Mom will not eat (most days she will) does not want to go outside for anything!!!!!!

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purplerain Asked June 2013

Mom will not eat (most days she will) does not want to go outside for anything!!!!!!

Hi all I just made a post on here today but ran out of space ...(lol) so I found this section to try to express my feeling. To start I have been taking care of my mom for 10 years and its been a lot of work expecially after her operation ( she needed to get a ostomy pouch put on. She got very ill after this and it took her 4 months to get home I was very worried and scared at the same time but she pulled through ...Had to learn all that goes along with taking care of this ....Oh did i say I wear ALLTHE HATS in this household but to fast forward to why I am on here today mom does not want to go to the dr. appt or do anything that means she has to go outside Its getting hard to get her to do her exercises and she is starting to not want to eat her meals sometimes I have no problem but as of today nothng she did eat her lunch and took her meds wont drink anything I try to convice her otherwise but she tells me to leave her alone I am ok. She does have dementia and wears hearing aids and uses a walker. Now I am 53 yeras old and I choose to do this sometime I wonder should I ........ but the part cant go there I am palnning to get some respite soon ( and I have done this before take a week to do something fun and to get a break. I have a very small of friends ( seems llike they just went away ) My family is about the same not much help but will try to call and get a favor out of us .....That is a big NO WAY We just moved to a very nice building and I am happy here can't tell if she is most of the time ....Got a nurse coming out to do assessment to get her started with some pt and maybe she will do it .....I hope that she will I have forgot to mention that she is 95! I feel very blessed she is with me but sometimes I get well fustrated but I am not defeated I hope that I get a responce make suggestions just venting Everyone have a good weekend I will be looking to hear from you ..................................Thanks much -------- Purplerain ^ _ ^

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score 2 · Answer 1

I found these Lipton tea powders in the coffee/tea aisle at W'mart. I believe $2.48 a box. They are just like the Crystal Light packets you put in bottled water. I buy a case of water and while the water is room temperature I mix up about a half dozen
bottles and stick in the fridge (it dissolves so much better and in no time you have a good ,cold drink. The (".") must have been a typo, sorry. I also give her Crystal Light, but she likes the tea best. There are also other flavors of tea. She was drinking only Ensures and pudding and here lately, she is eating and drinking and I just give her an Ensure to give her some extra vitamins. Hope this helps. I see where we are supposed to be in the 90's this weekend and all next week, so we will be drinking quiet a bit, LOL!

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score 1 · Answer 2

Help, chloesgrams2012 - you posted "l got some Lipton Blackberry/Pomegranate green tea. packets. I can usually get two bottles of water a day in her." I don't believe I personally drink enough water. Something like this would be wonderful.

Was the "." after tea a typo. Or did the input drop something between that and packets. ls what you're recommending a flavored liquid water bottle or is it a tea bag or a powder in a packet. I'm confused. Sorry to bother you with this but I am disabled and have someone shop for me at the store. I need to be able to tell them exactly what to get. Thx...

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score 2 · Answer 3

Chloesgrams, your comment, "I have a "non-water" drinking Mom, too.", made me laugh out loud! Thanks, I needed that. I will try the blackberry/pom tea. She drinks veggie/fruit smoothies I make with the Nutribullit. But, that makes her full and she doesn't eat her meals then. Which is her other thing: not eating too much in general. She eats very little of "proper" foods at lunch and dinner. Interestingly, thought she has no problem eating the ice cream in the frig. So besides keeping hydrated, she needs to work on eating more. She's around 95lbs. Would like to get her back up to about 105lbs.

JW: I will try the V8 fusion, thanks! Also, I think what you did was VERY CREATIVE, not sneaky at all.

Let's take good care of ourselves FIRST. I know, it's easier to say than to do. But, if we, the caregivers, get sick then we can't care for whomever we are caregiving for.
Seriously, God help us all.

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score 5 · Answer 4

Papa - just so u kno, purple posted this important missive on Jun 28, yet did not get one answer until July 8th. That day was my mom's birthday. If she had passed in January, she'd have been 95, same age as purple's mother is. Could be that's why I'm a little sensitive about your rather rude treatment of a fellow caregiver. Folks come here to post, vent, question, explain and learn. No one signed up to have their hands slapped by the self appointed writers composition police. It wasn't difficult to understand what purple wrote and most people with problems seem to write in a stream of consciousness manner. They don't, nor do they need to, express their problem in a short paragraph. Why pick on purple? And I'm having trouble believing someone thought yours was a helpful answer. Huh?

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score 1 · Answer 5

May I suggest you write legibly and not force people to read run on sentences that have nothing to do with your issue. If you can't express your problem in a short paragraph and ask a question, how do you expect people to give you meaningful advice?

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score 3 · Answer 6

My mom is the same. She's 84, with Lewy Body dementia and parkinsonism. Very hard to get her to eat or drink. She doesn't like plain water, so I found that adding some V8 Fusion to her water helps. It's the one that has both fruit and vegetable juice in it, so at least she's getting something. I'm not thrilled with the sugar content, but what can I do? At least she drinks it (if I constantly remind her). My mom also doesn't like leaving the house. Not even to go sit outside and enjoy the fresh air and sun once in awhile. But one day, I told her we had to go run some errands and I loaded her in the car. We left her walker behind and took the transfer chair instead. I took her to a small local farmer's market. She didn't want to get out of the car at first, but I finally got her into the chair, and once we started browsing, she enjoyed herself. Sometimes you just have to be a little sneaky, I guess.

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score 3 · Answer 7

Same here. Mom has never been much of a water drinker, even when we had fresh spring water on the farm. She isnt even drinking the 3-4 cups of coffee she used to drink. She is in a retirement home but I'm afraid she is worse off, mentally and she refuses to take her dog out and do things to get stronger. I have to go and insist she go down for meals. I'm threatening to bring someone in to monitor her meds and do some things so I won't have to go as often. Her response was "I can take care of myself". But had fallen back into her depressed, pessimistic attitude today. I have a journal from 1992 when she moved near me after being widowed. Sounds like the same things she says now. Says she is lonely, but won't get out of her room and get acquainted with others. I have found that she will eat icecream pretty often so I keep it in her little fridge most of the time. She hates jello and pudding which could provide some hydration. Best of luck with your mom. Everyone is different, so the solutions are going to be varied. God help us all!

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score 3 · Answer 8

I have a "non-water" drinking Mom, too. I finally found a solution! She even took her medicines with coffee. I got some Lipton Blackberry/Pomegranate green tea.
packets. I can usually get 2 bottles of water a day in her. I drink it along with her because it's been really good on these hot days. Hope this helps.

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score 3 · Answer 9

Sometimes, they refuse to just because they don't like being told. I feel guilty but there is only so much I can say. I just recently joined a caregivers support group in my area in Northern Calif. and these are all things that come up, these types of situations and feelings and knowing that I'm not the only one out there in a similar situation is a nice feeling.

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score 1 · Answer 10

Hi there, my mom and I are about the same age difference as you and yours. I have a hard time having her drink water to keep hydrated. We recently had a major scorcher, with temps in the 90's for over a week and I was so worried. Nagging, prodding, demanding her to drink, nothing worked. So, I just gave up.

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score 0 · Answer 11

I don't know how this person is typing, but I usually don't read sentences that all run together like this one. I have no solution.

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score 1 · Answer 12

correction ... send sentence above should have read: what is THIS LAG TIME all about?

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score 0 · Answer 13

Finally getting the assessment may go a long way in helping. I just want you to know that even though your question is dated June 28, it is today July 8th and your question just popped up in my email?? What is the liked I'm all about. How can anyone get answers in a timely fashion if there's a delay? Can you give an update on the assessment yet?

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Mom will not eat (most days she will) does not want to go outside for anything!!!!!!

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