My Mom is in a nursing home and getting very hard to handle. What do I do?

Ask them to call the attending physcian or psychiatrist of the nursing home to evaluate your mother.

She just got out of the hospital. She had a bad UTI.
We meet with the case manger today, they are moving my mom to another NH with a lock down unit. She keeps trying to leave and threating to burn the place down so the firemen will get her out.
We believe she has sundown syndrome to. We use to blame her behavior on the UTI but now that that is cleared we know it is the dementia.

Mom's meds may need adjusting, or she may have a UTI. One way or the other she has to calm down or go to a lock up facility. Meet with the head of nursing and see what you can work out.

Yes. The NH should be able to deal with her behaviors or redirect her. I suggest that you and sis ask for a meeting with moms care team and NH director and see how everyone can work together on a solution. There may be some medications or physical therapies, etc that her dr can prescribe or arrange for that will help.

Don't let them bully you into running over there all the time or moving her to another facility. Also you and sis can instruct and list those instances where you want to be contacted. For example, you only want to be contacted in a medical emergency. You and sis will take alternate weeks to be on call or be contacted.

If they can't handle or mom is not in good care, then consider moving her to another NH.

Ask around to other resident's family if they are encountering same hassles.

Hope This helps; but you deserve peace of mind and not being harrassed over small non emergency issues.