Father is 76 yrs old, diabetic with hypertention. I've discovered he consumes energy drinks with beer daily.

All you can do, gaylhust, is your best. You are not in charge of anyone else's happiness.

Are we talking one bottle of beer a day or many? A half a bottle of energy drink or a few? What do you mean by "out of control?"

I like purple's suggestion for having a talk with him about his needs, his health, and perhaps seeing his doctor.

But all you can do is try.

Floridakid and Purplesushi, thank you for your imput. No he doesn't use a sugarfree energy drink and I go over evry dayeither before my afternoon work shift or afterwards for a couple of hours. I know he is probably depressed or overwehlmed, but he won't accept any assistance from me, they do have caretakers that come in daily to assist mom, but he claims everything is under control. I am at the end of my rope and feel they will both end up in a care center and neither they nor my out of state siblings will be happy about that!

My parents are in their early & mid 70s. During the past year(+), they have relied heavily on alcohol (wine) to cope. It is due to depression - for both of them. I too am concerned that my parents are quickly becoming out of control and unable to care for themselves. My parents rarely leave the house, and I believe that is part of the problem. It seems to be a vicious cycle that is rapidly deteriorating. So far, what I am doing is keeping a watch over them, communicating at least every other day, visiting on weekends, trying to be upbeat and offering to help with things around the house. I found found they have stopped eating properly, which is aggravating the situation. You should probably check on that with your parents. Poor nutritional habits have landed each one of my parents in the ER in the past 8 months. I have been going shopping for them a few times a week and purchasing prepared food. I cannot stop them from drinking and I cannot stop them from making poor decisions. I feel for you...it's a tough spot to be in.

There are sugar-free energy drinks out there....hopefully those are the ones he is drinking. It sounds like he is completely overwhelmed - is he getting any help in caring for your Mom? Have you had a long talk with him lately and asked HIM how HE is doing? Sometimes the caregiver's needs get lost in the shuffle with the demands of the person they are caring for. Ask him how long it has been since he has been to the doctor, what his blood sugars are averaging, etc.