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STAYSTRONG57 Asked January 2014

Are court appointed Guardians honest?

I have posted about my half brother taking advantage of my Mom. Borrowing money, getting her to co-sign for his house as he caused his divorce from drinking. There is a lot he has exploited my Mom. All I get for answers is get a Guardian... That is very costly....Elder law attorney says that is the only answer.. APS does nothing...Why do I have to have Mom pay $125.00 per hour for a guardian?? I mean she needs her money she is in Assisted Living. It is $55,000 per year. But id I don't my brother will continue to not pay his taxes on his house, my Mom is responsible. It's just not fair. Mom has memory issues.she does not get the whole concept of most things. I brought her to a Memory clinic last year and they said she was fine that she was under stress.Then I really could not believe it so I made an appointment and was told to talk to an associate, she said Mom's was never ruled out for Dementia ,that is not true, The doctor is about 60 years old maybe he has it...So what to do? There has to be another option to keep my brother to stop pursuing sponging off her. he currently goes to Assisted Living and sleeps and eats there, which costs Mom more money. I have told the assisted living place that as of mom's POA I will not pay the bill for my brother and they said they can not get in the middle of family affairs. They think Jay is a sweet son.. He is not allowed visitation with his twins because of his anger issues, but his x-wife is so hard up for a break she let's him. Then he goes up to Mom's and looks like a mentally sound son.. Far from the truth. He has beat me up when I became POA. He has hit his x-wife.. Had a temper outburst i front of his twins and broke a curtain rod in front of them. What is wrong with Vermont???? No one wants to do anything!!!! I am so sad but frustrated,,,,He took some cash off Mom last night and I think she almost realizes it but not sure , he said he left a $18 tip for a pizza that cost $22. And he picked it up..... I am not stupid!!! I need some answers...

pamstegma Jan 2014
Sunflo, he is running up a big bill at the facility by eating and living with mom. The only way they can keep him out is with a restraining order. I would at least attempt to get one. In NY it would be very difficult for a Guardian to steal from a client, they have to submit annual financial reports to the surrogate's court. As Guardian for my sister, I am accountable.

sunflo2 Jan 2014
You can report him to APS but you will need strong documentation of each of the instances you think he is taking advantage or a danger to mom. He may have anger issues with you and ex, but maybe not with mom...and there likely would have to have been charges filed for the other assaults for APS to consider. I know you don't like him taking money from mom, but if she is handling her own finances or you are giving her allowance, she has a right to give him money if she chooses although you may have to put limits or place most of the money in a special account set up for her care so you and mom can account for it separately from misc allowance for pizza, sundries, etc.

No one likes to watch the con, and the best you can do is limit the cash, checks, valuables left with mom that he can get access too.

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STAYSTRONG57 Jan 2014
It is a Major decision I am not stalling , I have seen even lately in Vermont Guardians stealing off handicap clients... It's a major decision, Also if it was not for this one half brother , things would be fine and Mom would not have to pay for a Guardian...My half brother is 48 years old... Something wrong with him.

pamstegma Jan 2014
Your mother needs a legal guardian, pure and simple. Yes, it is expensive, but it will ultimately cost her more to let the brother continue to sponge off of her. Stop stalling and complaining and set the wheels in motion.

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