My mother thinks that her mother,father and brother are still alive and talks about hem as if they are still alive. How do I tell her each time they passed away?

Ah, this is a tough one. Therapeutic lying is part of being a caregiver. If you gave her the info would she try & contact them? Or just keep the list? Each individual is so different as is each family dynamic. You have received some great advice. I wish you well.

This part of the alzheimers is heartbreaking to say the least. I do agree with all the above and used many of the same strategies with my MIL. When it initially began; I would say they were in Heaven and she seemed happy with this for a while. But, then when it progressed to actually saying she had to go take care of her mother (who she did for a long time) at mother's house. I told her she didn't have to do that anymore and someone else was helping. She also wanted to call people who were deceased; so I actually had her call my cell phone; so of course it would ring and ring and then I'd say no one is home.

I would put on a pot of tea and would redirect the subject. And this seem to calm her down as well. We would also look at magazines together and discuss recipes and gardening which her favorite things to do. I also had her write notes and such, and told her I would mail them.

Different things work for different people. Hugs to you - not an easy thing and so very sad. Take care.

I second what vstefans says. Mother is not in your reality any more. In hers, her parents and brother are living. Breaking bad news to her over and over serves no useful purpose.

I agree with the above post, you have to come up with little while lies that distract her... it is very hard for her to hear this every day, and i really liked the idea of 'sending' mail for her, tho of course you won't....oh, they'll be back in a few days, then redirect if at all possible, did you notice the how pretty the spring flowers are this year, ect.... the object is to go to her world, she doesn't live in yours anymore.... get her to talk about these people, those are memories she still has... let her talk talk talk about them.... she misses them, that is why she is talking about them.... just make up any excuse, be loving with your answer, as hard as that is when things are repeated over and over....Wish you well with this, hugs to you...

I can see the dilemma - you hate to lie, but you can't put her through acute grief every single day either. Maybe you can remind her they are "away" and not staying at a regular address right now, but if she wants to make a card or write a letter you can always mail it for her later?