Knowing what we do know about caregiving, what do you wish for yourself in your later years and what are your biggest fears?

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J

Jsomebody Asked August 2010

Knowing what we do know about caregiving, what do you wish for yourself in your later years and what are your biggest fears?

I think for myself, I hope sincerely to die before ever needing such care, but if I do, I would just assume it was in an assisted living setting and not tied to family. I hope I would be safe, clean, not a pain in the butt and not one of those unfortunates that are doomed to linger for years in that state of dependency, incontinence, loss and weariness.

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score 0 · Answer 1

What I fear the most is getting Alz which runs in my dad's family. If I get it, there's nothing I can do about it anyway so I try not to worry about it. I agree, I just want to be left alone. I'm somewhat of a loner and I'd like to go out as a loner. My kids already know I don't want to be a burden so if a NH is required, don't waste time getting me in one and under no circumstances are they care for me in their homes unless they want to, never under obligation. They've already seen the drama with my mom, their gma, and they know what they aren't going to do or put up with when my time comes. I told them I've had my turn at life, now life is for them and their families. They don't owe me for giving them life or anything else.

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score 0 · Answer 2

Totally, Just want to be left alone and not bothered or a bother to anyone. Going out like a light would be ideal, but so far I have not had anything else go well or as wished in my life. I doubt seriously anyone in my family would make house room for me. I have isolated myself from the abusers of my past so much for 20 years, literally since 14 that I am hardly family to anyone, and that is the way I want it. When my mother goes, I will have no reason to be here any more.

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score 0 · Answer 3

I've basically been in a state of decline or withdrawl for the last 8 years with my circles of social involvement and interests becoming less and less while I'm getting our house and yard just the way we want it to be after living in the first house we ever bought 5 years ago. I'm tired of drama. I don't want any more fighting. I don't want to bother anyone and I don't want anyone to bother with me.

When I get too old to live in this house by myself, I don't want anyone taking me in theirs or selling theirs to come move in with me or leaving their jobs much less put their own marriages at risk. See if you can use my reasources to help me stay in this house. I'm finally reaching the point of knowing who I really am after being forced into a mold 50 some years ago.

Now and particularly after my mother dies, I want the freedom to fly and live my life as totally me for whatever years that I have before me. There are things worse than death and I've seen both.

If my wife would agree, I'd extend our privacy fence around the rest of our backyard for my neighbors back yards take away from the beauty of the landscaping her, but moreso because I felt that my family and I lived in a glass house for 20 years and now I'd like some radical privacy which for right now I enjoy soley in my "Man Cave"

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