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hickybottom Asked April 2014

My Mom's 82 and has a pacemaker and mitral and trispis valve leaking she is on oxygen most of the time. How long do we have with her?

Kathleen2251932 Apr 2014
God Bless her, I will say a pray for her tonight. I think for any of us we have to take any problem our love one has not to focus on it. Every day all of us have is a miracle. My mother actually had dementia for 12 years and at the end she died from MDS. At least with her dementia that went on for 12 years and the MDS for 10 years She did know her 4 children. I would of never of wanted to see her die from end stage dementia. Instead she just got weaker and weaker. I did bring her home from the hospital after she took a bad fall down 13 steps and cracked her head and needed sutures and staples. She was given a blood transfusion which I never would have allowed as her Health Care Proxy. My sister allowed it to happen because she could not say no. I just let it go. The deed was done. I brought my mother home with Hospice and I made sure she was kept comfortable. I worked in a Geriatric Long term facility for 32 years until I had a work related accident in 2008. I tried to work and lasted for 2 more years. My last day was June 30, 2010. I believe every thing happens for a reason. I watched my mother decline the following fall. She refused to see the doctor and I never forced her to go. She was comfort care only, the doctor was in agreement and said don't force her. She took the terrible fall in January and was in the hospital for 5 days. I brought her home with hospice care. She came home and had a hospital bed in the living room. I also bought a bed and slept with her. She was kept very comfortable. Her birthday was Febuary 25th. I knew it would be her last birthday. I did not thing of how much time I had with her. Everyday is a gift. She died on July 17, 2011. I did expect it that weekend. I got into bed with her the night before and just held her hand. I do believe in God and I do believe this is not the end. I felt fortunate, I had her for 50 years. My father died when I was 16. Take one day at a time. Speak to her PCP and go from there. One day at a time and enjoy every day you have. It has been almost 3 years and I am at a good place. I know she is with my father. I am at peace.

merigreene Apr 2014
Doctors can tell you more about how bad the valves are. No one but God knows how long before she goes. I have seen them give short times and the person live for years. Sometimes they can hit fairly close but never 100% reliable. A small bug can cause her complications and status can change quickly. I agree with person who says cherish every moment. Try to document any information you would like such as stories from her past and good luck.

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mrn4eva Apr 2014
My Mom has had "leaky valves (all) for 5 years. She also has atrial fib, mild pulmonary hypotension with hypertension. She is under the care of a cardiologist and he said she could go for 5-10 more. She also has dementia and doesn't even realize she has problems. To her, she is healthy as a horse. No oxygen needed nor does she have breathing problems. Shoot ,I could go first :).

drkernisan Apr 2014
Leaky valves are common & usually become problems when the leaks are bad enough to cause heart failure. Surgery can fix very bad valves, assuming the person is otherwise likely to do well after surgery.

Oxygen is not usually needed for leaky valves or heart failure, so I am wondering if your mother has advanced COPD or other serious health problems.

If you're worried about how long you have with her, I would really encourage you to set up a visit with her primary care doctor, to ask about her overall health status and what to expect over the next 1-2 years. Tell the doctor you'd like to understand what kind of health crises to prepare for, and what your management options might be. (This is great preparation for doing an advance directive, btw.)

If the PCP isn't helpful, you might look for a palliative care consultation, or advance illness management (AIM) program. The clinicians are usually trained to discuss how much time might be left, and other issues related to planning for future declines in health.

Good luck!

ferris1 Apr 2014
I have a leaky mitral valve since birth and have been very active for 65 years. Check with her cardiologist as this may or may not be a major problem. Best wishes to her!

bethanyrita Apr 2014
82 is bless from god . My mother is having same problem she been on oxygen for ten years most. God has the answer. Talk with the Doctor she goes to should give some answer. My mother has heart problem and doing ok right now. It is blessing for elderly parent to live up to eighty.

pamstegma Apr 2014
She could last a long time. But bear in mind that at 82, every day is a gift from God and you could go at any time.

dogabone Apr 2014
I don't believe any of us has a crystal ball to answer that question.Cherish the time you have with the ones you love

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