My mother uses the house as a open toilet! What do I do?

Pooping and peeing all over the house? No. That’s a deal breaker.

My mother is doing the same thing only thank God not anywhere but in the bed!!!. She thinks it's funny when she makes a big mess and I have to clean her up. Even my caregiver who only comes twice a week is disgusted with her. Speaking only for myself and having taken care of her for eight years in one capacity or another, I'm going the nursing home route. The cost will be well worth my sanity and I will hopefully again have a life!!! Enough is Enough!!!!

My mom had forgotten how to use the toilet as mentioned above. I've read this is near the last stages, how much longer did you have with your mom after that stage?

I had a similar problem with my mom when she was in the latter stages of Alzheimer's. Initially she would make it to the bathroom and forget how to pull down her pants and sit on the toilet. She absolutely refused to wear depends so we let her wear sweatpants without any underpants.
This allowed my father (her primary caregiver) to get her on the toilet as fast as he realized she needed to go. Also it was easier to wash the sweatpants or even discard them because they were not expensive.
Your mother may be squatting anywhere in the house because in her mind she is an infant and that was what she did before she was potty trained. If this is the case, you will have to try to modify this behavior in the same way you would do potty training for a toddler. Take her to the bathroom every half hour and get her to pull down her pants and sit on the toilet for at least 5 minutes. Sometimes she will go. Praise and reward her with a hug when she does. When she does not go, let her get off, pull up her pants and go back to what she was doing before. Keep this up all day for a couple of days until she starts to go on her own. But do not get angry with her when she reverts back. Just start the reinforcement again--always with loving kindness.

Thanks to all for your information, I have 2 beside side commodes one in her room and the other in the living room. I have covered most of the floor in her room and areas in main living area with with those fabric bed pads to help catch her "accidents". but she spends most of the day picking them up off the floor and I spend most of my day laying them back down and chasing her, she is ALWAYS on the go. She only sleeps about 3 hours/nite and is awake for the other 21hrs a day and hardly sits still.(I wish I had that kind of energy however I am forced to pretend to have energy LOL)thank god that the our house has hardwood flooring so it makes cleaning easier. I know I should tell my husband but I am afraid he will feel that it should be time to check out homes for mom, I am one of those people that think I can do everything on my own. I have tried the reward method, she tell me shes no kid and not make a to make a fuss. I try to put her on the potty at least 1 time an hour. I try to feed her healthly meals on a set schedule to try to keep her regular,(but I can't get her regular). I used to be able to tell from her actions(like a toddler) when she had to go. Now, for the most part there is no warning. I know in my heart she doesn't know what she is doing, but my mind thinks the opposite. Since, I asked this question a few days ago, I am now trying something different, I bought those diapers with tabs. I put one of those on her with a depends over the top. I told her that these are special underpants that you can pee and poop in. I told her that I wear them too. She thinks its pretty neat so far. I did home health for years before I started taking care of her, so honestly I'd rather change a soiled diaper thru out the day then scrub her, floor and furniture all day. I don't want her to become dependant on the diaper, I still want her to go to the bathroom. Its right now just trial and error but it seems too be helping. THANKS FOR ALL YOUR COMMENTS

I take care of my mother plus I have been a CNA for years 1st If you can get extra help get it.
2nd if you can schedule times to change her every three to four hours or less even if she does not have to go.
If you can sit her on the potty try turning the faucet on and let the water run down the sink so she can hear it
this may help her go. 3rd if you can find a way to cover things that can't be replaced because accidents are
going to happen. On the part she knows what she is doing well take it from somebody who worked in Nursing
Homes for years she really doesn't know what she is doing it but it way seem that way. Good Luck!!!

I am reading this as this could have been written by my husband who is suffering from this terrible disease. Along with the urination issues and being combative, he had been placed in a memory care unit, which could not deal with it.......and I had to sleep on a rollaway bed 4 nights until they could place him in an gero inpatient psych unit for med adjustments...........after 2 weeks there memory would not accept him...so he went to a skilled nursing facility and after 10 days just got a call he is going back to the inpatient pscyh unit......they can not watch him one on one..........he is going into other residents rooms and urinating anyplace and everywhere.......I know it is not his fact.........I had cared for him at home 5 years.........I was worn out and even as a retired psych nurse my days of caring for him in the home had to end.........now I could write a book....NO PLACE FOR MY HUSBAND.......that is the way I feel.

Nantucket & Other Caregivers Vs #2:

Sorry for all of you dealing with this, but, it is what it is. Your loved one is now incontinent, it may start out as occasional, but that is only short lived & a term, per a physician, that shouldn't even be used. They may get 1 & 2 in the toilet sometimes, other times everywhere & anywhere. There are too many steps for your loved to remember if nature calls these days, so, clothes may come off or not. A window sill, shower stall, or chair may look like a toilet. They may not even be sure what #2 is anymore, so, they may touch it, then want it off, so, on it will go to another place.

Whatever your preferred term, ALZ, dementia or memory impaired this is the real cause. Trying to reason or threaten with repercussions will not work. Depending on your loved one's cognitive your words may make things worse. You may cause shame, sadness or agitation & behavior concerns. This isn't a cookie cutter disease, so, who knows your outcome, but it is a battle you won't win.

The Depends is a must & make them become the "new underwear." Get the "jockeys" out of the house & no turning back.

Your choice on a long term solution is a personal one. It's either you're it, hope for instincts to kick in; you hire 24/7 help for your dad, experienced & knowledgeable; or you look for a facility.  This is a tough part of caregiving & will get worse as the disease progresses.  Many caregivers make a choice at this time because caregiving can & may become a full time job.  It is physically & mentally draining.  

All of us have to remember, thru the trials & tribulations, to not forget dignity & respect.  Empathy & compassion is a must as well.  If you love & care you find yourself becoming a voice for your loved one, it just happens.  Stay strong & focused, trust your gut on decision making.  

Blessings🌸

During my time as a hospice nurse, I had a patient that did this. We tried to be creative by dressing her in a one piece bathing suit under her clothes so that it was more difficult; dressing her in a one piece outfit (jumpsuit) with the zipper in the back, and of course, bathroom routine at least every hour. It is a very difficult issue to deal with. Have patience and ask for help from family/friends so that you can get well needed breaks. Dementia is a very difficult disease for families and it might reach a point where you cannot physically or emotionally care for her. Speak with your physician about hospice or call your local hospice for more information. The knowledge and support they can provide to your mom and you is amazing. You are not alone. Best of luck to you

Yellowfeever posted  (was getting hugs for this in 2016, don't know the month) that her incontinent mother had passed away. "Gone to join her dad." But the problem remains for others, so I think this whole thread is a useful one for new readers to sort through and pick up tips (or empathy).