What should I expect in terms of self care ie. Bathing, cooking, cleaning, care of pet etc. I have a husband, 2 children and 2 step children who are all grown. I have three grandaughters ages 5-9 who are the light of my life.
I am happy with very little depression and currently able to care for myself and most of my family and household responsibilities. I exercise daily an attend PT 2 times per week.
My greatest fear is that my family will have to sacrifice their own lives in order to take care of me. I do not want them to be my full time caretaker and we can not afford a full time sitter. I am in late stage 2 or early stage 3. Any suggestions for trying to plan ahead will be greatly appreciated.
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I think we all wish that our children will not have to be involved in our care (Mom said the same thing as we were growing up.) However, I am not sure if that is a healthy or realistic thing to say to the kiddos. If you are financially unable to pay for in-home care, then you may have to depend on the care of family....nothing wrong with that. Wouldn't you pitch in if you were asked to help with one of your adult children? The best thing to do is have an open discussion with your family now. Not every child will be willing to help and/or each may have their own skills and abilities. The worst thing that can happen (as happens to most of us in this forum) is to depend on one family member while the others remain uninvolved. You may want to consider dividing responsibilities as time and schedules permit. Augment family care with paid in-home care. (this has worked for Mom...we have paid caregivers come in twice a week. It gives me respite too.)
If we do not teach children that they have responsibilites to their parents we are depriving them of the opportunity to give love and attention back to those who raised them. It also signals that there is something terrible about helping someone who has an illness. Give them all a chance to step up to the plate - with no hard feelings if they don't. I think that planning ahead and keeping open communications will put your mind at ease.
Good luck...you have so much going on in your life. I hope you continue to concentrate on keeping yourself as healthy as possible....Lilli