My aunt is not in poor health, thank God. Occasionally has back pain for which she takes aspirin or tylenol. Uses a walker sometimes but mostly a cane for support. We have a problem talking with each other openly and honestly without it turning into an argument and her saying things that make me angry. She denies having said this or that, so I'm unsure whether to even try to discuss much of anything with her. Just listening seems to be the best way to keep the peace...but it doesn't make for an enjoyable visit. I'm spending less and less time with her and that makes me feel guilty sometimes. Help!!
7 Answers
Helpful Newest
First Oldest
First
ADVERTISEMENT
Their may be some dementia going there at 97. The regression is real, so don't expect her to be kind or compassionate. Half the time they may not even understand what they are saying, or especially how it affects another. The thoughts & words get confused & jumbled. Denial is part of that.
Tact & diplomacy is out the window in their aged brains.
If you are the caregiver you don't have a choice but to deal with it & can lay down a few ground rules. If you are not the caregiver, you can shorten visits & avoid some topics of conversation as has been said already.
Best wishes.
There must be a myriad or things the two of you can do together besides talking about stuff that makes each of you mad. She's 97 years old for Heavens sake, forget it and enjoy the time you have left with her.