Hospice wants me to just morphine my Dad up and let him pass. Am I wrong that I can't?

My good friend struggled with this. I told her you don't have to give the full dose. You don't have to dope up the patient, but if they are crying or in pain, give them what they need to be comfortable. No one is asking you to kill him, just make him comfortable and leave the rest to God.

i think its pointless to continue fighting once the dying process has begun. hospice monitors vitals and they know when organs start failing. i wanted to ease up on the morphine so mom could talk to us again but she was dying and it would have been selfish. in my moms case hospice heard no sounds from her digestive system and knew the process had begun. i think your dad needs to be free from his pain.

If his mind is sharp, maybe ask him what makes him most comfortable; if he wants it, please consider honoring this. His body is in a weakened state and pain even thought not evident can still take a lot of energy to fight the pain vs vitals.

He might be saying no or be indifferent because he senses you aren't comfortable with it. My dad began increasing his use toward the end..to maximize his comfort. There were times when he wouldn't ask but I could see it in his eyes that he needed something. I always gave it to him. My mom couldn't and it was part of her needing to hang on and wanting more awake and lucid vs sleepy and zoned out.

It sounds like hospice thinks he is entering a new end phase. Please talk more with them. They have so much more experience with these things and palliative care then we do. Try to trust them. Ultimately it's yours and dads decision, but it's okay and you can be at peace with it.