we can for her; probably as she gets progressively worse they'll have no choice but to put her in a nursing home.
luvCuz
I'll just say that we try to keep all towels out of great-aunt Y's bathroom (there are two bathrooms, thank goodness) if we ever want to use those towels again; we get her food for her, and no one eats her leftovers.
She'll sit at the table and take her false teeth out. O.O
If ever we leave the fridge or cabinet unlocked she'll get into it and leave a trail of food. She digs into things like splenda and flour. Possibly the very worst thing she does, though, is this awful, awful hacking *thing* she does. It's not even coughing. It's like, you know, sometimes you've got something stuck in your throat and you have to cough it up? Well, she forces herself to do it, not just once in a while, but *all day* *every day*. If she's awake and not eating, you can pretty much expect to hear her hacking at regular intervals; and the sound isn't even the worst part. She'll hack up whatever bits of phlegm she can, spitting them into the trashcan or the sink or her napkin. The doctor said there's no reason for her to be doing this, it's just the dementia.
Lately I've been giving her a washable plate instead of a paper plate because, after every meal, she was hoarding the *used* plates in her room to do crafts with, after wiping them off with a napkin. We tried telling her she could have clean, unused paper plates, but she got mad at us for not trusting her to clean the ones she had; as if she's that frugal. She's never been careful with money in her life, but now she's worried about wasting some paper plates?
She also saves her used napkins and piles them in her room. I can go in there every day and come away with five or more napkins to throw away. I don't even touch her trash can; that thing is so nasty. Thankfully she empties it herself.
I never go into her bathroom or bedroom without shoes on.
Watering a lot, hosed my self off in the yard... take my fun where I can...Jen
It was entertainment night at the senior citizens' center.
After the community sing along led by Alice at the piano, it was time
for the star of the show- Claude the Hypnotist!
Claude explained that he was going to put the whole audience into a trance.
"Yes, each and every one of you and all at the same time." said Claude.
The excited chatter dropped to silence as Claude carefully withdrew from
his jacket pocket a beautiful antique gold pocket watch and chain.
"I want you to keep your eyes on this watch" said Claude, holding the
watch high for all to see.
"It is a very special and valuable watch that has been in my family for
six generations" said Claude.
He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly
chanting, "Watch the watch --- Watch the watch ----Watch the watch."
The audience became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth.
The lights were twinkling as they were reflected from its gleaming
surfaces.
A hundred and fifty pairs of eyes followed the movements of the gently
swaying watch.
They were hypnotized.
And then, suddenly, the chain broke!!!
The beautiful watch fell to the stage and burst apart on impact"
"SHIT" said Claude.
It took them three days to clean the Senior Citizens ' Center and Claude
was never invited there again.
So sorry that your mom and your sunshine is gone!
That is terrible what happened to you. I thought you could take your loved one to the hospital you wanted.
Cuz is right, have to think of your health.
Terrible and losing your mom on top of it all. Juju, it's good to see you but what awful things you have been through. I am so sorry.
lovbob
eww on the full view chew!
Vent and Live!
lovbob