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DadsHelper13 Asked October 2013

How can I get a full exam for my 84 yr old dad?

He has multiple symptoms dealing with breathing, muscles, & constipation & overall weakness. He has AFib which he takes Coumadin for, plus combivent inhaler, Toporol blood pressure meds, has macular degeneration and overall fatigue. He sits most of day as he has trouble walking for any distance, 25 feet at most & he's out of breath. He doesn't eat a lot and I try to feed him healthy meals but he just doesn't eat much. His neck is hunched over and he has a humpback which I'm sure is probably part of the walking problem. Part of me want to put him in a home where he'd be regulated to do more, which would help with constipation, but part of me thinks he will be angry if he's put in home. He smokes & I try to get him to quit but hey, he's 84 & if he wants to go quicker then fine...that's his decision. I just worry that there is something wrong with him and I need to find a doctor that will do a complete workup on him inside & out to find a problem unless its just old age.. I just don't know what to do and I can't just sit here & watch him wither away then die. What do I do?

girlscout103 Dec 2013
I feel your frustration, I go through this periodically with my disabled brother; I have learned over the years that I must manage the frustration and have begun to do yoga and meditation. Don't discount how beneficial this can be, I encourage you to try it as your safety net...

DadsHelper13 Oct 2013
Well we saw doc and seems he thinks most of Dad's issuesare due to his age. Bull@ Going to try to get another apt & get some tests done. He is just in so much pain in his neck & back and coughs so much that I worry. I try to feed him well, get him to quit smoking but no results. He just says he's been like this for 80 years and he's fine. Well he isn't and it's driving me nuts and frustrating me to the point I just want to put him in a home and be done with it. Sorry for the anger but enough is enough. How can you help someone that won't help themselves?

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DadsHelper13 Oct 2013
Thank you for all the great replies! Yes he has a doctor & I suggested a complete workup but docs brushed it off due to his age. He recently found out he has low kidney function so we see specialist this week. I try to get him to eat good but he is old & has his habits. He thinks the Coumadin has made him weak & I agree....that drug is for Afib with valve problem & he doesn't have that. I will try to get some answers from the docs and take him to hospital if that's what it takes. I will let you know how it goes. Thanks again everyone!!

peace416 Oct 2013
Is he seeing specialists that are treating his Afib, COPD? They can refer him to a doc that can give him a complete exam, prescribe tests, etc. and you can call & make an appointment for him.

pamzimmrrt Oct 2013
As far as the smoking goes I feel for you. Both my parents (and I am ashamed to admit my hubby and I ) smoke.. but my dad had quit. The ALZ made him "forget" this, and he can't remember he just had one... I have found if they are put somewhere he's not used to looking he smokes less. We move the pack around alot... LOL

JessieBelle Oct 2013
I forgot to answer your main question. Since your father has Afib and is being treated, I assume he has a doctor already. The doctor can do a physical. Be sure to discuss your father's symptoms with his doctor. Often a patient doesn't tell the doctor things, and quite often will even lie, so let your father's doctor know your concerns.

monday Oct 2013
Hello. You can have him go to the Emergency Room for the fatigue and the other issues. Maybe he has a UTI and maybe he is malnourished or dehydrated. While there, you will meet the on-call/house doctor and sometimes that can become his actual doctor (if you like him). If he already has a doctor, call and say he needs to be seen IMMEDIATELY (don't wait for an appointment for 6 weeks). Why is he taking Coumadin for aFIB? Ask the doctor for a FULL BLOOD WORK-UP - so the lab can test for everything. You can maybe think about making him SHAKES in a blender - and add powdered supplements, iron, etc. to it as needed/ordered by the doc. His nutrition is VERY IMPORTANT to keep all his organs healthy. He needs plenty of fluids! His constipation could be a result of poor nutrition. KEEP TRACK OF EVERYTHING (what he eats, when he has a bowel movement, etc.) Also, have you ever considered acupuncture for him? He is a very lucky and fortunate dad to have you as his child!

JessieBelle Oct 2013
Sounds like to me that he has some COPD and osteoporosis. Since he is being treated for AFib, I imagine that his doctors already know about what sounds like COPD. With AFib and maybe-COPD, they may not have wanted to approach the osteoporosis if he has that. (That's fine in my books, because I don't approve of the drugs used right now.)

The best advice I can give for someone your father's age is making sure they get good food. You won't be able to change his habits, but you can check to make sure he is eating well. See, too, if you can get him to cut back on smoking. Smoking steals oxygen from the body and makes it hard to perform for long. Plus it inflames the lungs, adding to the damage done by years of smoking. It makes it harder to get enough oxygen. If he doesn't want to quit, maybe he will cut back so his tissues can get more oxygen.

sharynmarie Oct 2013
i agree with Jeanne. Take him to a geriatrician.

jeannegibbs Oct 2013
Is there a problem with making an appointment for a thorough checkup? If you need to find a new doctor I suggest a geriatrician.

The "what do I do?" seems to be to make an appointment. Am I missing the point? What is it you need help with?

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