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I am going to find out more, but the aides are being shuffled around in the home. Mom is borderline hysteric. I did ask a few questions, stated mom liked the one aide she had, but (as I expected), nothing is going to change. I told mom before I asked I doubted nothing would change. Oh well, I asked. I just don't know if this is a matter that needs to be pursued or just let it be. I need to find out if help shuffles are the norm: anyone else out there see this? As such, I don't think this is the hill I want to die on. Matter of fact, I refuse to die on it.

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When my Mom was in nursing care they moved all the residents to a new bldg. they had built to replace older one. The staff were all non-familiar ones. What with the new place and new aides my poor Mom felt just lost.

Not that I think this will happen to you but my Mom died very shortly after being moved. I'd phone her and she would be crying. I had built the new place up in her mind to make the move easier on her but she never liked it.
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It's to be expected. People resign, are fired and/or reassigned.
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Turnover in nursing homes is standard. The only promise is that care will be there as necessary. Some nursing homes also deliberately rotate staff so that patients will not crave the one caregiver. I solved it by hiring one caregiver during the day to see to my dad's needs. I'm there in the morning and evening so it runs smoothly most days. Adding to the meds means a doctor has to carefully weigh the other meds the patient takes. Our own doctor doesn't like to add too many meds which is fine with us and our method seems to work. Yes, it is expensive.
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The facility's business is supposed to be care of elders. One would think they would be well acquainted with what "change" can cause elderly clients. If it was my mother, I would meet with the director of the facility and aire the grievances.
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I noticed last night at mom's memory care a woman who's is normally very calm is now yelling and only wants certain aides helping her - while I tried to intervene a bit all she wanted was for me to get the aide out of her room and lock the door

Unfortunately she needs maximum assistance including a lift so it must be hard on everyone
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I have also seen how disturbing it is to residents, to have their aides be sent to another floor JUST as they are beginning to learn how to care appropriately for that resident, and the resident (especially those with dementia -- which are the greater percentage) are beginning to feel safe with the aides. The nurses hate it too -- as they are just settling into a workable relationship with the aides. I have seen this in homecare aide agencies as well -- the rotations specifically set up so that the homecare aides don't get attached to their clients. Whether or not there is validity in that, it is extremely confusing (and often distressing) to the client, and means that they (or family) are always 'training' new homecare workers of their specific needs. Aides/homecare people get minimal training, and in so-called 'best practices' -- that often don't meet the needs of that individual resident/client. If you are able to hire homecare, look for agencies that support on-going care by the same small team of homecare workers!!!
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Hi TwoCents,
This is happening at my dad's nursing home as well, and I don't know why. I guess to start we need to ask some of the Aides who are willing to talk. Nursing homes have a very high turnover. They are very short on staff new aides every single week. Nursing is very hard work, there should always be two aides to one patients but that will never happen. I am interesting in getting the Nursing Homes laws re-designed but it takes a village to help make it happen.
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Nursing Homes is when Satan’s camp resides. The Government and Families should get more involved in the care and mannerism of health care facilities period. The bars should be set at a higher level from management down to janitorial duties. Most people fall to Nursing Homes because they do not like authority, in nursing homes they do not make workers accountable to do their jobs. Pretty much rejects from main hospitals and clinics. My experience over the years has been begging for basic and proper care for my dad. I have to request medical attention, fluids, showers, therapy, changing soiled sheets down to my dad need to go to the ER. All attention on my behalf has resulted to bad attitudes from managers, nurses and aides. I have witnessed workers hiding in residents (they are patients to me) rooms to avoid caring for patients in need. Every day I visit, you can hear patients crying out for help. My dad had fallen 6 times with two months because they did care to come see if he were ok sitting in his wheelchair. The State is an utter joke- I have sent pictures with complaints and never got a response by letter or call. There has to be a new level of respect for caring for our elderly. Prisoners gets better treatment than our elderly who can’t care for themselves. I will do the best I can to help my dad and others during my passing by.
USA should be ashamed!
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most of the time mom is pretty good I will have to say. I guess the status quo got shaken up and I guess they get used to routine so it upsets them. the unknown is scary. She was calmer so I'll keep an eye on it.
thanks all
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My favorite private pay caregiver just told me this afternoon would be her last with my mom at her memory care center - I'm going to cry 😥😥😥😥

She recently got her psych tech license and just changed her full time job for better pay but with rotating hours - she had still been doing Saturday afternoons for us but won't be able to anymore

Not only did she handle my mom well but she alerted me to several problems at the facility that I would have not known about otherwise - a couple of weeks ago she even stayed late on her own time so she and mom could finish a puzzle -
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Twocents, I think Pam and I are thinking along the same lines. Also, find out if there is a geriatric psychiatrist or Behavioral Medicine group that comes to he home to do medication management. Geriatric psychs have been a lifesaver for my family.
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twocents, you have learned excellent coping skills by leaving and depriving her of your audience. Now take it one step further. Just ask the head nurse to see that some proper meds are prescribed for mom. I avoid directors because they know very little about meds.
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thanks babalou. I appreciate it. it's amazing how well mentals can hide their conditions. I have sometimes thought of it as self centeredness on steroids, but I may well have that wrong. Wrong because mom is narc and combined with mental illness would have led to hiding behavior. the outbursts she had seemed to be so contrary to her more normal periods.
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very good babalou, that does make a lot of sense. she was a bit calmer today, but thinks it is mass confusion for the staff as well as everyone else. you did hit the nail on the head, she's been 'whackadoodle' her entire life, coupled with the fact that she has a healthy dose of narcissism mixed in for good measure. she'll just have to get used to the new status quo, plus I also need to talk to the aide in question. I usually talk to her to sort out moms exaggerations
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Twocents, I didn't mean to offend in any way by renaming your mom's hysteria/agitation. You might notice that hysteria is named after the uterus--"hyster" as in hysterectomy. In other words, the way women behave when their uteri are out of whack.

By reframing her behavior as agitation, you get to see if as a symptom, perhaps of longstanding mental illness and/or dementia, not something she's working herself into. For a long time, my brother characterized my mother's anxiety as something "she's bringing on herself". It was not. It was a symptom of cognitive decline.
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I know the malleable nature of staffing. I thank all of you for your comments and suggestions. I think what is really my problem is that there is nothing I can do to alter this shuffling of the aides, but she is not going to 'let it go.' The suggestion of anti anxiety meds is a good one and I may well bring it up with the home if moms behavior becomes 'more agitated'. In some ways she probably has a point as she observes these aides interactions with other patients. That much I will allow her.
as an aside, If I choose to label my moms reaction as 'borderline hysterical', I am using it as a result of 60 years plus of observation of her behavior. This is nothing new, this 'hysteria' has different forms and manifested in different ways over the years. I watched her work herself into a hysterical paranoid fit back in 1977, I had to go somewhere for a few hours, and when i got back she was walking around yelling and waving, even had the boyfriend down involved in it. (I know what set if off btw, if anyone wants to know). I also could hear it in her voice yesterday when I went to see her. She has calmed down in the intervening years, but bits and pieces of the old behavior does emerge on occasion, I simply will not tolerate it, I just leave the room when she starts.
I repeat, the upshot is that there is little to nothing I can do about the re-assignment of this aide, and from what I understand, mom will be moved to another room entirely once the medicaid paperwork finishes (if ever). This may well precipitate another episode. I just hope she doesn't end up wanting to come home. I don't think it would work out. My fear is she is going to harp at this aide transfer, and when she does not get her way, is going to escalate. I am going to have another talk with the director of nursing at the home (not trying to change her mind), but only when I catch her at a calm moment and sitting in her office. It is just going to take a little time. I will also bring up the subject of the anti anxiety medication. Also, she refused a psychological interview way back at the beginning which does not surprise me either. She is super afraid of being 'found out'. oh well, I have to leave for the home in a few minutes so chapter 2 may well be on the way.
Again, thanks for your help.
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MsMadge, I'm sure in some places the best move on the fastest. At my mother's nh there was a core of long-term employees who provided continuity. Many had had their own parents or loved ones in the facility. A nurse who hugged me with tears in his eyes when my mother died said that both his grandmother and mother had died there. There was even a stability in the volunteers I saw week after week. The nh definitely had its share of turnover, but some of the very best employees and volunteers were there long-term.
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As difficult as it can be it also has benefits - but usually for the staff. When my mom first moved to a NH there was a sweet young woman who would rub my moms sore hip at night. One night she was too busy to do it and my mom had a fit - then when the staff that was helping out the first gal wouldn't rub my moms hip, all hell broke loose and mom was on the phone to me demanding that I make someone give her "a massage"! So, for a lot of reasons I actually think rotating staff is a good thing but especially to keep the same staff from always having to deal with the higher maintenance residents.
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I can't even get stability with my private pay agency hired caregivers - this week alone there have been five shift cancellations and it's almost to the point where I tell the agency not to bother finding someone if mom doesn't know the person already- last weekend she locked the poor sitter out of her room and she sat in the hallway for a good part of the night
As for staff at the facility I've noticed some turnover in the 8 months she's been there - of course the best move on the fastest 😕
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Turnover, whether scheduled rotations or because of staff quitting, etc. is a fact of life in care centers of all levels. This can be hard on the residents, but it really cannot be changed. I agree with the suggestion to consider med treatment of agitation.

Mom was in a nursing home for a little over 2 years. We could always tell when there was a significant change in staff -- her teeth wouldn't be in, or she wouldn't have a sweater, or she was wearing someone else's glasses. Then the new people would get used to each resident and things would be stable for a while. It happens. Comfort and reassure your loved one through the changes.
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The first facility I worked at I was rotated between two different hallways each night. My second facility we had permanent groups.
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Any facility has a good deal of shuffling and turnover. It is hard work and people burn out and seek other employment. I agree with babalou, get her some meds for her anxiety.
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My mom ( vasular dementia) used to become agitated --that's the word for it, not hysterical-- at any proposed change. She's now on lexapro, remeron and klonopin. Much less agitation.

No amount of explaining or reassuring mom helped. Only meds.
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