I'm tired of cooking/preparing 3 meals a day. It's just the two of us but boy oh boy can that woman eat!! She stays slimish, I get fattish. It's bad enough I do everything here much less start making her one thing and me the other. At times I feel guilty when I buy her fast food cuz of the nutritional value....not to mention I eat it too.
We will all be here for you, even if only to freak out, support, and love you.
aint happ'nin .
Wishing you the absolute very best. This can’t be easy for you. I’m so sorry.
Vent anytime. We are here to listen. I have not experienced what you are going through so I can’t help in that way. As varied as this group is I am sure others will be around to help.
I do send the best thoughts your way and offer support. Hugs! Please let us know how you are doing.
If you notice I clearly said that ‘some’ dogs are smarter than ‘some’ people! I stand by that.
Some people can be really dumb and some dogs can be extremely smart. It’s a fair comment in my opinion.
Broke my heart reading your post a few minutes ago.
I’m terribly sorry for the loss of your son. Sending the very best thoughts your way to support you in your journey for justice. I have two daughters and I can’t imagine what you are going through. Take care and hugs.
What’s your YouTube posting about? Will try to look at it later. Getting ready to cook dinner for us, husband and my daughter who is picking up her very intelligent little pooch, hehehe.
thank you so much ..
just a real bi*chin number from alice cooper . if you have the right amp and speakers , you'd see what i mean .
Ahhh, okay. Just had a few flashbacks of my youth, hehehe. My carefree days. Great! Will take a look. I always crank up good music.
Hey, I am a native of New Orleans. Certainly no shortage of music here. Music is wonderful therapy, isn’t it. I connected to music at a very young age. Got me through a lot of rough patches. Still does.
The very first jazz and heritage festival that I attended (first one held at the fairgrounds) here was on a school field trip was only $5. Will never see those days again, huh? Concerts weren’t much more. Not to mention our local bars with fantastic local musicians.
We had several free concerts in City and Audubon Park that I would ride my bicycle to, couldn’t drive being 14 years old. The musicians that played concerts here would fall in love with our New Orleans culture and hang out in the park and play for free, was so much fun. Have to say that we are not ‘anywhere USA’ here.
I had seen the Beatles on the Ed Sullivan show and I was 9 years old when they played City Park here. I begged my mom to take me. She said she was not going anywhere near “those screaming girls” and got annoyed with me when I told her that I wanted to be one of those girls! That’s okay because I made up for missing that concert with seeing tons others later.
You made me laugh when you said crank it up because daily I was told by my mom that she was going to pitch my albums out of the window if I didn’t turn it down.
After I moved out I rented a double and the guy next door was deaf and I thought to myself, great, no complaints from him. Hahaha He was a sweet guy and taught me sign language. He would come over for coffee and he mentioned that I had blasted my music the night before, to which I signed back, “How the hell would you know, you’re deaf!” He quickly reminded me that he could feel the vibrations. We both laughed.
Thanks for listening to me go down memory lane 😊.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FZ82_3tGM3U&list=RDMMcY2B_9KpRqk&index=27
this guy stops the PC BS in its tracks . :P
Like any other kid I went through my rebellious stage. I thought I was so in love with my first serious boyfriend. He stole my heart. I loved his long beautiful hair. My friend had introduced me to him. I was going to an ‘all girls’ Catholic high school. He was in public school. Their dress codes were relaxed and he had long hair.
My dad grew up in rural Florida just outside of Panama City Beach. Mom grew up here in New Orleans. He loved Florida so every summer we went to Panama City Beach for a vacation. I brazenly told my parents that I couldn’t possibly leave my boyfriend for a whole week in the summer. So I said if my boyfriend couldn’t go then I was staying home by myself.
What a brat I was, huh? We argued and argued. They didn’t want me to be home alone and came up with a compromise. He could come with us and they would get a separate room at the hotel for he and my younger brother. I had to stay in the double bed next to my parents in their room. So off we went to Florida.
Then the obligatory trip to see cousins a little further away in a rural area. My brother had long hair too. My boyfriend had long hair. I had long hair.
As soon as we pulled up my cousins looked at my dad and said to him, “Where are your sons? My older brothers were out on their own by then. I thought you had only one daughter. “ My cousins thought my brother and boyfriend were girls! Haha. My dad wasn’t thrilled about the comment. I think he was slightly embarrassed in front of his ‘country cousins.’
My cousin that is near my age asked me if I wanted to listen to music with him. I quickly said, “Sure!” Then he asked me what I wanted to hear and I told him, Alice Cooper because it was summer and I still had ‘School’s Out For Summer’ on my brain. He looked at me and said, “I’m so sorry I don’t have any of her music.” My boyfriend cracked up. So I asked him who did he have and he started naming all of his favorite country music. They only listened to country and gospel.
Being from New Orleans we listened to jazz. blues and rock. But that evening we had to listen to country!
I think of that every time someone mentions Alice Cooper.
I have varied tastes. Can't say I've ever liked Alice Cooper although I do remember the powers that be blasting School's out for the Summer through the message speaker into our classroom when we graduated from elementary school. That always stands out in my mind when I hear that song.
I used to think his song Only Women Bleed was about having your period. LOL
Too funny! LOL
Me too. I have a wide, eclectic range of music that I like. As long as it’s quality music. I’m spoiled. I have been to a bazillion jazz festivals here and I do go see many of the national acts but our locals that travel all over the world playing music are incredible musicians. We’re a big music town.
somehow weve went from there to a 'nice guy ' is a disgusting incel who expects sex because hes nice and non violent .
what an illogical and radical leap. nice guy is just mystified as to why women keep choosing the overconfident abusers. at a point we figure they needent complain -- the signs were all there .
Whine moment: My 81 YO mother has five living siblings (six until this past week, sadly) all of whom are in their 80s/90s and in various states of poor health. Mom is wearing herself out helping one sister in particular who is increasingly hostile and nasty... she has had lymphoma and now has heart failure mostly from having smoked a pack a day for over forty years, not that you can mention anything about the smoking without her yelling at you.
I try to go over and help out but it's pretty hard when you walk in with food when it took you hours to shop for ingredients/prepare to have her not even notice or say thank you. She also never seems to notice that any of us spending a lot of time caring for her have lives or our own or other things we might need to be attending to.
Our family tends to be long lived and my mother is one of the younger ones, plus I have another childless uncle on my dad's side who'll need help so just feels like I'm going to be on a treadmill taking care of old people forever. It's particularly hard because I didn't have children due to not wanting the responsibility. Honestly I'd consider moving away if I could but spouse has a job he really likes, we own real estate it'd be hard to get out from under, etc.
At least we're looking at in home care or AL for the hostile nasty one soon. I'm always in such a bad mood when I have to spend time with her, feels like it colors my whole life and some other things aren't going well which isn't helping.
Sigh. Glad I have all of y'all to talk to. <3
Sorry for your situation. It's ironic isn't it? I never wanted kids either and was the care giver for my mom. I was lucky though cause she never complained. In fact, she would probably have lived longer if she had complained now and again. But she hung on to her independence like it was the only life preserver left after the Titanic sunk.
I wonder what the difference is, people who choose to accept problems with grace and those who turn nasty and abusive. I try to have sympathy because I know it is likely not fun to watch one's health decline and contemplate the loss of activities one once enjoyed, but we're going on years and years of her health problems now and I think I'm starting to get compassion fatigue.
I love "Road Crew." Also "Bomber," "Emergency" and a few others. Did your hubs ever get to see them live?
As for your Aunt. None of us know how we might react when our health goes downhill. I hope that I am stoic when it happens to me. Or if it happens to me. It's not inevitable I guess but I know with my mom she survived breast cancer, open heart surgery, severe osteoporosis and still she smiled and laughed all the time. She never complained.
I've got big shoes to fill when I get old. But I know I tend to wallow in self pity when I'm feeling sh*tty. I'll admit it. I don't become nasty to people but I do get self-absorbed. I'm working on it. At least I recognize it so maybe I can try to avoid being a pain in someone's @ss when I get there.
It's probably even harder for your aunt if she once was a vibrant person. Maybe look at it that way if you can. I'm not taking anything away from your problem. Just trying to see things from a different perspective can sometimes help. Possibly..............?
Does she have triple A? The reason I ask is my friend disabled her mom’s car and her mom called out triple A to fix it.
Don’t have an answer for you but I wish you luck!
My cousin still drives at 97, got a speeding ticket and told off the cop! The DMV said she can drive as long as she passes the eye test. Seems like they would do a driving test also. Don’t you think?
A friend of mine lived with her SO for over a decade. He died instantly at the scene of a horrendous motorcycle accident on the interstate.
No other people were involved. He flipped over the railing. He was wearing a helmet but helmets don’t help in every situation.
My friend almost went with him but she was tired and opted to stay home. She went to bed, woke up around 3 in the morning he wasn’t home.
She had a nagging feeling because he should have been home. She decided to call the police to see if any accidents had been reported and the officer answering the phone told her he would check to see.
The officer came back on the line and told her that he was dead. His parents live in a different state so she gave them their phone number to notify them. Horrible situation.
I am heartbroken for my friend. Her sister called me and told me the bad news. I strongly feel when our number is up it’s over. When it isn’t it’s not.
Many years ago I had a horrible accident like him on the interstate. I drove a Volkswagen Beetle at that time. I ended up going into a tailspin and facing oncoming traffic. I seriously thought my life was over. I was in my mid 20’s and had just left work and going home. All of a sudden my car jumped up on the curb railing and it stopped me.
When I think of that same railing at the same location and my friend going over it and dying instantly it really upset me. Just threw me for a loop.
Another time I had a gun pointed at my chest. I was told by this guy during a robbery that if I didn’t turn over the money I would be dead. I literally begged for my life. He was wearing a mask but I swear I saw his eyes soften. He made a deal with me saying if I laid down on the floor face down and let him have a 15 minute head start before calling the police he would spare my life. I did exactly as he said. The thought did cross my mind that he would shoot me in the back. I was only 18. It was a summer job at a convenience store.
It wasn’t my time to die. These things happen all the time. Senseless deaths.
So sorry that you are having such a difficult time. A few of the forum's members were up late last night, and I know you were up too, with very little sleep.
Please consider taking a break from posting help to others today.
It is evident in your posts that something is wrong. I am so sorry this has happened. Talk about yourself, ask for the help you need, take your meds, and several rest periods, or naps, if you will.
Come back later, after resting, if you want to help others.
I do not know how else to help you. I do know that no one can help all the people, all the time. You have been through so much!
Take care now.
Thanks for caring. Have been though a lot. Comes with the territory. I had a crazy dream last night too. Didn’t help matters.
Not on any meds. Am seeing a therapist and it is helpful. I feel comfortable speaking with him.
Seeing my daughter over the weekend and looking forward to that. Last weekend I went to a movie with my husband. I hadn’t been to a movie in ages. Was nice. I am resting when I need to.
I think you'd have a rough time convincing any judge that you were held in emotional bondage by your aging parents.