My 93 y.o mom is in a nursing home, coherent, competent & has capacity. I'm her only child. Is this group appropriate for me?

Krusso, I think this is one of the best sites you could find for support. Even though your mother is in a nursing home, you will be managing her care more and more if and when she gets ill. You are her only advocate. My mother recently passed away, but she was living in a nursing home as well. If you have any questions, please feel free to ask.

krusso,

Welcome to AgingCare.com. We are a national website for family caregiver. I would venture to say this site is appropriate for you. I hope that you find the support and resources you are looking for here on AgingCare.com.

Best of Luck :)

The reason I asked is because she's in a n.h. & I don't do Hands on care AND she only has mild dementia - after she had "the runs" in July 2011 we noticed she put her soiled undergarments in the washer but always forgot to run the washer!!! So when we opened the washer we saw her soiled undergarments - is that "normal" thinking? Because I don't think it is - I'm guessing she does, indeed, have mild dementia. Also because I just can't find support anywhere else!!! Thanks for listening!

Hi krusso, I think this is a great support place for you and all the rest of us. There are lots of funny, understanding and kind people here full of support, experience and advice. I started caring for my mom about 18 mos. ago in my home, she has dementia. It was such a huge adjustment and I too feel a bit tired. When I found AC, I was on the verge of going nuts because I felt so isolated and couldn't get out to a local support group. This one has really helped me-it's available 24/7 and there are numerouse threads where you will find just the right fit for you. If my mom were placed, I would also consider joining (first visiting several groups, several times each) a local support group for your mom's main issues. This gives you a lot of insight and first hand knowledge of local resources. Visiting several different ones, several times, will help you find the "fit" that's right for you. And you'll make friends with people who share your same journey, right nearby, and they can give you a live hug when you need that. I love that AC is inclusive for all the issues related to caring for elderly parents, not just those who have a certain illness or issue. There is an absolute goldmine of info here, and the common thread is caring for our aging parents/relatives, in any/all situations/envirionments. Doing so is a hard road, tiring, challenging, frightening and so much harder than we expected, regardless of the illness or parents place of residence. After I was here for just a while, I have found friends that I love, who truly understand and, they are so FUNNY, it just lifts my spirits. There is a thread for disfunctional family caregivers, one for caregivers in general, one about all the gross things we encounter and deal with, where you can tell, literally, all the dirty laundry! You can post/follow any or all that interest you. While there is an occasional outlier, there is rarely any unkindness or judgements--this is a supportive atmosphere about the power of one caregiver sharing with another. Tell us more about your situation, ask questions, vent, laugh and cry with us! Welcome-I hope you find as much comfort and love here as I have from my many new "invisable" but very present friends, my caregiving cyber-family. Sending hugs and moments of joy your way, Kimbee

You can bet your bippy it is!! Someone here is in the same position.....we are more alike than you know......caregivers all....or were....or maybe not just yet....or someone has been placed in a NH.....or someone is thinking about it...or someone is dreading it..............