I am my mothers caregiver, I find bruises on different parts of her body? I notice she runs into things a lot, and sometimes it seems on purpose? Then I have to give her attention. I try everyday to give her the attention she needs but I am so tired and run down with this attention thing? I don't want her to hurt herself badly but how do I get her to stop this?
5 Answers
Helpful Newest
First Oldest
First
Some medications (and alcohol) can cause people to bruise more easily, as well as some diseases. Is she complaining of dizziness? Her balance might be off because of an inner ear problem.
There are reasons other than intentional self-harm why she might be doing this. You should ask your mom's doctor about it. If she checks out fine physically, she could be doing it out of boredom. Horses chew on the wooden doors to their stalls out of boredom. Boredom can make pet birds pull their feathers out, and captive octopuses have been known to pull off their tentacles because their tanks are too small and they have nothing to do in there.
Good luck.
ADVERTISEMENT
If she's on an anti-coagulant med, that could explain the easy bruises.
Perhaps you can approach what you feel is the need for attention on a different level and in a different way. I do understand you're tired; I think probably everyone here can emphathize with that, and it is hard to be positive about giving attention when you're mentally and physically exhausted.
Try anticipating her need for attention, perhaps starting by giving her some attention first thing in the morning, Perhaps just spend some more time chatting with her. Put on a CD of her favorite music when you leave and give her favorite books or magazines. Try to create something for her to do while you go to work or do your chore work around the house.
Then take a break and spend some more time with her. In other words, create several times daily when the two of you can just put aside everything else and bond with each other. If she does need/want attention, pre-empting the times when you feel she injures herself deliberately may reassure her she's still loved and can get attention without harming herself (if that is what she's doing).
But also tell her that you're exhausted and are trying to find ways to spend quality time together, but that you need down time too.
There's nothing you can do about it unless you want to follow her around all day which is unrealistic. This is your mom's issue, please don't blame yourself for not giving her enough attention. There's only so much you can do.