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They're giving me an anti nausea along with the go go juice so that doesn't happen. This will be my 4th poop shooter so I am not looking forward to it but they found polyps and removed them on the first one in the early nineties so I am happy to be alive. Subsequent scopes have revealed no polyps and hopefully we continue the tradition with this test.
Mame! How did it go? (no pun intended)
Now that I'm not so severely sad after my mom and all the crazy that went with it I am on a campaign to get the medical tests and care I need in order to move forward in my life.
Jen said it best in a post on my wall: We are supposed to put our wants and needs last on the list in order to care for everyone else. We all end up paying for it, whether it's Cluster Headaches, Severe Depression, Heart Attacks, PTSD or whatever else manifests itself in our stressed out minds and bodies.
This May it will be 5 years since the passing of my mom and after many false starts where I thought that I was coming out of it I finally gave up and sought the help of doctors and counseling to get me right.
Oh cuz, that is a terrible thing to do to the word "Punch" gazza! Flavor options, I say take one you DON't LIKE. That way the experience (and it is an experience) will not ruin a favorite flavor for you! I kid you not. Phosphosoda anyone... bleah! I know Deef...I like to say it as often as possible. Mom won't tell anyone how much it is costing, but I say it out of spite and bitterness...Grandma would be sickened, truly! Hell, literally! The pain is unimaginable and when it hits it is all you can know...I understand pain reliever addition. I f I had any, I'd take them. Excedrin will have to do. Jen
bobbie I told the dr that that was and exit only but he just knocked me out and did it anyway. Didn't like the punch they gave to drink, got sick after a half gallon and cleaned out the top along with the bottom. luvCuz
Oh Jen, cluster headaches! Can't imagine the pain. 12,000 a month for G to live in the home is insane. Glad Spring is making an appearance and hopefully it will take your cluster headaches away.
Mame! Good luck on your South of the Border Inspection! The stuff to drink is awful but sure gets the job done. My appointment for this lovely experience is on the 30th this month. What kind of cool job did you get?
Hope everyone is seeing some good weather. The midwest has been hammered. Linda! Are you guys doing ok? Other than everything that you have had to deal with. The Hits just keep on Coming…
Meanwhile! Austin! DEEF!!
Think about you guys a lot and wonder how everyone is.
Still here, another trip to ER. A new fun fun for me...."Cluster Headache" My God, I think I'd really rather die! They were as usual rude to me so I was rude right back. I never asked for pain meds but did get anti nauseal med. Puking all over the house is just much too much for me! May take weeks to go away, lovely...G not dead yet. at $12,000 a month even mom is starting to wish he'd go now...She is making sure he gets the very best care possible and is always talking to nurses or aides about him, make sure they know someone loves him and wants him to be well looked after and to assuage the incredible guilt she feels for abandoning her beloved Daaaadddddeeee in to nursing care (which he apparently made my Grandmother swear she would never place him in) As_+&%e! Too bad old man! He is complaining they make him stand up now...Well the only other become bed ridden, you wanna go there, that will be a lot more work and bother for you and the staff old man! God when does this end? Almost did Monday. We had a green left hand turn lane...the white box truck had the red but just kept coming...." it was a near miss!...I was so depressed and out of it I hardly cared. Been well out of it what? No more worries...
been keeping busy, re screwed mom storm window in, making antimacassars for G old room furnishings, made curtain for back door window, to cover the metal mesh bolted into it (great neighborhood). Been very Springy weather cold warm cold warm wet dry wet dry...Probably need to mow NOW! But been fighting it. I did put on weed n feed so we are the only house with out Dandelions yet... Good luck and good news on the colonoscopy bobbie. prep always worse that procedure as far as that one is concerned! hope you get the all clear sign! Deef has the snow melted off there? any garden prep yet? Hope everyone is doing well and a nice balmy Spring is making it's way everywhere...Have a good rest of the week! Jen
Preparing for my first colonoscopy today! Ugh...I am hungry! Can't wait till it is overwith tomorrow! Have to start drinking the stuff in about 1/2 hour. Oh joy.
Things here are good. I have a part time, temp job. Feels good to be out in the workforce after 15 years of caregiving. Miss mom but I know she is partying up there with her brothers and her mom and dad. The sibs all came together for the funeral and a thank you note writing party about a week after. Mom would be happy.
Weather turning warmer! Makes everyone smile! Winter was tooo long this year. Hopefully the snow is done!!!
Hi Cuz, Good to hear that you guys are getting some maintenance done as well.
Today I have an appointment to set up a colonoscopy. Yup…. They're going to look up my old address….
This will be my fourth one over 25 years so that's ok. I know what to expect and don't look forward to drinking that gallon or so of nasty stuff that will polish my insides pink.
Hope Joyce isn't down too long with that foot surgery. Will be thinking positive thoughts for her.
Tell everyone I said hi and glad to hear is ok Aunt Hank and wish Mike's legs would get better.
We are both doing great bobbie here in Michigan. Joyce goes in for foot surgery on Wednesday to remove a cyst on the instep of her foot. She dropped a little bottle on it a couple of months ago and has had it drained twice but it keeps coming back. End of April I am having cataract surgery on my right eye and the middle of May the left eye. Mike is doing ok, his legs are getting worse but he is just dealing with it. Aunt Hank is doing fine also. Hope your maintenance goes well. Love you cuz
You all need to come to Texas. Brother....one day sleet/ice.....the next is 82 degrees, the next is everything budding out, the next 32 degrees with snow. Oh yes, let's not forget the 40 mile an hr. wind. No wonder I keep a drippy nose, watery eyes and sinus infection. I do hope all of you had a good Easter weekend though. Yesterday was 48 degrees, rain. Today is gorgeous and 82. But our church service made up for the crummy weather. God Bless. I keep all of you in my prayers.
Spring busy and worn out and several people I think in mourning too. May feel uncomfortable here. I am not sure when G dies how I will feel. Less allowed to grouse personally...? Not that that ever stopped me before... Raining here, another day I can hold off mowing the lawn, yes it is that bad! We may pay for our lack of true Winter weather in Summer?...
Speaking of smells. I was wrong, have had the windows open every day for a month, washed walls ceiling floors and pored bleach, where it was molding from pee and pee b gone....If you close the doors for any amount of time...the smell comes back...This will be a re paint and re finish the floors fix... beh, hope his stay at nursing home leaves enough money to pay for it!
Not any better on this end . I had a stroke effect in my left leg . Jesus I quit smoking . Went with Ecig . Hubby been waiting for bladder treatment few months maybe April he will have the treatment s . I'm kick in asses . Enjoy life while you can xoxo
No comfort to anyone but there was a cartoon in todays local paper and the tag line was. "Time to think about the garden the tools are begining to show out of the snow"
I am sending the sun fast as I can Deef, though you may hardly notice...I'd go bug house if I had that much to do...Hope they can get B stuff cleared away then have her settle in and less worries! Mom was just saying she is glad Grandma took care to give her POA and MPOA before they needed it!
Brother in law and sister arrived here yesterday evening. I'm exhausted and ready to end this as soon as possible! Been at B's 75-85 hours/week since she came home from rehab in mid February. Lawyer is coming to her house today to explain what they have to do with her very little assets so we can get her placed. Been on hold due to her son living in another state. The bank would not transfer funds etc. without him being here in person. So the placement has been on hold until he could come back and take care of things in person. I'm hoping everything can get straightened out as soon as possible. I'm completely fried! My house is a mess and in dire need of cleaning, etc.!!! Had to have fuel line and pump replaced on old furnace last week and was told the combustion chamber needs to be replaced before next winter, or a new furnace if possible! $8,000 I'm told, but the fuel consumption would be cut in half! So the furnace would pay for itself in 6 years. The old oil burner is now almost 50 years old, so not much sense in throwing more $$ into it, but I sure don't have $8000!!! Looks like the plumbing will be put off and I won"t get my shower in my apartment this year. Hoping to go through junk in the attic and cellar and get rid of a lifetime of saving. h Have to get her to the lab for blood work in an hour, then I have the rest of the day to myself! Bet I just sit and do nothing! Snow showers here all weekend and right now. Cloudy, cold and dreary. Still got close to 2 feet of snow on top of my garden and raspberries, but it's slowly melting away! Jen, I'm so jealous!! Hope you are all doing well! Deef
Just put weed and feed on the lawn here...hoping it is warming up in the East! Nothing major here.Found a book for G, a Sear's and Roebuck catalog from 1900's. Should keep him occupied. Same staffing issues at nursing home. but at least he knows not to try to get up to help him roommate anymore... Have a good May everyone! Jen
There is a medical distinction between “Guts” and “Balls”.
We've heard colleagues referring to people with “Guts”, or with “Balls”. Do they, however, know the difference between them? Here’s the official distinction; straight from the British Medical Journal: Volume 323; page 295.
GUTS - Is arriving home late, after a night out with the lads, being met by your wife with a broom,and having the “Guts” to ask: “Are you still cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?”
BALLS - Is coming home late after a night out with the lads, smelling of perfume and beer,lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the bum and having the “Balls” to say: 'You're next, Chubby.'
I trust this clears up any confusion.
Medically speaking, there is no difference in outcome; both are fatal.
Needanear.....Welcome. I agree you need to look at all options. Financial, legal, medical. From one person that loves her dad to another, take one step at a time but do it before it's too late. If you feel he's not ready to enter a facility then there are other options such as in home health care or adult day care. Adult day care is a really good option because it gets him out and around others that are on his same page. But more importantly (besides safety) is legal issues. POA's, bank accounts, updating wills, medical directive, etc. It can be very overwhelming but like I said one step/day at a time. You don't want to let this all slip thinking you have time because you never know what could happen or when you sweet dad does get to a point that he can't give his ok then you don't want to be scrambling trying at the last minute to get everything in order. The sooner you get things settled, the stress factor won't be so great. Take care of yourself also. Even though you love your dad, burnout is a factor so the more you can be on top of things the better. Good luck and God Bless.
Agree with Veronica. It is a personal decision and you will feel better if you can get all the info you need and talk to some nursing facilities about your and his needs. There are usually a lot of options out there, depending on the size of your city. Look into everything, ask questions, do what is best for you. One of the major things about taking on long term care for someone is the duration. My grandfather just went into a nursing care facility after living with my mother and I for over 7 years...And some people give care for literally decades. If at two months you are feeling overwhelmed, the time to start considering the transition is now. His needs do fit for nursing care, or just on the cusp of assisted living. but he will also lose abilities and have more issues as he ages. This is not a situation that...clears up, or gets better with time...A bit a physical therapy and the right medications will make minor improvements but the live an older person had at 70 will never come back...It just doesn't. Best to see them safe, and looked after where there are professionals who are trained in geriatric care, and not make yourself and your loved ones crazy trying t do everything yourself. The instinct is to hold on, but sometimes, your very best decision is to let go...
And remember, when you have run yourself ragged and are worn out and fractured, you can't really help anyone.
Good luck in the process and always feel free to talk and talk to others here, everyone has been or is living this situation, and more and more people are having to handle end of life and long term care issues than ever before in human history, truly. You are not alone!
Update here, G has UTI, none of the nursing or Dr.s on staff seem to be on the same page about it. But we are....! Like it or not... Storm windows off today, washed the windows...Sending sunshine to the East Coast...! Jen
Welcome needadan ear. There are lots of people on the forum that are in your situation and the trend seems to be to leave it too late to place an elder in assisted living. If he needs the kind of supervision you describle he is indeed ready to move to a facility. if you wait too long you and hubby will burn out from having to be constantly vigilent. I am assuming he is able still to manage his own toileting and bathing so think abead to when he refuses to shower and is incontinent, pees in the wastebasket or smeared feces all over the walls. Please place him before any of this begins to happen. start by getting POA and talking to his Dr and a lawyer and social walker about how best to proceed. Would he fight you on this issue or is he fairly complient at this point. i am sure other posters will respond with other view so take your time and explore all your options
Just new to this. My dad recently moved with my husband and I after he "slipped" in the house and couldn't get up. Luckily he was okay. Just a few bruises. He has CHF and kidney failure but the most emergent problem is the onset of dementia. He has only been with is since the first of February. Some days I feel like I'm going to jump right out of my skin from the stress. My biggest relief is going to work once a week, as I work at home the rest of the time, but then feel bad about leaving my husband to take care of him for that day. he needs constant direction and cannot take medication correctly unsupervised. He also needs someone to prepare his meals as I would be afraid for him to even use microwave. My siblings and I have talked about nursing facilities but I don't believe he is ready for that yet. I just need a place to vent. God help me, I love my dad so much but never thought I would become his full-time caretaker.
So glad Mike is a bit better and home! Praying for a quick recovery!
The service for mom was beautiful. She would have been very happy with it. We all got through it well. She had a good life so it was actually a happy occasion...a celebration of her life.
Now a new life begins for us. A little scary but I am trying to see opportunities. Thank you all for your kind words and hugs and thoughts!
Good news brother came home from the hospital Friday afternoon. The two days he was there he lost 12# of water weight. They have put him on a low sodium diet and he has to drink at least two liters of water a day to try and flush out the kidneys to get them to work right. The swollenness in his legs has come down a bit. They have him wearing a stretch sock that goes all the way up to his knees. That's it for now so thanks for the concerns. Hugs luvCuz
Mame! Today is your mom's service and I hope you all are doing the best you can. Your mom sounded like a sweet person and my best wishes are with you and yours.
I missed 2 whole pages of posts don't know how I did that and I am so sorry that I didn't write to you sooner.
Hi Cuz sounds as though Mike is getting the right treatment and it is working. Should ease his breathing a lot to get rid of that much fluid. Hope he continues to improve.
Update on brother. He is being givin a shot 2 times a day thru an iv port to try to get rid of excess fluid in his body. Since they started this last night, in the first 24 hrs he has peed 2 liters and you can already see the swelling in his legs going down. His normal weight is around 250 but he scaled in at 320. His heart was getting squished by all the fluids. I will keep you updated as I find out more. Thanks for the prayers. Hugs to all. luvCuz
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They're giving me an anti nausea along with the go go juice so that doesn't happen.
This will be my 4th poop shooter so I am not looking forward to it but they found polyps and removed them on the first one in the early nineties so I am happy to be alive.
Subsequent scopes have revealed no polyps and hopefully we continue the tradition with this test.
Mame! How did it go? (no pun intended)
Now that I'm not so severely sad after my mom and all the crazy that went with it I am on a campaign to get the medical tests and care I need in order to move forward in my life.
Jen said it best in a post on my wall: We are supposed to put our wants and needs last on the list in order to care for everyone else.
We all end up paying for it, whether it's Cluster Headaches, Severe Depression, Heart Attacks, PTSD or whatever else manifests itself in our stressed out minds and bodies.
This May it will be 5 years since the passing of my mom and after many false starts where I thought that I was coming out of it I finally gave up and sought the help of doctors and counseling to get me right.
Caregiver Lives Matter.
lovbob
bleah!
I know Deef...I like to say it as often as possible. Mom won't tell anyone how much it is costing, but I say it out of spite and bitterness...Grandma would be sickened, truly! Hell, literally! The pain is unimaginable and when it hits it is all you can know...I understand pain reliever addition. I f I had any, I'd take them. Excedrin will have to do. Jen
luvCuz
cluster headaches! Can't imagine the pain.
12,000 a month for G to live in the home is insane.
Glad Spring is making an appearance and hopefully it will take your cluster headaches away.
Mame! Good luck on your South of the Border Inspection! The stuff to drink is awful but sure gets the job done.
My appointment for this lovely experience is on the 30th this month.
What kind of cool job did you get?
Hope everyone is seeing some good weather. The midwest has been hammered.
Linda! Are you guys doing ok? Other than everything that you have had to deal with.
The Hits just keep on Coming…
Meanwhile! Austin! DEEF!!
Think about you guys a lot and wonder how everyone is.
lovbob
Almost did Monday. We had a green left hand turn lane...the white box truck had the red but just kept coming...." it was a near miss!...I was so depressed and out of it I hardly cared. Been well out of it what? No more worries...
been keeping busy, re screwed mom storm window in, making antimacassars for G old room furnishings, made curtain for back door window, to cover the metal mesh bolted into it (great neighborhood). Been very Springy weather cold warm cold warm wet dry wet dry...Probably need to mow NOW! But been fighting it. I did put on weed n feed so we are the only house with out Dandelions yet...
Good luck and good news on the colonoscopy bobbie. prep always worse that procedure as far as that one is concerned! hope you get the all clear sign!
Deef has the snow melted off there? any garden prep yet?
Hope everyone is doing well and a nice balmy Spring is making it's way everywhere...Have a good rest of the week! Jen
Things here are good. I have a part time, temp job. Feels good to be out in the workforce after 15 years of caregiving. Miss mom but I know she is partying up there with her brothers and her mom and dad. The sibs all came together for the funeral and a thank you note writing party about a week after. Mom would be happy.
Weather turning warmer! Makes everyone smile! Winter was tooo long this year. Hopefully the snow is done!!!
Hope everyone is doing ok! Mame
Today I have an appointment to set up a colonoscopy. Yup…. They're going to look up my old address….
This will be my fourth one over 25 years so that's ok. I know what to expect and don't look forward to drinking that gallon or so of nasty stuff that will polish my insides pink.
Hope Joyce isn't down too long with that foot surgery. Will be thinking positive thoughts for her.
Tell everyone I said hi and glad to hear is ok Aunt Hank and wish Mike's legs would get better.
lovbob
cuz
Hope everyone is doing the best they can with what they are dealing with.
Mellow day here on the creek, overcast and mild with rain on the way. Wish we could give some of the rain we've been getting to California.
More doctors' visits this week. Getting some deferred maintenance done as well as trying to track down some other stuff.
How is everyone else doing?
lovbob
Raining here, another day I can hold off mowing the lawn, yes it is that bad! We may pay for our lack of true Winter weather in Summer?...
Have a good week everyone. Love, Jen
No garden tools, but neighbors cat been using our patio for a latrine! Warmed up enough to tell....ew....
Been on hold due to her son living in another state. The bank would not transfer funds etc. without him being here in person. So the placement has been on hold until he could come back and take care of things in person. I'm hoping everything can get straightened out as soon as possible.
I'm completely fried! My house is a mess and in dire need of cleaning, etc.!!! Had to have fuel line and pump replaced on old furnace last week and was told the combustion chamber needs to be replaced before next winter, or a new furnace if possible! $8,000 I'm told, but the fuel consumption would be cut in half! So the furnace would pay for itself in 6 years. The old oil burner is now almost 50 years old, so not much sense in throwing more $$ into it, but I sure don't have $8000!!!
Looks like the plumbing will be put off and I won"t get my shower in my apartment this year. Hoping to go through junk in the attic and cellar and get rid of a lifetime of saving.
h
Have to get her to the lab for blood work in an hour, then I have the rest of the day to myself! Bet I just sit and do nothing!
Snow showers here all weekend and right now. Cloudy, cold and dreary. Still got close to 2 feet of snow on top of my garden and raspberries, but it's slowly melting away! Jen, I'm so jealous!!
Hope you are all doing well!
Deef
Nothing major here.Found a book for G, a Sear's and Roebuck catalog from 1900's. Should keep him occupied. Same staffing issues at nursing home. but at least he knows not to try to get up to help him roommate anymore...
Have a good May everyone! Jen
We've heard colleagues referring to people with “Guts”, or with “Balls”.
Do they, however, know the difference between them?
Here’s the official distinction; straight from the British Medical Journal: Volume 323; page 295.
GUTS - Is arriving home late, after a night out with the lads, being met by your wife with a broom,and having the “Guts” to ask: “Are you still cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?”
BALLS - Is coming home late after a night out with the lads, smelling of perfume and beer,lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the bum and having the “Balls” to say: 'You're next, Chubby.'
I trust this clears up any confusion.
Medically speaking, there is no difference in outcome; both are fatal.
One of the major things about taking on long term care for someone is the duration. My grandfather just went into a nursing care facility after living with my mother and I for over 7 years...And some people give care for literally decades. If at two months you are feeling overwhelmed, the time to start considering the transition is now. His needs do fit for nursing care, or just on the cusp of assisted living. but he will also lose abilities and have more issues as he ages. This is not a situation that...clears up, or gets better with time...A bit a physical therapy and the right medications will make minor improvements but the live an older person had at 70 will never come back...It just doesn't. Best to see them safe, and looked after where there are professionals who are trained in geriatric care, and not make yourself and your loved ones crazy trying t do everything yourself. The instinct is to hold on, but sometimes, your very best decision is to let go...
And remember, when you have run yourself ragged and are worn out and fractured, you can't really help anyone.
Good luck in the process and always feel free to talk and talk to others here, everyone has been or is living this situation, and more and more people are having to handle end of life and long term care issues than ever before in human history, truly. You are not alone!
Update here, G has UTI, none of the nursing or Dr.s on staff seem to be on the same page about it. But we are....! Like it or not... Storm windows off today, washed the windows...Sending sunshine to the East Coast...! Jen
I am assuming he is able still to manage his own toileting and bathing so think abead to when he refuses to shower and is incontinent, pees in the wastebasket or smeared feces all over the walls. Please place him before any of this begins to happen. start by getting POA and talking to his Dr and a lawyer and social walker about how best to proceed. Would he fight you on this issue or is he fairly complient at this point. i am sure other posters will respond with other view so take your time and explore all your options
The service for mom was beautiful. She would have been very happy with it. We all got through it well. She had a good life so it was actually a happy occasion...a celebration of her life.
Now a new life begins for us. A little scary but I am trying to see opportunities.
Thank you all for your kind words and hugs and thoughts!
Mame
luvCuz
Today is your mom's service and I hope you all are doing the best you can. Your mom sounded like a sweet person and my best wishes are with you and yours.
I missed 2 whole pages of posts don't know how I did that and I am so sorry that I didn't write to you sooner.
Shoutouts to all and welcome to the newbies.
lovbob
luvCuz