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ypiffani Asked December 2013

Do I have the "right" to remove the phone?

Dad's phone rights? My dad had dementia, he is "with it" about 50% of the time and the rest he is out. My problem is he sits next to the phone and the answers on the first ring normally GREAT!! but... he then orders anything and everything they are selling, or gives hundreds to charity, or makes appointments with people he doesn't remember doing, I can't keep up. Do I move the phone? we have an account that the house money goes to and he will cut off all access to it for no REAL reason, he thinks money is missing or he knows people are stealing... I have gone to the grocery store several times and had a basket full of groceries only to run the card and have them tell me its been reported stolen... MORTIFYING! I am seeing an elder atty to get help with the financial also... is it wrong to want some sort of allowance? I live here I take care of him full time but I'm out of money, and I could use some necessities, do I have the right to that?

Countrymouse Dec 2013
Short-term, with the cards being refused - always go back to the same store, and hang the embarrassment: they'll get used to you and sympathise. Hope you get it all under control very soon. x

crimson Dec 2013
Be careful. Some states its illegal to remove the phone because that may be the only way they can get help if needed. When mom lived with me I was required to have a home line nearby in case needed. When she moved to the nursing home I was sad to find out that I am not able to keep her from using the phone. She calls EVErYONE she can remember and tells them that she's being helled hostage with no food! She's called the police and SS about 4 times!

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anonymous158299 Dec 2013
someone needs to go break some chinese ( or whatever ) face for hassling elders. these people barely eke out any english and the same person will call every couple of hours trying to sell medical supplies. its tormenting our elders literally to death. my only consolation was in envisioning these phone ( irritants ) working at gunpoint.
go ahead, envision it. makes me laugh every time.

ypiffani Dec 2013
answer to Chicago... yes its in his name only. Debralee... I do not have any children living at home all are grown... the household acct IS from his pension, I payed until my retirement ran out and now I ONLY buy for the home or for him... hence why I wanted an "allowance". lol nothing is arbitrary and the PCC will be drawn up by atty. awesome Pstie ... where do I get that?

pamstegma Dec 2013
Buy a Tele-Zapper, they really do work, better than the do not call list, which the telemarketers seem to ignore.

lsmiami Dec 2013
If you are worried about solicitors calling the number you can get an option that screens calls not on a list, otherwise you can turn the ringer off

Labs4me Dec 2013
You are smart about seeing an elder attorney. Unless your father is deemed incompentent, he has rights to how he conducts his life. You mention "household money" What source is that coming from? Do you have POA? I understand you are caring for your father and doing all the household responsibilities, but if the source of the income is from your father only you cannot just arbitrarily use it on yourself or your children. A contract needs to be drawn up that states what your responsibilites are and how much compensation you will receive. Also what needs to be taken into account is what your financial contribution, if any, is toward the household. Laws are very strict about using the elderly's money for yourself. As for moving the phone, you can try, but you cannot deny the right for your father to use the phone.

Chicago1954 Dec 2013
No, it is not wrong to move the phone. I would change the number. You may need to hand the phone to him and have him say that he wants a new number. Is the account in his name, only?

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