How can I cope for a loved one who is about to pass away?

I'm so sorry. I wish I had an answer for you but I am in the same situation. My dad is now is the care of Hospice. He has Alzheimer's and cancer. I never had a love one pass and knowing he is is killing me. I feel guilty if I am doing anything for myself, I am scared, I just can't imagine him dying. The other day I was buying him a birthday card and I realized it was the last birthday I would ever celebrate with him and I was suddenly crying hysterically in the middle of Walmart. I have little family, almost zero support. I'm afraid each time the phone rings that something might have happened. I have small children at home and it's hard to keep living life normally knowing what my dad is going through. I'm just at such a loss of how to handle it. I wish peace and comfort for you.

Just love him. Tell him the funny and precious memories you have. Cry when you have to and don't feel guilty for smiling or laughing. This is a precious time. It is incredibly hard, sad, and beautiful all at the same time. Touch and silence are important, too. I used to prop a pillow next to my father's hand so he could touch me instead of me holding his hand. I fell asleep once like that and he was smiling when I awoke. You truly will be in my prayers. You can do this, moment by moment. Rebecca

This will be a painful experience for you, but you will find the strenght to see it through and let him go through this journey of his life. I lost two brothers two years and I thought I would never stop crying, but I did, and now the pain has been replaced with happy memories and when I think of them I picture them being cuddled by God or the Angels. I am not deeply religious, but this is how I like to imagine them, it gives me comfort and looking back I know it was there time to go, but know that their lives were short in quanitity but quite good in quality. Let yourself grieve, but remember the pain will ease and will be replaced with memories and you will bounce back. My love to you. x

My father is going into a hospice today and I am his caregiver. Haven't had anyone die in 30yrs and then wasn't around when it happened, so I am scared and confused wanting to do all the right things.
Have been reading some books about dying which has helped a bit.
I want to talk with him. But he is coughing constantly and can't speak loud enough to really hear him....I feel it is important for him to be heard. This is very upsetting to me. Nurse says aspiration pneumonia.

This is a tender and precious time. Cherish it. Hold his hand and tell him anything you want him to hear. Even if it's hard, it is a neccessary part of life and the experience will enrich you. Grief is like an ocean, and the waves grab you and take you where they will. Think about it like riding on those waves. Hang in there, lean on family members, talk talk talk talk it out. Also, make sure you write everything down that you need to do - as your mind will feel like you're losing it. You may have a tendency to forget everything. Crying is good, and so is laughing and singing. Just express yourself and absolutely get support. I wish you the best.

it doesn't get easy, but the first thing you have to do, is to cry it out. If your dad or someone you know is dying, i know its gonna be hard, but you have to think of the positives what his/her life has been like, think of all the happy times. then over the years it will ease up. always remember you can cry, and talk it out with your family and friends, and always remember the person, Make sure you tell your friends and family you loved them. You can try to say oh i was mean, or didnt do nothing, its not your fault at all, Just remember your not alone.