Where do I find an honest and qualified person to give respite care for my mother?

All I can say here is that Lilliput nailed it! Good work, my friend. And good luck to you, InService. You and your husband need this time. I do think many agencies with a national record are a good place to start, as they have a reputation to uphold and do thorough background checks. That being said, they vary in different parts of the country, as does all care. So, you are always going to need to provide some oversight. Go with your gut and listen to the advice given.
Take care of yourselves and your marriage,
Carol

Whether you use an agency or do private pay, you still need to interview and screen.
If you have lived in the area for awhile ask friends, family, or colleagues who have an elderly family member. Personal referrals are the best.
Call your local hospital and ask for the social worker. Ask which agency he or she would recommend. (they will tell you that "all of them are good" but keep asking questions like, "who would you use if it were your mother.") That is how I found a great agency (Visiting Angels). The director actually came out to meet my mother and handpicked the caregiver. You pay a little more because the agency needs to be paid too. About $19./hr. Agencies will provide you a back up person on short notice, which is nice in a pinch. They also handle things like insurance and taxes. A good agency will also screen...but I would still meet the person first and see how they fit with your Mom.
If you do private pay, you will have to do the screening. I interview more carefully when I hire privately. If you want to go further, you can pay for a background check...it isn't too expensive. I do check references. You will have to ask your attorney about insurance liablity and how to do tax reporting.
With either option you need to do your homework....but as I said before...referrrals are the best. When I hire anyone, I prepare a sheet of duties, special needs, and the things my Mom likes. Also, include emergency telephone and cell numbers. I list all Mom's medical issues. For example, if the client has osteoporosis, the caregiver should never grab or lift them. Caregivers can not administer meds or do anything that is medical. I also ask if there is anything on the list that they do not feel they are qualified or do not like to do.
Also, remove or lock up valuables, important papers...basically anything that you do not want to "go missing" ....better safe than sorry.
You can never be 100% sure that any person will work out. However, with a little preparation, you can increase your sucess rate.
In four years, I have only had one person that did not work out and it was really a matter of personality differences.
good luck

I NEVER thought that I would trust anyone with my mother (theft, elder abuse etc) but I have found a wonderful lady. My advice is to go through your church/a local church. Our church has a nurse and it is her that I asked. I checked references and heard only good things about this lady.

i usualy have my daughter watch my dad if i needed to get away . or my husband will care for my dad while i go shopping or whatever . it sure is hard to find trusting person to care for ur love ones .
i stick with family members to care for my dad .
do u have anyone u know that would love to watch ur mom ?

Thanks Linda09 , I don't have family members near me to do that. I've been taking care of Mom for only 7months. In that time I have had only a total of 8hours break. I found out that I will be caring for Mom for a very long time so it's time to make some much needed changes. Thank you for caring and for your suggestions.

you may ask somebody who has a cna that comes in , i havent done that cuz i have my family here that does it , both of my girls are cna .
i hate the idea havin a stranger in my home . sometimes we have to bite the bullet and take the chances . some nusring home have a respites that will care for ur mom while u take a day or 2 off , adult center near by ?
my dad wont go to adult center . he is not well . sometimes i think he s on his way out . been like that for 3 yrs . .
my moto is DAMN IF U DO DAMN IF U DONT , ahh crazy isnt it ...
wish i could help u out .:-(

My family uses Home Instead to provide respite care for my father. They are a national company with a good reputation. My mom has been very pleased with the quality of care she has received. I think the most important thing to keep in mind if you are looking into outside sources for respite care would be making sure the company has a good reputation, screens their applicants and they are bonded and insured.

you're right screening is one of the best thing anyone can do before bringing one into your home to take care of your love one. Myself is a cna and love my job very much. I love taking care of the elderly, but there is one thing you will find on my background check, that will not be pleasing to many. My background says felony, its not who i'am, is what a mistake i made handling my business the wrong way with little knowledge. so i change from something i don't know, into something i do know , love and put smile on my patient face. I take care of one family Member for years. I goes from the sister, brother-in-law, sister-in-law,uncle.they keep me in a circle because they trust me. see screening is the best, but you can't screen the love in the heart. I made a mistake, but it didn't say who i'am, it just say what i did, it was the wrong way of handling my painting company. I took one of my patient and move her to Maryland with her daughter, i stayed there with her nurture her for a few months, until the Heavenly Father call her home. After coming back to my home, it was another family member waiting on me. After that family member went home, to be with The heavenly Father, i'm with another ,and this is where im today. Trust love and treated the way i wanted to be treated, because one day i'm going to be old,and then what. If anyone need a break just for a while, listen to the voice carefully your spirit should lead you the right direction, love knows love.