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The wife was doing a crossword puzzle and asked what would be a three letter word to describe the other half. She piped up real quick with.............. CAT.
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An elderly couple had just learned how to send text messages on their cell phones. The wife was a romantic type and the husband was more of a no-nonsense guy.

One afternoon the wife went out to meet a friend for coffee. She decided to send her husband a romantic text message and she wrote ...

"If you are sleeping, send me your dreams. If you are laughing, send me your smile. If you are eating, send me a bite. If you are drinking, send me a sip. If you are crying, send me your tears. I love you."

The husband texted back to her:

"I'm on the toilet. Please advise."=
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At dinner, a little boy was asked to lead the dinner prayer...

BOY: But I don't know how to pray

DAD: Just pray for your family members, friends and neighbors, the poor, etc.

BOY: "Dear Lord" he started Thank you for our visitors and their
children, who finished all my cookies and ice cream.

Bless them so they won't come again. Forgive our neighbor's son, who
removed my sister's clothes and wrestled with her on her bed. This
coming Christmas, please send clothes to all those poor naked ladies on
my daddy's Blackberry and provide shelter for the homeless men who use
mom's room when daddy is at work.

°°°AMEN°°°°
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mame am hoping that happens here, but at this rate....Mom has put the "mechanical diet" menu up on the fridge...adult baby food basically. Like it is a done deal and he is coming back here...Already replaced the mattress...and The PT asked about taking the DOOR OFF THE FRAME SO THE BATHROOM WAS MORE ACCESSIBLE. So it looks like mom is up for a** wiping...
Monty seemed at deaths door this morning, the CLEO threw up I was up all night twitching cleaning, what ever... Mom has gone down to see him, take clean clothes....God when is this over? WHEN?!?!?!!!!! Just so sick here...sick of it all....
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Mame -yes I can feel spring in the air-getting anxious to get out working in the yard but the ground is very wet.
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Got the call Tuesday morning that they wanted to move mom to a long term care floor. Thought it would be that day but then we got there and no one knew what was going on. By the time lunch was over and we got her hair done they had it figured out. So, mom is now in her new room. She was kinda mad at first saying we hadn't told her etc. She is ok now tho. Getting to know you stage all over again with the staff-but I know it will be ok soon as it worked out well upstairs. Her one nurse from up there came down to see her and make sure she is alright! She had lunch with some nice ladies yesterday and I was chatting it up with them and mom did get interested so that is good. I also talked to the new social worker and the head nurse and the activities people and asked them to include her in things as she won't know to ask... that is my big fear-that she will rot in her room. So, a new chapter begins. I know it is the right thing but it is still very hard.
Deef-I hope Blanch feels better soon! You are amazing. Jen-hoping mom comes around and realizes it would be better for all to leave FP at the home! Bobbie-nicer weather coming for all so maybe a cruise?! Wish I could join ya! Juju-hopefully all the house repairs will be easier to deal with come spring. Cuz-hope MIL has an easy journey... Meanwhile-take a nice horse ride for me! Austin-warmer weather heading our way! Sharyn-how are things? Hope everyone is doing ok out there! Mame
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My mom got a staph infection on her eyelid, and was putting a hot wash cloth on it, per the nurse's advice. As Mom sneezed she held the wash cloth in front of her, and I stopped her just in time from putting it back on her eye. Then one day she told me she always wipes the tub down after her shower with her wash cloth (there is a sponge on the tub ledge for that!), and I'd noticed that her face cloth and shower wash cloth had continuously been getting mixed up. So now I know how she got the eye infection! Yes, the things Mom does can gross me out, and I'm glad to know I don't have to feel guilty about it. Thanks for the amusing stories because laughing about it is a life saver!
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The MIL has been out of it for a while now but her minister was there and all of a sudden she looked up at the ceiling and said " when are you coming to get me". Then she kind of dozed off for awhile. Had everyone there thinking a little bit.
luvCuz
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Jen, so glad you spoke up!!! I hope they could see that your mom is no longer capable of dealing with FP. Maybe her doctor could convince her that she just can't do it anymore! Your time is over and you both deserve to have some good times.
Poor Blanche has a doozy of a cold but is holding her own so far. She got out her cough syrup as soon as the cold hit ans is taking ibuprofen morning and night. I had lunch with her today. She is loading up on my homemade chicken soup and resting/sleeping in her recliner all hours of the day and night. Good news is she's too miserable to have me stay and visit and is not calling me constantly! I just called her and she is ready for bed. So am !!!
Looks like a dusting to an inch here tomorrow, but the Cape is going to get buried!!!
Hope everyone is doing okay out there!
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Hey Mame and deef and Cuz...Went to the meeting, was about 6 of them PT, OT Medicare consult, Nurse, social worker...took about half and hour. He answered questions very straggly, oddly, like he really did not have clue what they were asking him...Mom tried to clarify but he just flubbed up...He Focused on his knee and not liking the physical therapy...till the PT came in them he stopped...The he left and went back to it at a later point totally unrelated to what they were asking again...Mom had questions but couldn't articulate them o I did. He told them the car seat is four feet off the ground which is why he can't go in Butt First! Then he tells them about his knee, again, that he used to put Ben Gay on it, but his daughter said it smells...I saw mom crumple and wince DOES THAT MORON HAVE A PERSECUTION COMPLEX OR WHAT!!!! ????ALL she does for him!!! I was NOT letting him pull that bullshit..I spoke up..."THAT is the ONLY way we have of knowing anything is wrong!" I said flatly, they got it.... lots of stuff like that, it is still an assessing phase for everyone... They wonder if he was using a walker before the ER visit..."No..." And he told them he went to the ER because: he had blood sugar of 40 and passed out...Um ,that must have been a past life thing... But basically, if he continues to re hab at the pace he is at now, he will be back first week of April, unless God decided to give us a break and drop a meteor on our house tonight!!!

i think mom is about over this, feels she can not keep it up any more, and that his constantly complaining and crabbing and lying to others making her seem incompetent or petty is making here really sad...With EVERYTHING she has done this last 6 plus years and even before he came here...It is just too much...

We shall see how much, by April....or that meteor....

Thinking of you MIL cuz and Blanche is doing Ok...mame, I know what you mean, just don't know...It is just day by day...And not my decision. Mom is glad to have me here though whether she says so or not. There is so much she just can't keep track of now...I do what I can...We are all doing what we can! Love Jen
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So I spent 5 hours at the ER with Blanche on Monday after she acted all crazy over the weekend. I knew it was a full moon, but had her checked for UTI, etc. She was pissed at me for dragging her there, but the people in the TV talking to her got a bit over the top. At least she now associates the TV craziness with me taking her to the ER, so she stops herself right after she launches into the black thing and the guys in it.
It was a busy week and after the ER I had a call from her every day, so I had to go to her house after each call. Then there was a doctor visit on Thursday and I got forms from the adult daycare to try and get her to go a couple days a week. I took her for a visit on Friday to see what it would be like. Sat and listened to Peter play the organ and all the clients sing for a couple hours. Boy, we were both glad to get out of there!!!. Then Blanche woke up with a bad cold on Saturday morning. She is coughing like crazy, but it's very loose, and she has no fever, so no flu, I hope. She was supposed to go for a TB skin test today and back to the nurse to get it checked on Wednesday, But I canceled because it was only in the 20's today and her cold is just peaking and I didn't think taking her out would be wise. Made hew some good old fashioned chicken soup for her and am making sure she rests and takes Ibuprofen every 4 hours to help her rest. If she isn't better tomorrow, I will have to call the doctor. At least she's napping instead of calling me all hours of the day.
Just goes to show you, even when you think you are done with care giving, someone else turns up on your doorstep and you get thrown back into the thick of things, even when you don't want to!
Everyone take care and do the best you can, because that's all we really can do!
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Jen, keeping my fingers crossed for you! Glad you went with Mom. Hope you spoke up!
Mame, I too found it more time consuming when my mom was in rehab. If she is content and comfortable maybe it's time you backed off a bit and took more time for yourself.
Bobbie, sounds like a lot of work dealing with that boat, but I'm sure you'll be so excited when it all comes together. Just think of all the places you can go!!!
Meanwhile, how's it going in sunny Texas? Still cold here and expecting a bit of the white stuff tomorrow night, but then warmer temps are on the way. We hope!!!
Cuz, sorry about the mil. Sounds like a tough road ahead for your brother. Sorry.
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Grandma's home remedies

"For better digestion I drink beer, in the case of appetite loss I
drink white wine, in the case of low blood pressure I drink red
wine, in the case of high blood pressure I drink scotch, and when I
have a cold I drink schnapps."

"When do you drink water?"

"I've never been that sick!"
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He had a defibulator-pacemaker put in a couple of weeks ago and is doing good on that part but his legs are getting worse. Can't walk to far so he really can't do any exercise so his weight is getting out of shape even though he hardly eats anything all day. Has his coffee in the am and supper at night when his son comes home from work. Prayers for my 96 yr old MIL. She is fading fast. Her body is just giving up. She wants to go home to be with her husband who passed 5 yrs ago. She has said she is ready. The meds she is on have taken her thinking away. She knows what she wants to say but it won't come out so she gets real agitated. The wife and her two sisters know that the end is near and they are ready also. She just isn't the person that we have known and loved all these years. Thanks for asking about my brother. You gals are something else. Hugs to all of you.
lovCuz
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Jen , how did the meeting go? Your mother sounds like she is in denial. Juju, how is the remodeling? Mame, hope you can find some time for yourself. Do something you want. Bobbi, how is the boat coming? Cuz how is your brother doing?
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We know exactly what he wants, to never die, it's him, it is JUST HIM!
Meeting's in an hour mom, doesn't want me there TOO BAD!!!!
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Jen-I just read your post on Hoping Someone Dies thread-I couldn't agree more! And that is why hubby & I have flat out told our kids what we want if we get "that way." And yes, filling out Health Care Proxy's etc so no one will have to feel they don't know what we want.
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I am so sorry Jen. Mom had a stint in rehab 3 years ago and I wanted to place her then but freaked out with her gone and the withdrawal and didn't like the care she was getting and I brought her back home. I wasn't ready. (It didn't matter what I was going through with her at the time-but it should have!)But I am sure this time. I hope your mom comes around soon. Everyone said that you know when you are ready and I guess it is true. Praying for you! Mame
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Mame...EXACTLY! But he may be coming back here, so the focus will not so much alter and increase....Mom flipped his (My old twin mattress) and as it is literally coated in piss, she has decided he will be getting a new mattress to go with the new rug..."When he comes home..." Jesus kill me now!!!!!!!!!
Wish she'd take $500.00 and get herself a new mattress, it's only been two decades since I bought it for her....whatever. put it out of my mind, $12.000.00 a month is a OK for ole s*** pants nursing home, (If he is there past the Medicare stipend) but H*** No! why should she have a good night sleep...Why should I care, she doesn't give a s*** about me anyway....Stupid life I have. Pehehe I am the three hundred 'dth answer on "Is it wrong to hope someone dies..." post...You know if someone reads that, in say five years and he is LONG since dead....I will not regret a thing I prayed for! Spring cleaning here, something fun to do anyhow...
Have a decent week everyone...Jen
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Hey Jen, I hear where you are coming from. Mom has been in the home since the end of Jan and is still the focus of our lives too. I am so tired. All the work getting her to be able to stay there! Ugh. I have had some moments where I felt the freedom for a short time...so nice. But mostly my mind and my time are consumed with her...and the withdrawal from her. It is such a roller coaster ride! I hope things work out for you!
Mom has decided that she is very happy being pushed around in a wheel chair at the NH. She has pretty much told PT she can't get up or walk. They are so disappointed. But I get it. Why should she exert herself when she doesn't have to? She has always been that way... kinda lazy. They think she is depressed and has given up-but I don't think that is it. She seems happy and is social and more of her kids are visiting more often... She just doesn't care about walking-and it is sooo hard for her I can understand it... I know it isn't necessarily good that she doesn't walk-but I get where she is coming from. Also, she does not like people telling her what to do and never has....and when PT is telling her she has to do something...well, she did for a while but now has gotten her back up. She won't. I couldn't force her here to do it...and they aren't able to force her there! She does seem to be doing well there otherwise. She is still on the rehab floor but I am sure that will change soon. We'll see!
Hi to everyone out there! Happy spring is here-at least on the calendar. Won't be far behind weatherwise I hope!
Gotta watch the SU game! Mame
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Even when he is not here he is still here!!! Just make him die already Jesus this is awful!!! Aunt visiting in May, mom already getting pissed about it. I suggest she could maybe go out to dinner with her cousins and sister and she snaps at me like I said lets go and have your father put down at the vet...FINE MA! I'm over it, do don't do what ever the fuck you want. Not my issue, just throw the old man's dirty clothes down and I wash 'em and you can leave me alone...
Going to the care giver meeting with the nurses at care center get update on the misery that is his continued existence find out if that existence will continue there or return here to the destruction of my delicate psyche. I went to DVR to see if I could qualify or get help finding part time work, the mentioned several times in the orientation (6 of us there) that you need to be "stable". I don't feel stable, and I couldn't leave fast enough. I couldn't even say Thank you...and I always say Thank you!
He is not here, and it is like his being still is the focus of our lives completely. there are times I swear I hear his God Damn coughing from the basement! Like he is still up there, pissing on the floor...Oh... she wants to take the "new" carpet out now. Squish squish Hmmn that one didn't last what two months... You know, I think...No, I KNOW she is expecting to have him back here by the end of the month... I am sure of it...

You know that commercial where the guy gets a note at work: "Your heart attack will come on Tuesday." or what ever....You know THAT would be like a fucking vacation!!!
Lemonade for dinner and I am going to bed...
I don't want to be conscious anymore...
Days like this, I understand why people drink...

Stay whatever...Jen
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Hmn not a psychopath here...yet....
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Good Early Morning Crew,

Jen! Keeping my fingers crossed for you. Got to be the end of this.

Juju! Meanwhile! Austin! Cuz! Soozie!

OK, as for me, I am waiting for my boat to get back in the water. They hauled the boat out and pressure washed the hull on Tuesday and man oh man the hull looked great. They will sand it and grind and epoxy only 6 small blisters (very big deal; only 6!)

I thought I would get her out for a bottom job last year but one thing after another and I didn't get her back to the yard until last week. It's been 3 years so I'm pretty relieved to get this done and to see the hull with my own eyes. Of course, the divers that have cleaned the hull over the last 3 years deserve my thanks!

Boy, who knew that having a boat was such a convoluted and intricate situation.

Jen! hopefully you can come and visit me and the Cat, Clawshank the Decimator, (the reason we can't have nice things) when your time comes! For the time being I have a little place and the boat and don't know how long this will last but it's good for now.

I get up early and rinse the bird poop off the docks and it's not quite 6am yet, the Cat is on the desk with me purring away and I am drinking coffee to wake up. The sun will rise at 7:27 today and I should have all of the dock work out of the way by then.

My experience with caregiving seems surreal at this point. I still have a visceral reaction when someone talks about it or they say stupid crap that we all have to hear from people who don't know any better. I know that I couldn't do it again but like so many of us, when faced with having to, we just step up and do it.

Reading the news online this morning, there was an article about psychopaths and different jobs. The job with the highest number of psychopaths was CEO (big shock) and the ones with the least amount of psychopaths are caregivers and nurses.

So, I guess the take away is that even though caregiving drives us nuts, it doesn't drive us psycho. It just feels that way.

Hope you guys have a good day and make progress on how you are going to live the rest of your lives when this stuff ends. It will end.

lovbob
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I sincerely hope so meanwhile....
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Hope your Mom realizes that he can't come back, good luck Jen.
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MMhnnm...Where is my foil hat!?

Just day by day here and really wondering if this is over for home living? Everyone feels better now he isn't here, EVERYONE whether they admit it or not! I can't go back!
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Oh Jen I knew he would play the sweet old man card-that will probably get old fast-my mom could turn on the charm for the professionals and then turn and screech at me for nothing-ruined he sweet old lady picture fast.
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Oh Jen, he has them fooled!!! Eyes roll on the bathroom incedent!
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We had a guy that lived in a box by a rest area on the free way. When he passed they found out he was worth 3/4 million and used to be a lawyer.
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That sounds great Juju. Oh I forgot about Jackass Judy. She died of a heart attack couple of years ago. But, she didn't use a shopping cart to carry her stuff around, she had a burro. My husband used to take her hot coffee in the morning. She was usually camped alongside the road somewhere with her burro. One year she wanted to get farther south for the winter, so I hooked my horse trailer, and loaded her burro up, and drove her down south (by the Rio Grande). Was prepared to say the AC was broke and leave the windows down all the way, but she rode in the truck cab, with Sam and I, and didn't smell bad at all. Found out she was claustrophobic, couldn't stand to sleep inside. When she died we found out she had 5 grown children, that hadn't known where she was for over 20 years.
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