Recently he's not eating or drinking and sleeps a lot, says he feels fine. I think his body is shutting down and we as a family are ok w/ his wish to not see a dr, but are we ok legally allowing him to pass at home w/out hospice or seeing a dr? We realize that 911 will have to be called when he does die.
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dementia is so debilitating and torturous for the parent that i think youll feel relieved for your dad. my mom got so bad with hallucinations that only haldol, orally and injected monthly kept her sane. not a good QOL imo. a month ago when she could no longer enjoy even good food i felt like she was only existing , not finding any enjoyment any more.
When my 92-year old Mother passes, I do not intend to call 911. I am going to call her doctor first. My cousin, who is a nurse and knew her Mother was definitely dead, called 911 when her mother passed. She's so sorry she did. They came and tried to resuscitate her. She said, they might also want to take her to the hospital. I won't have any of that. I'm not sure how 911 might be in your area, but if that's how they are, as my cousin said, in my area, I will not call them.
Bless you during this time.
How is your father preparing his meals? Is he pureeing his meals?
I am concerned that you all allow him to live alone, given his level of medical needs.