Why are people with Dementia such good liars?

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deedee2170 Asked February 2014

Why are people with Dementia such good liars?

My dad has been lying about his memory issues and his change in behaviors. He forgets things all the time loses time and cannot remember conversations we have had 20 minutes later. He has gotten mean and vindictive and now has his long term psych turned friend believing him that he is fine and synthetic weed caused all his issues. Now his psych/friend has released him saying he has no issues. He can go back to living on his own and take care of himself.We know this is not true all the way up to the day of his last appoint minute there was proof he is not fine. The psych/friend wouldn't listen and let my dad have his way.We have put up with so much heartache and fought to ensure my dad was being taken care of now we have no support. The psych/friend says hes fine and we need to let him live his life. We know what is going to happen as he just keeps getting worse even on the aricept. We have been left with little choice and have to let him move back on his own. On one hand I am glad the drama is over on the other I am counting the days because I know its not going to last..

Alzheimer's & Dementia

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score 0 · Answer 1

I have already reported to the dmv and he does not have insurance on his car. I talked ot the sherriff station here and they said that they would have to catch him in the act and we cannot keep his car from him. We had someone lined up to administer his meds that he would have to pay. Now that the doctor said hes fine he doesnt want that and doesnt want us doing anything.

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score 0 · Answer 2

I read what you wrote and it said the psychologist took his license. If your father no longer has a license, then he can't be insured. He can't operate the car without license and insurance. I would alert the Dept of Public Safety to be on the lookout for him. If he is driving illegally, they can remove the car from him, or at least put a boot on it so he can't drive it.

The medications are a bit trickier. It took me over two years to finally convince my mother to let me handle them. It can be very difficult to take charge of them.

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score 0 · Answer 3

Oh, he's incompetent by a long shot and so is the psychologist. Do not let him drive. Hopefully he will call the cops and then the truth will be known. Your other duty is to write a letter to the DMV outlining his incapacity. Get him off the road.

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score 0 · Answer 4

We are trying to figure out how to do that but with his psych saying hes fine theres nothing we can do...The POA we signed states if he is deemed incompetent then we can do the things we need to do. Now that he has said he is fine we are very limited to what we can do. The psych told my dad it is illegal for us to keep his car from him. So my dad is running with that. My dad has the upper hand and we all know what is going to happen, its a train wreck waiting to happen, one of his episodes as we call them landed him in ICU on a ventilator and almost crossed the line to his DNR but that doesnt matter to his psych.

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score 1 · Answer 5

The story telling (confabulation) can make us feel crazy. My mother is a confabulator. The stories that she tells all sound very plausible, but I know that they aren't true. When she makes up stories, they become true to her. There is no way to convince her things didn't happen that way, so I don't try. Only a few are important enough to say that they didn't happen, because it would cost money if I ignored them. I wouldn't ignore the car or medications, but would somehow get some control there. Those things are too dangerous to ignore.

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score 1 · Answer 6

He is a psychologist and he has been seeing my dad for 20 years. You would think he would know when he is lying. I understand about him wanting his independence however he gets in his car and cant remeber who he is or where he is going and the psychologist took his license but told him my brother and I can't legally keep his car from him. He doesnt take his meds properly and he doesnt eat and gets imaginary phone calls to take more meds or not to drink or eat. He has refabricated his life with my mother and so much more. He is not under the care of a gerentologist I am not even sure what that is. He has had MRI and CT shows he has had a stroke brain, atrophy and a slowing in his brain consistent with dementia. The neurologist put him on Aricept and he is also Bipolar. The thing is is my dad is only 63 he is young but it is not unheard of in a man or woman his age.

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score 1 · Answer 7

I thought I would tackle the question asked -- why are people with dementia such good liars? People with dementia, and old people in general, fear losing their independence. If saying they are okay helps them to stay in the life they want, they will say they are okay. It can become easier with dementia, because they can't remember things that were forgotten. Often they even fill in the gaps with things that didn't happen. People who didn't know better think it all sounds normal. If only they knew how much was made up.

I actually have my fingers crossed that your dad can do okay on his own for a while. The main thing I would worry about is if he decided to use the stove. Maybe the stove can be disabled. That would eliminate one worry.

Is your father under the care of a gerontologist? If he has dementia and no other psychological issues, it may be the best way to go. It would be easier to have all of his care done by one person who understands older people. It is hard to fool a good gerontologist.

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score 1 · Answer 8

A psychologist or psychiatrist? There is a huge difference. If he is a friend, his relationship is not necessarily a professional one. Ask Dad's primary physician to send Dad to Neurological Clinic that deals with dementia for a full Neuro-Psych workup, including brain MRI or CT imaging.

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score 1 · Answer 9

I am so sorry to hear this is happening to you and your family. Have you tried to get another provider and go to one that will listen, take you all seriously and look at the evidence that your dad is in mental decline? I read that if you bring an outside source to talk with the person dealing with the memory issues, it will be a little better because they have no attachment to the person and nothing is in it for the person to gain. Hope this helps.

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Why are people with Dementia such good liars?

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