Should I make my mother have cataract surgery? I am POA.

Limits as to what your POA can and can not do can be stipulated in advanced care directives written up, signed and notarized by a lawyer. POA covers the financial decisions like taxes filed, authority to sign checks, manage money ect. Advanced health directives would include exactly what your loved one wants done for the, concerning such a time that they are no longer able to make decisions for themselves due to dementia, stroke, coma ect. I carry copies of both documents with me always for my mother. Due to the privacy laws no one can talk to you concerning health of your loved one unless you show them your paper work.
Not bring POA places like SS, IRS, VA will not talk to you about your loved one. Even when you do have the paper work you will still need to meet their guidelines too! My mothers SS was garnished because someone filed taxes using her SS #, a refund was issued to the thief and then the IRS started take money from my mom. Since I was appointed to be my mothers SS payee(manage her money) they could tell me that the IRS was taking back money. IRS would only talk to me once I faxed them my POA paperwork, and only for that phone call. Until they accepted my 2848 form and they approved me could they then talk to me all the time now.
POA is important to be in order to help your loved one, if not you will be really frustrated trying to do things.

For what I have seen so far regarding POA, I will make absolutely sure that I will never give a POA over me to anyone.

You shouldn't make her to do anything that she doesn't want to. POA is only a paper, it doesn't give you master rights over your loved one. Just use common sense, that I know that unfortunately is not so "common", most people lacks of it. You can think that you are doing what you think is better for her. Big chances are that you are wrong.

bls0901.. you make a good point especially if it will give her a better quality life. I do know that cataract surgery is now done very quickly with laser, the patient is in and out the same day, they only do one eye at a time, so she would have to go back if you wanted both eyes done. She is lucky that you are such a caring daughter :-)

My mom has dementia. She does not remember much of anything anymore. Also, her hearing is really bad and we tried hearing aids but she lost them and they are very expensive to replace. She does like to put puzzles together but she is having a hard time seeing the colors. We get big print books for her to read of short stories and that does entertain her sometimes. As stipulated in her legal papers I was to become her POA if there ever was to come a time when 2 Doctors put it in writing that she had become mentally incapable of making decisions for herself. It also stipulated that I was the person she said was to make any medical decisions for her. Her primary care doctor had been pushing for her to go into assisted living for 2 years or so before I moved into one this past March. She had become so sick from not taking her medicines correctly, not monitoring her sugar levels ect. that she was in the hospital for 10 days. She had the memory of testing her blood 2x a day so she always said that she was doing it everyday yet her monitor kept a record of dates and it showed that she had not been testing herself for weeks and weeks. Once we realized that, my sister would go over every night she could to check her sugar levels. Mom was not very cooperative about having her come all of the time. I had a neurologist do an exam on Mom and he too agreed with the Primary care Dr. that she could not live alone anymore. I only what is best for my mom and I am torn as what to do about her eyesight. If it can be fixed then why not just do it for her and she will regain some of what she has lost.......

I am my mother's POA as well as her caregiver. I would never force my mum to have cataract surgery if she did not want it. Using one's POA "power" is only if the person is not making clear and rational decisions for themselves, it doesn't mean that if they make a decision that you don't agree with that you should insert your POA. Personally, I would let it go if she doesn't want it.

your doctor will monitor for complications. Once vision has stabilized, your doctor will fit you with glasses if needed.

My aunt had catarract surgery last fall at age 94. She recommends the surgery to anyone and is so happy she decided to have it done.She tolerated the surgeries just fine. In fact, she totally slept thru one of them. Putting in the drops before and after was the worst part, but it turned out fine. She is her own POA and it took years to decide. But a mutual friend of ours who had his cataracts removed a couple of months earlier helped convince her to have the surgeries.

If using the drops or having the surgery would make her more confused or agitated, then that would be something to discuss with her doctor.

As anyone will tell you, cataract surgery is a piece of cake these days. A painful shot in the arm, and then everything else is "just fine!" It's no worse than a deep filling - uncomfortable more than painful. Vstefans's questions apply, but the surgery itself is easy.

Will she be able to follow the rules and not bend over or lift heavy objects for a week or so? That's the only caution I would have.

She will adjust, and quit wanting to go home so badly.

About the cataract surgery - first question is whether she could medically tolerate the procedure, then how bad is her vision now and how much better would it be if she gets it. As a quality of life issue for someone with dementia, being able to see would be near the top of my list. She will not be able to compensate well at all for poor vision and may misinterpret a lot of things more than if she could see more clearly. It is sad that she can't live alone, and it is not something anyone accepts very easily. My mom used to think she could go back home alone if only she could walk, but that was by far not the biggest obstacle. Her vision problems, which meant she could not even enjoy watching the TV or looking at photos together, unfortunately could not be fixed as they were cortical (due to strokes in the posterior circulation.) We could yell to make up for her hearing loss and inability to deal with hearing aids most of the time, but there just was nothing that really helped with seeing so poorly...we did take her to specialists and I would have done anything short of general anesthesia to get her through retinal treatments, however difficult to understand or tolerate if it would have made any difference.