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muddbaby Asked March 2010

I help my neighbor who has dementia, because I have years of medical experience. I feel like her family taking advantage of this and using me as her caregiver. What should I do?

field.however, i had a car wreck and i now have seizures. they visit her 2x per week. she can not read and does not understand numbers. she can not cook nor dial the phone.she can not even pick out her own clothing. she was under my foot all the time. it was like we were attached at the hip. when i did this for a living i made over $1500.00 a week. i have feed her all the time as she can not cook or even use a can opener. done every thing except wipe her but and give her a shower. she was asking me to do all of this and much more. it got to the point that i had to put a sign on my door," if you have called me and are expected please knock otherwise please leave me alone.thank you" can you please help me???????? i am getting no where with her family nor senior advocate. thank you so very much

anne123 Mar 2010
Amen, Lilliput! Muddbaby, you are not responsible for this woman. Her family is. You need to get out of this situation. Her family won't step in until they feel the pain of natural consequences ( of you not caring for their relative anymore). Don't let them maneuver you back into caring for this woman. Tell the family you now have a full plate with just taking care of yourself and your delicate health. And then stick to your new plan. There is a book called "When Helping You is Hurting Me". You are so kind; and kind people need to remember to take good care of themselves. Good Luck!

toadballet1 Mar 2010
You have done your share as a "good neighbor" so do not let this family take further advantage of you. Contact the family and let them know that you are no longer available or, if you are interested, let them know your "rates."
However, do not leave your neighbor in the lerch...if no one is coming to take care of her contact social services.
Good luck...you are a kind person

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