What are three things to consider when a behavior arises?

1) What in the heck just happened?
2) Can I just ignore it?
3) Does the elder have a UTI?

This sounds like a classroom question. In that case, the "right" answer is the one provided in the textbook or by the professor.

In practice, there are a lot of things we consider when a new behavior arises, such as:
- Can I figure out what is causing this behavior? Can I remove the cause?
- Is the patient hungry, tired, wet, hurt, frightened, or unhappy in other ways?
- Is this behavior dangerous?
- Is this behavior distressing the patient?
- What has been most effective with similar behaviors in the past?
- When is the next bus outta here?!

Do you mean like when you leave her alone for an hour to run to the grocery store and come back to find that she has drawn pictures on your nice cutting board in the kitchen with a black marker? Blew my mind.

My mother also occasionally exhibits unusual (for her) behavior. I will usually google the behavior or symptom unless it is serious (like inability to communicate). I stay in close communication with her primary care physician reporting the unusual behavior/symptoms so that they are documented in her file and if a pattern emerges or the frequency/severity of the incident increases, the doctor will be able to provide guidance.

From 10 years of experience caring for my 95-year-old mother, I know what you mean by a new *behavior* arising.

So, the first thing I do is over-react. I don't recommend this approach, but there it is.

Then I have a talk with myself with reminders such as (1) the sky is NOT actually falling, (2) she can't help it, (3) I can't change it and (4) with the grace of God, it is possible to cope.

Sometime I feel especially alone when overwhelmed by Mom's new behaviors, but that's not at all true even though nobody else lives here. Her doctor is a big help, this website eases anxiety and there are community resources.

Just know that many, many, many others have been through it, whatever the latest challenge, and survived. God bless.

Are we being quizzed? :D

What kind of behavior? Who is it coming from, a child or elder? You don't give us much to go on, and therefore, I can only say wait until the behavior is repeated several times a day, whatever THAT behavior is...

I love how we assume we understand the question and just give responses!!!!!LOL

In my case, when I NEED to get husband out of nasty, wet clothes and he becomes resistant and aggressive, I am learning to just say "ok, I'll be back later" and walk away, no matter how hard it is to leave him that way. Then I come back and try again, and perhaps again, and maybe by then he will allow me to get him out of the clothes and into ones If this doesn't work I push him onto the bed and forcefully try to pull off his wet clothes (this IS NOT a good way to handle anything and I'm working on improving myself!).

In my husbands case, the first thing I look for is if he is hydrated. Sodium depletion can occur very quickly and exacerbate dementia symptoms. Boredom is also a huge trigger. Provide a task such as sorting a deck of cards, or a box full of buttons to sort by color shape and size. Folding towels is a good one as well. Loneliness is the third thing I consider. A phone call to an old friend is very uplifting...even if she can only listen. Good luck and hugggzzz!

When it comes to dementia/alzheimer's, there is not always a consistent way to handle behaviors. You are not specific which makes it more difficult. What I will tell you is that my sister and I handle our mother differently..she has Alzheimer's. Our mother will insist that she want to go home (she is in memory care). Sis will tell her, "You can't live by yourself, you have started fires on the stove, melted the linoleum because you left pots on the stove for a long time and when you lifted the pot off the burner, the bottom fell off onto the floor. The dr. said you cannot live alone anymore and reported it to APS. All this does is cause our mom to become defensive, cry and beg to come home. She will even get where she starts yelling at my sister, calling her names, accusing her of falsehoods which then upsets my sister. Mom ends up getting a Xanax...sis gets hugs from caregivers and she leaves. I tell mom that we are waiting for her dr. to fill out the paperwork so she can go home. I tell mom, the dr. is on vacation and as soon as he gets back, he will take care of the paperwork. So far this has worked for me,. mom accepts what I say. I give her hope...while it is false hope...it still makes her feel better, avoids the emotional outburst and using medication to calm her down. This may not always work as she progresses but I am appear of that, and I am prepared for it. Sometimes medication is the answer but it depends on what is going on. Provide more details, we can offer more suggestions. Hugs to you!!

What kind of behavior?