Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Call the police like Lealonnie posted. You do not need to live with violence and being terrorized in your own home.
This is what the ladies in Al-Anon would recommend. We do not accept unacceptable behavior whether a person is drinking or not.
I had a situation where I had a spouse who was violent without his medications and was dually addicted. One of the ladies in the other program told me to put him out. She said why do you need to inconvenience yourself and your daughter by leaving your home. Besides, where was I going to go? I packed up his things and had them taken down to his mother's house. By this time he had already gone to treatment and relapsed for the third or fourth time and was staying with his mother. She was a sweet woman and didn't deserve any of this either. He was her baby and she wouldn't allow him to hit bottom.
You reach your limit, and I had reached mine. He was dragging us all down with him, and I was allowing this nonsense to happen in my home. I was missing days out work. I could have gotten fired myself. My supervisor was not too happy about that since others had to cover the desk for me. My health was pretty bad (stress related), and I had severe back and stomach issues the majority of the time managing to go to work and putting on a brave front. Being at work was my only outlet along with being in school. I had Al-Anon. I think without Al-Anon, I don't know what I would have done.
Living with someone who is violent and abusive is no picnic to live with. It was even worse after he lost his job.
No, I did not leave my apartment. Last I heard, ex got help from the state that included housing, food and clothing. We have been divorced since 1999. Not sure if he ever hit that bottom. He could talk good AA program, but putting it into action was the challenge. Action speaks louder than words.
Call a lawyer for guidance immediately. Even before you go to an Al Anon meeting. And call 911 the MOMENT your husband raises a hand to you or threatens you in any way. Tell the police you are frightened for your life, living with an abusive alcoholic. Get him towed off to jail and then press charges against him. That will buy you time to get your ducks in a row, financially and legally, before divorcing the bum.
I'm very sorry you have been going thru such a thing for so long. I pray that God gives you the strength, the courage and the voice to say ENOUGH.
If you don't have active in-person meetings in your area, check out the al-anon.org website. There are plenty of Al-Anon electronic and telephone meetings. Call the number on the website and someone can plug you into meetings in your city or state. If you are in another country, there are international Al-Anon meetings.
If you have a local women’s domestic abuse shelter you need to contact them, relate your situation, and ask for help. Alva’s pointing out Al Anon is an excellent resource as well. I’m so sorry your situation is worsening and hope you’ll find your way to safety soon
Faye, you are not alone. Please go to Al Anon at your nearest and earliest convenience. If there is no Al Anon there will be an AA. You need the advice and counsel of people who have BEEN THERE. They will have ideas for you.
There is utterly nothing you can do about or for an alcoholic. They have to address their alcoholism themselves. Or not. But you can do something about yourself and that basically comes down to staying or going. I don't know how long you have stayed, and I hope you haven't left this so long that you no longer have the strength to address it, but I do wish you the absolute best and can tell you that there is a whole lot of support out there just waiting for you with open arms and great advice.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
This is what the ladies in Al-Anon would recommend. We do not accept unacceptable behavior whether a person is drinking or not.
I had a situation where I had a spouse who was violent without his medications and was dually addicted. One of the ladies in the other program told me to put him out. She said why do you need to inconvenience yourself and your daughter by leaving your home. Besides, where was I going to go? I packed up his things and had them taken down to his mother's house. By this time he had already gone to treatment and relapsed for the third or fourth time and was staying with his mother. She was a sweet woman and didn't deserve any of this either. He was her baby and she wouldn't allow him to hit bottom.
You reach your limit, and I had reached mine. He was dragging us all down with him, and I was allowing this nonsense to happen in my home. I was missing days out work. I could have gotten fired myself. My supervisor was not too happy about that since others had to cover the desk for me. My health was pretty bad (stress related), and I had severe back and stomach issues the majority of the time managing to go to work and putting on a brave front. Being at work was my only outlet along with being in school. I had Al-Anon. I think without Al-Anon, I don't know what I would have done.
Living with someone who is violent and abusive is no picnic to live with. It was even worse after he lost his job.
No, I did not leave my apartment. Last I heard, ex got help from the state that included housing, food and clothing. We have been divorced since 1999. Not sure if he ever hit that bottom. He could talk good AA program, but putting it into action was the challenge. Action speaks louder than words.
I'm very sorry you have been going thru such a thing for so long. I pray that God gives you the strength, the courage and the voice to say ENOUGH.
al-anon.org website. There are plenty of Al-Anon electronic and telephone meetings. Call the number on the website and someone can plug you into meetings in your city or state. If you are in another country, there are international Al-Anon meetings.
There is help available.
Please go to Al Anon at your nearest and earliest convenience. If there is no Al Anon there will be an AA. You need the advice and counsel of people who have BEEN THERE. They will have ideas for you.
There is utterly nothing you can do about or for an alcoholic. They have to address their alcoholism themselves. Or not. But you can do something about yourself and that basically comes down to staying or going. I don't know how long you have stayed, and I hope you haven't left this so long that you no longer have the strength to address it, but I do wish you the absolute best and can tell you that there is a whole lot of support out there just waiting for you with open arms and great advice.