How do I handle my mom feeding her hallucinations?

Hispagirl...How are you doing? I'm so glad you are still posting. I think I stick around not only because I have some great friends that I am concerned about. And it's a bit therapeutic to be there and help someone else get through this whole Dementia/Alz experience. I hope you are doing well..and with time it does get better. My stress level is completely down. No more worrying...just busy. Take care and God Bless.

I think you should indulge her... fighting or trying to reason with a sick person is not good and it will only frustrate you and make her sad. If it's not hurting her, let her do it. I actually smiled when I heard this. As for not wasting the food, perhaps you can be part of her hallucinations by telling her that the kids have finished and you simply put back the food where it belongs.

How about making contact with real children during the day? My mom loves kids and pets, so we try to meet up with some when we go out, or invite the ones we know into her home. My mom would rather skip the Senior Center and go to a family restaurant. MacDonald's draws children with its clowns, playroom, etc. Schools and scouts have activities.

How have the police handled this? Are you sure that she has called them? Could it be that same way she "cooks" for them -- that she calls the police in her delusional world?

I would talk to the folks at the local police and/or sheriff's station and explain the situation about Mother and give them your name and contact information, in case she does make calls.

As you probably now, persons with dementia eventually reach the point where they cannot safely live alone. Is it "eventually" yet for your mother?

My mom has kids with her at night and claims she "cooks" for them, but there is never evidence that she does cook. She lives in independent living. Her grandchildren sometimes spend the night even though they live many miles away. She has called the police that some of the kids have been kidnapped. Her calling the police is what we are trying to resolve now.

These sound like good ideas - what about having her give the "kids"popcorn (and then bag it up again for next time).

Lots of causes for Hallucinations--seeing what's not there, with nothing in the environ to stimulate formation of it.
Lots of causes for Delusions--seeing things that aren't there, but which are triggered by things in the environ.
I'll never forget one patient, who kept seeing a monkey on the wall. Other staff kept charting he was hallucinating, and, rarely questioned it, since he was on morphine. One day, I asked him where it was, and if it moved--he said, "..right there, by the TV, and no, it never moves far."
I looked--sure enough, there it was! It was the black metal plate and 3 large bolts holding it to the wall, supporting the TV! Once he know what it was, and knew I could see it too, his mind must have accommodated, or something--he said he didn't see it anymore after that....then he was weened off the morphine, and it was a non-issue.

It might be important to try to learn if it is a hallucination or a delusion.
If it's a delusion, something in the environ is triggering it, and might be adjusted, to remove the trigger for it--delusions can happen even in those who are not medicated, but maybe sick, or injured.
If it's hallucination, it could be related to meds, infections, fever, etc., that might need looked at.
These things can be frightening, so if there is a way to explain them so they aren't scary, all the better.
If it's harmless, like the elder feeding children, those are pretty safe, usually, to play into--can actually help calm some elders, as some sort of stress generally triggers them--playing into them, helps them work past it, to another calm zone..

have the doctor check for uti

Instead of ice cream we have switched to plain yogurt, whipped and sweetened to taste with Stevia. Mix in pureed vegetables or cold, cooked split peas (unsalted) for extra nutrients and fiber. Whipped Ricotta cheese works too. Ice cream is not healthy for mom either, weight problem or not. These substitutes taste very good. My mom loves them--and she's fussy.

You've gotten some great advice from others so I have nothing to add other than how primal and sweet wanting to feed children is. If her hallucinations make her happy go with it and try some of the strategies above. And for sure don't eat the ice cream yourself! LOL

When Mom could still feed herself, she would take food off her plate and put it in little piles on the table for the "kids" that were sitting with her. She would have conversations with her grandchildren. This I knew because she would say their names when talking to them. Later during her meal, she would ask me where they went because at some point the hallucination would disappear.
Are you with your mom all the time? If you see her getting out the bowls and ice cream, maybe say let me get that for you and take 2 bowls, one for her and one for you. Tell her you would like some too and sit down with her while she eats and distract her. Some times all it takes is something else for them to focus on. And by all means, don't eat every time she does! You'll end up like me, 20 lbs heavier!!!
So, just go with the flow and try to distract her onto something else. Don't try to tell her no one is there, because to her they are real. Jeanne's example is a good one and I have used it on Mom many times.

Or you could say that they had misbehaved and were not allowed to have ice cream this evening. Or they had been sent to bed without dinner for some mischievousness.

Or...

They went to a friend's house for dinner.
It's a Scout night. Use any child organization there were a part of.
They went to a school baseball/football game.
They took the dog for a walk.
They had chores to finish.
School project.
School play.
Too much homework.
They had a date.
Went to the movies or arcades with friends.

I guess you can tell that I hit a point in my life where I was missing children at my table; eh? lolz

Hallucinations of children is often a symptom of Lewy Bodies dementia. Speak with your doctor.

Perhaps you could offer to assist and dish up a smaller portion of whatever she's serving. Using smaller bowls would add to the illusion that the dishes are fuller. Other foods could be regathered after a short time and reused. Take advantage of her fantasy - which is reality to her - by offering something to serve everyone that won't melt but can be reused. If only reused for serving her family again. I find it useful to play into whatever is going on rather than try and avoid it. As long as it harms no one and she is entertained, I say go with it. It will be less stressful for her and for you.

When the husband of one member of my local caregivers group had delusions of children in the house he always wanted to feed them and asked her to set a place for them. She told him they were watching a nature show on tv, waiting for their parents to pick them up, or that they'd already eaten because they had to go to bed early or some other reason they wouldn't be joining them at the table. It seemed to work for her.