To let you all know what occurred.

First off, please know I am grateful for your encouragement and the information provided.

I did consult with Adult Protective Services and I did follow their advice. I had to act in such a way that would cause things to move quickly and that was quite difficult for me as I love my grown son very much; however, catching him off guard was the only way I believed would be safe for me.

I filed a request with the Magistrate for an "Emergency" Protective Order and 4 Policemen came out that day to see that my precious son left. (It was a terrible ordeal as, thru it all, I could not stop crying; yet my son showed no signs of distress.) My son went straight down and filed an appeal.

The next day I went to court and the Judge gave me a "Preliminary" Protective Order. My son filed an appeal on that as well, alleging I was suffering from dimentia.

The next day I went to court again and the Judge gave me a "Protective Order" for two (2) months. Again my son filed an appeal, which put the entire thing into the Circuit Court.

A week later I went to court again. This time it was not the J&D Family Court. It was the Circuit Court and I had to tell everything all over again because this Judge could not let the prior courts' information/judgments affect his decision. It was terrible and, though it did not last that long, my body could not stop shaking, especially when I would get a glimpse of my son in the courtroom. (It is terrible to say bad things about a beloved son!!!) Still, I managed to tell it all again. Then the Judge called my son to the stand and let my son say all he wanted to. I could not stop crying because my son has such a beautiful voice; yet his words showed no signs of remorse as he actually confirmed all I had told the Judge.

This Circuit Court Judge gave me a two (2) year Protective Order and told my son his behavior toward me was despicable. (I've never heard anyone talk that way to my son; and in looking back now I believe this type of information and the potent way it was delivered could actually be a blessing to my son as I think he has been needing this type of "parenting" for a long time.

Now it has been a week since that last court hearing. I'm not having nightmares and I'm sleeping so much better. For many days all I could do was cry worrying about how my son was surviving as all he has is his disability check each month...at least that is all I know of...I do know $400 to $500 of his checks have been disappearing each month for quite awhile. Today, however, I'm realizing my thoughts are less about how my son is surviving and more about what he had actually been doing in and around my home. It is so obvious to me now that I should have stopped such behavior many years ago...before it got physical.

At times all I can do is cry about what a lousy parent I must have been for my son to be acting as he has now that he is grown (51 yrs old). Then I remember, no child gets out of childhood with a full deck as very few parents (if any) are all they should be; and with my being a single parent (too cowardly to get married a second time), there was no one to balance the parenting I gave. At times I can barely get passed blaming myself for my son's behavior even though I know he has had over 30 yrs to choose the character he wanted.

Well, here I am learning how to survive in the country alone...no family, no close friends...just myself, my 2 guard dogs, a small herd of dairy goats and a small flock of fowl. Still, I've managed to set out 4 apple trees and, when a stranger came to set up my ISP service, I found he was interested in bartering for some of my goat meat by helping me this fall slaughter and process them. So my Heavenly Father is still looking out for me. (Even during the last court hearing, I found an open Bible and the first words I read were in Ecclesiastes where it said, "To everything there is a season...") So I continue to "walk by faith" as I've done for so many years.

Thanks again to all who gave me information about Adult Protective Services and encouraged me to value myself as much as I loved my son.