Sorry this is such a hard time for you. I am not sure I have any good advice except whatever you do, to do it from your heart and take care of your self.
All good ideas. Make new memories for yourself by doing something nice for her and share old memories w/her. Anything you still need to know about her, your early childhood, family, ask NOW. Tell her how much she means to you. I lost my mom last July so this is my first Mother's Day without her and it is breaking my heart.
Time is important. My Mom lives out-of-state, so I will call her on Mother's Day to talk with her and wish her a happy day. I am planning on flying up to see her in June.
Mybe your question was more of an emotional one. I suggest treating it like a normal Mother's Day, leave the sense of finality out of the picture. But do get a picture, one for you, one for mom, of both of you. Get prettied up and either have brunch in with her favorite foods or views, and you. Mostly she will want you. My Dad enjoys the hummingbird feeder by the window.
Just want to reflect back this sentence from you Lizajayne: "I have been very blessed to have a wonderful mother, she knows how much I love and respect her, I'm sure what ever I do for her, she will feel loved." Anyone who can contemplate Mother's Day with those words in their heart and mind has much to celebrate AND the celebration is already there, already assured. With or without champagne I toast both of you! Not everyone has this.
Whatever is her favorite meal and desert- and family photos. I am making a CD and will hook up my computer to the big screen- photos will automatically keep running and I have added music from her generation.
My mom is on 16 different medications, I would never dare to serve her any drink that would react with the medications. She is home bound, in fact she only leaves her chair to potty. She is sleeping most all of the day and night. I was thinking about all of the wonderful ideas, your mothers are very lucky to have daughters like you all. I think I shall get a large blooming planter that hangs from the front of the window, this would be something that she would see when she is awake during the day. Most likely a home cooked meal to share with her, she eats very little now, but tries to make dad and I happy by eating what she can. I have been very blessed to have a wonderful mother, she knows how much I love and respect her, I'm sure what ever I do for her, she will feel loved. Thanks so much for your input. Lisa
If getting in the car isn't too stressful for her, I wholeheartedly agree with the ride down memory lane idea. If you don't live too far away, drive by her elementary school, high school, first house, someplace she and your dad dated, the neighborhood where she hung out as a teen.... The possibilities are endless and it's a physically undemanding way to do something that really feels like an adventure- covering a lot of ground and a lot of years. You'll probably hear some old stories that might never have otherwise occurred to your mom to tell. Have somebody in the back seat (so it's not intrusive) writing them down or recording and, as others have suggested, take lots of pictures.
Definitely pictures. Have her identify people you don't know. Ask her to tell you about her younger days. What was her favorite memory of you? What the most exciting thing she did as a child? What were her grandparents like? Make it a day full of her memories that you will treasure because she shared them with you. When that day comes, that your mom is no longer here, you will have wonderful memories of this special day. Blessings to you and your mom. May it be a Happy Mother's Day for you both.
Whatever she wants to do. I lost my mother last year, and would do anything to have her around for Mother's Day. She loved a spa experience with massage and facial I got her one year.
Whatever her special interest, take photos so you'll have those lasting memories, talk, and most of all, make sure she's enjoying herself.
Definitely get her on video, on your phone or camera...ask her questions about her life and what she's learned that she can pass on to you...take lots of photos...Watch a movie she enjoys, take her to brunch,
If she has trouble getting out, get a to go order from her favorite restaurant and rent a movie she would really like. Get out the family photos and talk about who and what. You might want to record this conversation so you or your siblings can view it later. She probably doesn't get out much and might enjoy a nice drive to memory lane locations like the house she grew up in. Keep it simple. Invite only siblings or others you know she would like to see. If you decide to dine out, try to take her either the day before or wait until the after-church crowd clears out about 3:00 so it's less stressful with no waiting time. Above all, have fun.
My mom's favorite thing is to watch old family video tapes. Second, go through old photo albums. I lure her to my house with lobster, which they NEVER serve in the AL facility ; )
Champagne! It opens the airways and the blood vessels. I'm adding orange juice to mine to make a Mimosa. And don't forget the strawberries dipped in dark chocolate. Chocolate is actually good for COPD as the theobromines in cocoa open the airways and stimulate the heart.
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You'll probably hear some old stories that might never have otherwise occurred to your mom to tell. Have somebody in the back seat (so it's not intrusive) writing them down or recording and, as others have suggested, take lots of pictures.
Whatever her special interest, take photos so you'll have those lasting memories, talk, and most of all, make sure she's enjoying herself.